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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think I don’t owe my colleague an apology?

296 replies

Slytherdor · 22/11/2018 09:46

I will start by saying this is very petty, but this woman has form for being irritating, so I’m sticking to my guns where I might normally let it go.

Just to set the scene for you briefly- there’s a TV show I loved a few years back, stopped watching because they killed off a particular character who I thought was essential to why it was so good. I had no urge to watch it without them. (won’t say the show or character in case someone has just started watching!)

Anyway. This morning I was in the kitchen at work making coffee, there were two colleagues in there discussing this show. The first one (hereafter referred to as CC, crazy colleague) had evidently convinced the other colleague (OC) to watch this show, and they were both talking about how great it was. I was minding my own business. Eventually, CC turns to me and says ‘oh Slytherdor, you MUST watch this show.’

I responded that I actually used to love it, but stopped after season X due to the character death. She responds ‘watch season Y’. I again enforced that I didn’t want to due to character death. She goes ‘trust me, watch season Y.’

I am now pretty intrigued, so I say ‘are they not really dead? I will definitely watch it if so!’ she just gives me a weird smile and says again ‘trust me, watch season Y’.

I say ‘are they alive?’ and she again repeats ‘trust me, watch season Y’ with the same weird face. At this point I genuinely can’t tell if the person is still alive, or if she’s just so passionate about this show and trying to get me to watch it. I therefore say ‘are they alive? I’ll watch it if they are alive again, I won’t if they aren’t.’ her response?

‘trust me, watch season Y’.

I’m now starting to get pretty irritated. I don’t want to be forced into watching this show just because she thinks I should, and the fact that I am politely asking over and again and getting the same line back is annoying me.

I say ‘I have no interest in watching if they aren’t alive CC, but I defo will if they are. Are they?’

‘trust me, watch season Y’

SAME WEIRD SMILE.

I then say ‘look, I will literally watch it tonight if they are, just tell me.’

‘trust me, watch season Y’

So I just shrug. ‘I’ll leave it, then. But I agree it was a great show.’

I turn back to my coffee, and she goes ‘TRUST ME SLYTHERDOR, WATCH SEASON Y’.

The OC laughs a little nervously and says ‘you will want to watch….’

CC cuts her off shrieking ‘spoilers!!!’

I laugh a bit. ‘it’s ok, I asked to be spoiled, I specifically want to know as I would be frustrated to watch it and waste my time if they aren’t alive. Are they?’

‘trust me, watch season Y’.

Oh man, I was so annoyed by now. So I get out my phone. ‘that’s fine, I’ll just google it. Thanks for the heads up.’

She then KNOCKS THE PHONE OUT OF MY HAND and shrieks ‘no, spoilers!!!!!’

I was aghast, and so angry that she had not only hit me (lightly tbf) but also knocked my phone on the ground. I said ‘are you serious? I can’t even spoil it for myself? I want to know!’

She says ‘why can’t you just trust me!’ and I say ‘because I can’t tell if they are alive or you are just trying to make me watch it, and I really don’t want to waste my time.’

She literally glares at me. So I laugh a little, pick up my coffee and leave. She makes this weird growling, shrieking, frustrated noise as I walk off- very bizarre.

Anyway, just now, I got an IM from OC. ‘don’t tell CC I told you, but they are alive!’

By this point I have googled it, but I am still grateful to her for telling me so I say I am very thankful to her and assure her I will watch, we discuss the show a bit.

I then say ‘that was so weird, why wouldn’t she just tell me’.

She replies ‘I know, she gets very passionate about it. She was upset you didn’t trust her, but she’ll be fine if you apologise.’

I’m like, what? I’m not apologising! She hit me!

She’s just said ‘I know, that was crazy. She won’t let it go if you don’t though.’

I replied that I don’t particularly care if she won’t let it go, I am not apologising for asking to know what happens in a TV show.

She just replied ‘fair enough’ with a smile emoji, and that’s that.

I clearly think this woman is insane and have no wish to apologise to her for this whole scenario. I find the whole thing very childish but I really resent the idea that I owe her an apology, especially since she hit me on the hand. However, the fact that OC suggested I apologise is making me question myself.

Thoughts?

OP posts:
poodlespoodles · 24/11/2018 06:25

I love Jane the virgin!

