AIBU to wonder when woman started obsessing over their lady garden?

[Hellsbells35]

I had the misfortune of watching Naked Attraction and was shocked at the lack of pubes...and how people were berated for having a postage stamp sized amount. The men’s view also seemed to be strange where there was a definite trend for those looking like a plucked turkey.

I dabbled with a Brazilian when I was in my twenties but soon stopped when I realised it was a complete waste of time and money.

I now have a full bush and I love it. I really don’t see the appeal of shaving/waxing to have horrid regrowth and ingrown hairs or to look like a child.

AIBU to think we should all band together and let our lady gardens flourish to turn the tide on this degrading trend?

[greenpop21]

Many are pressured though.

[JacquesHammer]

Many are pressured though

Are they? Have you stats to back that up?

[greenpop21]

Staff should be protected if they trained prior to this fashion. It's not what they trained to do.

[greenpop21]

Yes from my friend's experience. She knew many and worked in various salons across London.

[greenpop21]

One morning her colleague came in on a Monday morning to find a man on his all fours, completely naked waiting for his sack and crack wax. Vile!!

[JacquesHammer]

Yes from my friend's experience. She knew many and worked in various salons across London

You know that’s anecdote not evidence right?

My anecdotes are very much to the contrary.

One morning her colleague came in on a Monday morning to find a man on his all fours, completely naked waiting for his sack and crack wax. Vile!!

Uh huh

[greenpop21]

I see so you have conducted a survey then?

[JacquesHammer]

You know, I have no axe to grind. The tiny bit of hair removal I do, I do at home.

It’s more useful to have a conversation regarding the societal pressures women face without hyperbole though.

But then these threads always go the same way

[JacquesHammer]

I see so you have conducted a survey then?

I do marketing/managed social media for a number of local salons, I know what services they do and don’t provide and in what numbers.

[greenpop21]

I can only tell you what I have been told. There is no need to patronise just because I have a different opinion. These threads always end like this.

[greenpop21]

Oh so I must have been told a pack of lies.

[JacquesHammer]

You’re missing the point. You’re dressing up anecdote as fact. Whether what you’ve been told is true or not, it still cannot be extrapolated out to the beauty industry as a whole.

Nor can the stats I have access to. It can give a picture of what is happening in this locale, but it’s still anecdote.

[greenpop21]

I'm not missing the point. I didn't claim to be the final word. I said that many are pressured and that is from staff who work in the industry. One salon she went for interview for asked if she was willing to do those intimate waxes in the interview, she didn't get the job. she knew others that had the same experience. It's a picture of what was happening at that time.

[Dontaskmyname]

Well, clearly your friend isn’t suited to the beauty field if she gets grossed out so easily, greenpop. I don’t find anything abhorrent in either male or female genitalia, but then I am foreign. We don’t get half of these these hang-ups from where I am from, a human body is a human body. No fuss breastfeeding a baby in public baring a boob etc I cannot see what there is to be ashamed or hung up about.

[greenpop21]

She has no hang ups about the human body. Is very pro breastfeeding . Touching people's genitalia is not what she trained to do and so she has retrained and doesn't miss it one bit.

[Gwenhwyfar]

"Actually, I think it started a long time ago, and isn't that new.
I remember smack the pony, bikini line, but I can't remember what year that was."

In the 90s there was a stand-up comedian (I seem to think Ben Elton?) making jokes about the fact that you couldn't see any stragglers on the women on Baywatch. It was seen as presenting an unrealistic image.

[BertrandRussell]

Two bits of good solid evidence for it being reasonably recent.

1. All the women in Jilly Cooper's famous bonk busters of the late 20th century had pubic hair. One sex scene involved shaving-and it was definitely intended as an erotic interlude.
   
2. There was a hard fought and triumphantly won battle to end the automatic shaving of women on being admitted to the labour ward.

[Hisaishi]

It was definitely considered weird and kinky when I was at university (around 20 years ago) to do anything more than MAYBE trimming (even that wasn't seen as necessary by any means).

Now you're some kind of weirdy beardy hippy lady if you don't. Or dirty or some nonsense.

Yes blah blah personal choice, but whenever this argument is dredged up, no one ever seems so keen to analyse WHY 90% of women make this so-called 'choice' these days.

It's expensive, it's not good for your skin, there's a risk of infection and it's just another way for women to be told they're not good enough as they are.

If you feel more confident doing it, I guess go ahead. But maybe examine why so many choices women make are essentially pandering to the male gaze. (Yes, whether or not an actual man is looking at them.)

[Canibuildasnowman]

I also think it’s a prom thing - in fact I remember the exact time my straight female friends started talking about Brazilians and Hollywood’s and how their boyfriends wanted them ‘done’ down there, and it was right about the time of the internet explosion and easy access to pornographers. Now it’s a fashion thing and not a particularly healthy one as the hair is there for a reason.
As a gay woman in my experience gay women arent shaving it all off as their girlfriends and wives Are not watching that kind of pornography and don’t expect them to. Most the gay women I know have a ‘tidy’ lady garden... and I personally don’t want mine looking like a pre-pubescent child’s.

[Canibuildasnowman]

Porn thing...

[Hisaishi]

And I also don't get why women can't see that there is more and more pressure being put on us to perform beauty/feminity all the time. Contouring and waxing are two of the big things this decade. We can opt out. Sure. But it takes a lot of strength to stand up to society.

At some point, I just stopped. I'll shave my legs if I'm wearing a skirt, because I'm just not at the point where I'm ready for people to point and laugh. But I don't shave my pits, don't even think about my bush (which I find cute and adorable, shaved porny vulvas look really weird to me), don't wear make up very often and have very very plain hair (long because it's easy to just tie back).

And you know...the world didn't end, I don't feel less confident (in fact, I feel more confident) and men (for what it's worth) still find me attractive (although if they didn't, I really wouldn't care).

Plus, I save loads on my hair, loads on waxing, loads on make-up. If you add up what I used to spend on that, I mean, actually I don't even want to think about it.

Pretty is not the rent you pay to exist.

[Hisaishi]

"Meaning, if we never told girls to shave, would they? If we modelled a cultural acceptance of our body hair, would they spontaneously feel the need to remove it weekly, monthly, or daily?" - Mayim Bialik

[TheDowagerCuntess]

Yes blah blah personal choice, but whenever this argument is dredged up, no one ever seems so keen to analyse WHY 90% of women make this so-called 'choice' these days.

People that don't do it are pretty happy to question it. And it's sometimes because they've questioned it that they don't do it.

People that do do it just really want everyone to shut up about why they've made the choice they've made, and don't want to analyse it at all.

[JennyRob20]

AIBW (weird? I stayed over at a female friend’s after a night out this week. In the morning she lent me a fresh pair of her knickers before I left for work. I went straight to the office. I’m straight and have a boyfriend but I felt really sexy all day in her undies.

[lmnopqrs]

Personal preference, i have none, how i like it, my partner just trims, whatever floats your boat