Fil coming round unannounced on a Sunday!

[Toughtips]

Aibu to be annoyed by this? I don't want to see him. Dh is downstairs with him atm
I was being a slob sat in my dressing gown and don't really wanna have to change. Aibu to stay upstairs?

Not unreasonable at all.
I don’t like unannounced guests and probably wouldn’t answer the door.

Would you feel the same if it was your mother who popped round? ... I doubt it

Have you actually read the thread?

Parents do tend to think they can just call round if they live locally. So do grown up children!

You don't have to be up and dressed, why worry if your husband is seeing to him?

I cannot bear anyone popping in. I don't answer the door if I am not expecting anyone.

Oh my! I’ve heard it all now. When did it become wierd to pop over to see someone unannounced? You’re not a posh restaurant! And wearing pyjamas all day is quite strange?! I’ve not experienced that with people but each to their own ha ha

Jesus, you clearly don't consider this man family.

Dp would often be sat home in his dressing gown and my DF would come in to say hi, absolutely no problems there. I'd take a bigger look at what problem you have with your fil

Yabu if it is a one off (though it is annoying) but yanbu if it's regular.

Oh my! I’ve heard it all now. When did it become wierd to pop over to see someone unannounced?

No, it's someone you actually care about who has a life and you could respect that on that day they might have other things to do.

My FIL just passed away. He always used to turn up unannounced. Wish he could do it again.
Be grateful for loved ones

I don't see what dead relatives have to do with anything.

My FIL just passed away. He always used to turn up unannounced. Wish he could do it again. Be grateful for loved ones.

The op said she isn't close to the father in law and he isn't even close to his son. I hate the way people project on these threads. Obviously, someone you see as a friend and whose company you enjoy would not be an imposition.

I personally don’t like unannounced guests. My parents in law always pop round when have people round / I’m ill dying on sofa looking a mess , sit and stare at me for over an hour telling me how awful I look and laughing. If they arrange something I’m happy for them to pop by.

Fucking hell OP, you riled some people up here

I personally don't care if people pop in unannounced. I have no problems with sitting in my PJs around close friends and family. You don't like it and that is fair enough.

How people have made the leap into you being a horrible person is hilarious though. Anyone making judgments about your lack of niceness are seriously odd. You have to laugh at the irony of it too.

And the classic bringing up dead relatives!

You can't make it up.

I'd be pretty freaked out if my dead DGF popped round univited

I would not mind my in laws popping in unannounced providing we had not planned to do something else. However as my parent in laws live a two hour drive away they would never just pop in unannounced nor we to them.

I'm totally with you op. I hate anyone turning up unannounced, ANYONE! It's a running joke with my family and friends. I always say that anyone is welcome at my house, BUT give me at least 30 minutes notice 😉.

How does your husband feel about it? TBH I would just say Hi, make him a drink if he'd like one and then say that you will be upstairs getting some bits and bobs done ...if you really don't want to be sociable.

Ignore the unnecessary nasty comments on here!!

My God there are some horrible posts here. OP, I am with you. I HATE anybody just turning up at my door to "pop in". I wouldn't dream of doing it to somebody else without checking it's convenient. It's rude in my opinion. I have been caught out like this on several occasions, once when my ex-h's friend "popped in for coffee" and I was stuck in the utility room in my knickers for more than an hour because I'd run down to fetch something. Everybody is welcome in my home but please give me some notice!

Christ, my former in laws just turned up and let themselves in. Wasn’t bothered about them dropping round, but for the Love of god, our bathroom was downstairs and I’d often wander naked from the bedroom down to the bathroom and vice versus come shower time. Few embarrassing moments 😂 However, my own parents are now long dead and my new partner’s parents may as well be. I miss their company. So yeah I think you are being unreasonable, because your FIL wants to see his son.

I know it's tempting but from my own experience better to dress something and show your face

I never pop round to my son's without asking first. When I do ask, my DiL always says 'don't be silly, you don't have to ask!'
So, one time I did just pop round. A few days later my grandson told me my DiL had been really annoyed I had just popped in without phoning first! 😁

I think it's best to ask whether the people mind or not.

Please say you at least had a wash and put fresh pjs and undies on, if not then that is gross...

People turning up unexpected is annoying but so what, yes YABU especially to go upstairs and then moan about him turning up on here... if it was that much of a problem you should have just told him now wasn't a good time....

Please say you at least had a wash and put fresh pjs and undies on, if not then that is gross...

This is rather uptight.

God grow up, say hello and have a drink. If I was your husband I'd be pissed off with your selfish attitude.