To not want to go to Dubai?

[BrieAndChilli]

DH sister (much younger - in her 20s) is moving to Dubai - her friend moved over there, she’s visited a couple of times had a great time partying so has now got a job out there. All good. She’s leaving end of the month. We will all miss her but not DHs family are talking about going over there for a family holiday next year.
I’ve looked at flights and for the 5 of us it would be about £3k plus then accommodation as I doubt she would be able to put us all up plus spending money etc.
We have never spent that amount of money on a holiday but if she was in austrialia/Thailand/America I would scrimp and save as I know we would have a great time.
However from what I have read about Dubai it’s basically a giant shopping mall in the desert. Fine if all you want when you go on holiday is to sit around the pool all day and eat and drink all night but that’s not us nor the kids.
Would I be unreasonable to say thanks but no thanks I’d rather go on an expensive holiday elsewhere?

Not to drop feed but when we were in our 20s we went abroad for 3 years so MIL, SIL who was a young teenager, aunt and cousin all came out 2 years running for a holiday with us in the south of France.
However that was much much cheaper than Dubai!!

You couldn't pay me to go to Dubai and all I've experienced is the utterly shit airport for 8 hours. YANBU.

YANBU- I have been and would never go back nor recommend it. Soulless, boring, artificial place.

I would never visit. The human rights abuses are terrible and the treatment of women is appalling

Why not suggest that your dh goes with his family? That way he can pay part accommodation, still see his sister, and you can still have a family holiday.

Well I wouldn’t as it’s not my idea of a good holiday destination either. You could possibly offer for your DH to keep an eye on cheap flights and go for a long weekend there alone?

You'd be very unreasonable to say that you'd rather go somewhere else instead as that's really rather rude but YANBU not to want to go. I love travelling to unusual places where you can experience the local culture etc but Dubai is not really the kind of place you can do that; you might as well go to Blackpool or Sharm El Sheikh IMO.

Nope, I have no desire to ever go to Dubai. If you wanted to sit around a pool etc there are lots of cheaper alternatives to. But what does your DH say?

Its a hard one, Dubai doesn't appeal to me either. But I can see why DH might want to see his sister. Maybe just DH goes?

I’m under a lot of pressure from family to go and I always blatantly refuse. I have absolutely zero desire to go there. Most of my friends think I’m insane for turning down a luxury holiday there - I don’t even want to stay at the airport overnight in transit!

My reasons are to do with human rights, modern day slavery, greed/corruption and the massive differences in the law. I also don’t react well to the heat, the desert is my idea of hell and I don’t like the materialistic aspect of much of what I’ve seen. It just all seems so artificial and “fake”. I feel much the same about Las Vegas. Just not my cup of tea at all.

It's a shithole, and disproportionally more so for women. I'll never go again.

Wouldn't touch that place with a barge pole.

I've been before with DH and as a woman I felt very uncomfortable, however not as bad as my friend who went with her DH not long after. She's white British. Her husband's family are from Pakistan but he was born and raised here. The abuse they (she moreso) received was horrendous.
I wouldn't visit again and they certainly won't.

However from what I have read about Dubai it’s basically a giant shopping mall in the desert.

You have read correctly. It's a soulless place with a horrible climate much of the year. It might be OK for a brief stopover on the way to Hong Kong or Australia, but even if all you want is a sunshine and shopping style holiday, there are so many places which are cheaper, nicer and closer.

I went under duress, it was as PPs have said, soulless expensive and somehow as a city it felt arrogant. I hated it. Never again.

Well there are things you can do in Dubai apart from shop, depending on what time of year you go there. There's fun to be had scuba diving, boating, dune bashing, crab fishing for example, and you can go to the souk as well as the shopping malls. Having lived there for a few years though I'm in no hurry to go back, and you can't go out for three months of the year because it's too hot, plus Ramadan isn't much fun so they'd better choose their dates very carefully.

None of this is relevant though - unless you have plenty of time and money to spare for other holidays more to your choice then you shouldn't go to Dubai. Does your husband feel the same or does he want to go?

YANBU for that flight cost you could go to Orlando instead new can of worms and have a holiday that your DCs would really enjoy.
We nearly ended up doing a stopover in Dubai for our trip next year to NZ and I am slightly disappointed that we're stopping in Doha instead, but really that's the only way I'd visit if I had to en route.

Is it really that bad? Loads of people seem to like it.
It isn’t my cup of tea at all but then I haven’t been and get snotty about human rights abuses and heard it is like a giant Westfield. But I cannot help thinking I must be missing something.

There's other things to do other than shop - there's a Legoland, indoor theme
Park, ice skating, a global village. Yes it's a lot of malls and restaurants or just lazing by the pool but that's then lifestyle there. It's not a cultural place at all. I like it for a long weekend ( I live in Kuwait so it's a nice short flight and a good break for us plus we can drink there and buy proper bacon 🥓🤣) but I couldn't live there. I find it a bit pretentious - much prefer it here

Human rights issues aside, I wouldn’t pay loads of money (or indeed any money) to go to Dubai simply because it seems like a really bland uninteresting place- exactly as you said OP a shopping mall in the desert.

Blimey she may not even still be working there next year!

YANBU. Hideous in my opinion. Would spend hols money on Australia, NZ, or somewhere else that's luxurious but with interesting things to do!

If you honestly wouldn't go if it were your sister/parents then then I don't think yabu. I don't think you should stop DH going though if he wants to.

Why not get her to meet you all, rent a villa and have a holiday somewhere nicer?

I visited Dubai 6 times between 2004 and 2014- both when it was still a desert and before it became a mass of skyscrapers and after- and whilst I have no desire to go back there anytime soon (its pretty boring), the people saying that they felt "pretty uncomfortable" as a woman, I do beg to differ. The thing I really valued out there was how safe I felt, even in the middle of the night, travelling on public transport was a dream because the front section of the trains and buses are for women and children only. Also, I ensured that I dressed appropriately for the country that I was in (as I do with every country I visit). Never experienced anything untoward (and was in my late teens/twenties everytime I visited).

I wouldn't holiday in Dubai even if it was free to fly there. There are so very many reasons not to. YANBU.