Aibu to not want to show my sister our bedroom

[WibbleWobbleBumBum]

First house, a long time coming. We’ve now been in for a couple of months. My sister is coming over tomorrow. I don’t want to show her our bedroom (plus shower room). Now that it’s been lived in for a bit it feels like dh and my private space.

It’s not anything to do with not trusting her or whatever but I just don’t want anyone but me and dh in there. Aibu?

If not how do I tell her ‘it feels too private to let you in’.

It's your choice as it's your room but she will think you're hiding something

Why would anyone give a fuck that someone thinks they are hiding something?
Also weird that people assume there's a sexual secret because you don't want nosey gits examining your bedroom!

It really is only on mumsnet I see this attitude of house tours being weird.

In my limited world, if a close friend or family member buys a new house, it's normal to show you round it. Not specifically because you want to see, but more that they want to show off their new home.

I find it very odd that people have close friends and family that they don't want to show round their new homes when they visit for the first time. That it's in some way off bounds.

If we take the op. The cleaner is allowed in, the electrician, but she won't let her sister see in the room. The idea makes her deeply uncomfortable. She'd rather the cleaner saw it than her own sister. As witnessed by most on this thread, that's quite an unusual stance to take.

When you buy a new house of course you want to show it off to people and give them a tour of the house. It is absolutely weird you won't show a family member a quick look at your bedroom.

When you buy a new house of course you want to show it off to people and give them a tour of the house. It is absolutely weird you won't show a family member a quick look at your bedroom

You do know that not everyone is like you?
OPs house isn't new, she's been living there. Not everyone is a show off or needs people to look in their rooms and be impressed.
Not everyone is nosey

Very odd and likely to hurt your sister’s feelings

@Limensoda I didn't say it had to be sexual...

She might be having problems with her weight and have gym equipment hidden that she doesn't want people to know about

Her and DP could have twin beds because they're having marriage issues

There could be masses of washing in there because she's shoved it out of the way

Not all sexual, not all even bad, but hidden

Not all sexual, not all even bad, but hidden

I didn't say YOU said there was a sexual reason, others have.
God forbid that people want to keep something private! How dare they when others want to see it.
It's shocking people can't see beyond their own expectations and demands and have no respect for other people's privacy and shocking they think it's not them that's weird.

Gosh you seem very angry and over invested limensoda?

You would hate me! When my sister stays over I call her into my room in morning when husband goes work and we have TV in bed!! Never though of it being private? But I guess depends what you do in there? If it's a 50 shades type bedroom then it's understandable!

Not everyone is a show off or needs people to look in their rooms and be impressed. Not everyone is nosey

Yeah, that's totally why people give others a quick tour of the new house - it's because they feel inadequate.

My imagination would run riot if I wasn't allowed in a bedroom. I think you'd prefer me to see the reality.

I hate people going in my bedroom!! Used to live in a flat and front door was next to my bedroom. Mil obviously didn't have a problem with just walking in whenever she fancied it. Hated it. I now keep the door closed all the time

I think you'd prefer me to see the reality

Nope, really wouldn't. I'd have to care what you think?

Gosh you seem very angry and over invested limensoda?

Shocked that so many people think OP is weird. Not angry.

Very strange 👀

I think it’s really odd so many people have put a sexual twist on ops reason for not wanting to show her room. It’s ridiculous and really quite spiteful.

I don't understand why anyone would find it spiteful

'Hun' 🤮

@LoniceraJaponica

Because she’s being deliberately wound up about the room being a sex dungeon.

There could be masses of washing in there because she's shoved it out of the way

Yep, that has happened to me when someone wanted a "tour". Heap of washing, things shoved out of the way because no-one would be going in the room! Yes, I was pretty embarrassed. It was an older male relative on the other side of the family who I didn't know especially well. It hadn't occurred to me that anyone at a 2-hour family gathering would want a "tour" of our unremarkable house.

I've never given anyone a tour of my house or been given one. Is this a thing?

Your close friends and immediate family have never seen round your house?

Well my mum and dad have seen all the rooms obviously just out of circumstance, and my close friend has seen the kids rooms when she's picked her DC up, but a tour? Nope.

I don’t get why people want fo look around tbh. Sure if your helping the family actually move in you will see the rooms but as a visitor all I need to know is where the bathroom/kitchen/livingroom are surely.

I like showing people our bedroom because it's the second nicest room in the house and it's usually the tidiest, there isn't anything to get messy except the duvet. (Because I don't count the babygym on the floor and teddies on the sofa as messy.)

I think most people like to look around houses. It is nosiness, of course, but of the friendliest kind. People are usually trying to be nice and compliment the owner's taste - the furniture, pictures etc.