I've watched the last season and I get why she wouldn't confirm that. It's because of the way it was done.

It's such a clever show and gets better and better with each season.

If you haven't seen it - give it a go!

Aridane · 24/11/2018 07:59

Aw - and OP was being so careful,to,avoid naming the programme

Anniegetyourgun · 24/11/2018 08:13

Somehow I must have missed the announcement that AIBU is only for serious subjects. Anyway you can't say you weren't warned: as usual, the disclaimers in the very first paragraph of the OP warned that it was a petty subject and added that she would normally let it go. That would have saved at least half of the posters on here wasting their valuable time typing a rude response.

Re wasting work time arguing, all the offices I've worked in have had scheduled breaks where you can grab a coffee and have an argument about TV programmes to your heart's content, as long as you go back to your desk afterwards and get some actual work done. (Some are better at the last bit than others.)

As for the "as bad as each other" comments, throwing someone's fragile and expensive possessions around is a sight more unhinged than continuing an argument you could have ended a few sentences earlier. OP did well not knocking her block off, let alone yelling at her which is what I'd probably have done at that point (I haven't had a smart phone very long and I would be hard pressed to afford a replacement).

ForalltheSaints · 24/11/2018 08:15

Very petty but stick to your guns and say nothing more about this.

OffToBedhampton · 24/11/2018 08:22

@MistyMinge. GrinGrinGrin
As many PPs have said - Google is your friend. Easier to 'yuh-huh' her and go away to Google that one fact.

I haven't got that for on (TV show) after (person) died but I imagine if he comes back it'll be twisted & complex part of plot. So, annoying though she is, she was far too invested in the show to give up that fact. Still, I bet she wraps small presents in big boxes to befoxed the reviewer & is a "Guess how much I saved on this bag in sale? ..no .. guess... guess...!"

memorial · 24/11/2018 08:22

Are you 13?

Scientistic · 24/11/2018 08:25

THIS >>

you are correct that she is batshit.

however - you are just as batshit.

bloodyhellimtired · 24/11/2018 12:46

I stopped watching when Michael died too. It bugs me that they put Jane through all that grief, only for him to come back.

But then, I stopped watching homeland when Quinn died 😭😭 Quuiiiinnnnnnn 😢

granny24 · 24/11/2018 13:30

You are six years old. And work in an office. And have your own phone? Wow

Boulty · 24/11/2018 15:46

wow

I am so glad I don't work near any of you - you all sound completely bonkers (over a TV show!)

Leapfrog44 · 24/11/2018 16:43

are you all 4 years old??

Alana87 · 24/11/2018 19:11
Grin
clarkl2 · 24/11/2018 19:24

You both sound weird and intense.

Mymomsbetterthanyomom · 24/11/2018 21:36

Looooove Jane the Virgin!!!
I just got caught up on Netflix and I actually did the outloud "what/gasp/holy cow" thing all at once when she saw him!!!

LaughingGiraffing · 24/11/2018 22:04

I KNEW it was JTV.

YABVU. She was right. You have to watch season 4, right to the last episode (and yes he is Grin)

LaughingGiraffing · 24/11/2018 22:06

Also search FB for "Jane the Virgin fans" group there's about 20,000 members and it's full of wonderful batshit theories, people are going back to find clues 😂😂 although they have a point, the storylines have been set from the beginning and there's a huge amount of foreshadowing

AliceRR · 25/11/2018 20:00

I guessed Jane the Virgin too

Hereiam1980 · 26/11/2018 08:02

You both sound really intense! If you knew she was nutty why did you keep it going?? You both irritated each other and behaved like children! Was there that many exchanges?? If so your bloody bonkers! As for her Aleppo g the phone out of your hands, no she shouldn’t at all, but you were both seriously winding each other up! You should have cut it short and left. To be frank, fucking childish and as bad as each other.

Cassie71 · 26/11/2018 08:15

Lots of characters come back after a death, such as memories and flashbacks.

MsHopey · 26/11/2018 08:54

I didn't even think it was JTV.
I've been watching it. I actually think it's sillier that he's coming back.
My theory is he went undercover for a bit. But that's shit to Jane.

Boomah · 26/11/2018 18:06

I love that show! I've also recommended it to so many people and waited in glee for him to come back. I would be pissed at being teased too, I was devastated when he died!

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