To sell my house against DP and DSD wishes?

[AllTheKingsWomen]

I bought my house around 6 years ago. It’s a 4 bed detached in a nice area. When DP and I decided to move in together it made sense for him to move in with me as he was renting a tiny 2 bed house. He doesn’t pay towards my mortgage which suits me.
Over the 6 years I’ve slowly gone up the house myself room by room. It’s now exactly how I want it and is worth £40k more than I paid for it.
But now I’ve finished my ‘project’ I’m bored and ready for a new one so I’m thinking of selling up and buying a big Victorian terraced house to renovate. I always warned DP that I might end up wanting to do this.
Well, all out war has kicked off, DSD is gutted as this is the first time she’s lived in a “posh house” (her words) and she likes to bring friends over and show off. She said the houses I’m looking at at “embarrassing” “tatty” “old fashioned” and “scruffy”. DP agrees with her because basically he moved into a nicely done up house without having to lift a finger or spend a penny.

I feel that it’s my choice. I invested in this house and I love renovation and know I can make money doing it. AIBU to tell them it’s happening and they’re free to find somewhere else to live if they hate my idea so much?

@Motoko well, she isn't OP's child is she? It's her father's responsibility to meet her needs, not OP's.

This thread is a perfect illustration of step parents and how they are always reminded that they are NOT the parents, have NO say in decisions made about the children, can't overstep the mark, can't get too involved, don't have any rights.... but still expected to sacrifice EVERYTHING and get blamed for EVERYTHING.

Not OP's problem. Mum and dad's problem. 👍

I feel sorry for her partner's child (she's not technically a DSD as they are unmarried) because she has a lousy example for a father, but that's not the OP's responsibility to bear forever. He knew the terms of moving in and that she'd eventually want to sell up and take on another DIY property. He's had time to save up the rent he would have been paying.

tell them it’s happening and they’re free to find somewhere else to live if they hate my idea so much?

Go for it

Seriously, this is their HOME, am I the only one to think they should at least have a say!

The thing about living somewhere, and not paying for it (he is not contributing to the mortgage) is that you don't really get a say. Having 'done it up' why should OP stay and pay?

but I don’t see why I should feel trapped by them being here

Why are you even asking?

don't contribute to the payment of the mortgage such as SAH parents,

Just for the record, a SAH parent is contributing plenty to the family, just not financially. This set up is entirely different.

The DSD is only unfortunate wrt her father's decisions. It is no reason for the OP to not sell her house.

Seriously, this is their HOME, am I the only one to think they should at least have a say!

Yeah, it's really funny to read statements like this when you compare and contrast with threads regarding OPs in rental accommodation, which they've been paying to live in, who get served notice to quit - 'yeah, but it's not your property!' 'the landlord doesn't have to give you a reason why you need to leave, it's not your house!'.

......

If you want to save the relationship

How could there be any question of 'saving the relationship' in the face of used underwear left in the living spaces and curry wiped on the furniture?

That escalated quickly. And what an interesting first post.

“They ARE parasites, I agree with the poster who said that. Sponging bastards, let them fuck off and go back to renting.”

Imagine a man saying that about living with a woman who has children from a previous relationship, have you heard yourselves on this thread?

Still i guess you’re providing plenty of fodder for the blatant troll who is either plain old shit stirring or deliberately starting a ‘look at those manhaters on mn and their double standards’ thread, or all of the above eh

I feel sorry for DSD too.

To be honest OP you talk about their lack of respect for your/their home but your lack of respect for them is by far the worst.

You made it sound like he doesn't contribute to the mortgage because he's an arse but in fact, you stated that's how you wanted it. He accepted that arrangement but it shouldn't mean you get to disregard how they feel.