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AIBU?

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Original poster

To spend nearly £2,000 on a sofa?

228 replies

SofaSofa · 21/10/2018 16:09

Just moved to a beautiful little house, just me, DD and the cat.

Earlier this year I left a DV relationship and although I am much happier I have been left with Anxiety and PTSD. I have been told to be kind to myself, although I find it difficult.

Ex took me to court for custody of our DD just weeks after we split but due to his controlling nature and the violence he has no contact with DD. I’d like to say it’s liberating to not have to see or speak to him, but actually it’s bloody hard. I constantly feel like I am failing DD and am often tempted to ignore the court order and let Ex back into her life – he does still text me and say he misses her and wants to see her, but my solicitor says he’s just feeling angry that he can no longer control me, I still feel awful.

Saying all this to give background as to why I need to spend so much.

I’ve fallen in love with a corner sofa. Fabric and Leather, in a gorgeous colour. I’ve tried it in store and it’s so comfy – I have a ratty old secondhand one Ex was given by his parents which although comfy the fabric is fading and was given while I was pregnant so has sick stains on it despite me scrubbing.

DD is 4 and is not allowed to eat on the sofa at all. She eats at the table in the kitchen or in the old non matching armchair that we were given with the sofa, which I will be keeping. Cat

The sofa is £1,799. It would be my only treat for the year. I work and get a bonus of £1,000 in November so I’d wait to buy it until that came through. I have the rest of the money in savings. I’d still be left with around £200 savings and I can build them up again slowly. I also have a credit card which is currently unused which has the amount of credit that it would take to run my house should I need it.

AIBU? Or do I just need to wait? I was never allowed to spend money on furniture during my relationship as it took money from Ex so I am unsure of spending so much on myself.

Sofa is this if anyone’s interested www.harveysfurniture.co.uk/arlington-left-hand-facing-corner-group-with-chaise-media-tray/?sv_source=GOOGLE&sv_medium=cpc&sv_campaign=PLA_Corner_Sofas_HIGH&sv_term=PRODUCT_GROUP&&gclid=CjwKCAjwx7DeBRBJEiwA9MeX_HBBcSSnKx3eN9X0xh5niNojbgdh7_U3OiaUgM-CIvcGnK9ZxjxG6RoCS2gQAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds&dclid=CNHrhN3kl94CFcKB3god3fsLYg#arlington-left-hand-facing-corner-group-with-chaise-media-tray/details/16006-16109/

OP posts:
Original poster
SofaSofa · 21/10/2018 16:10

*Cat doesn't scratch furniture

OP posts:
tissuesosoft · 21/10/2018 16:12

There’s an extra 10% off on top of the price with the discount code. I would definitely get it and keep an eye out for discount codes when you’re ready to buy

AhhhhThatsBass · 21/10/2018 16:13

Will that sofa bring you joy? If so, and you can afford it, do it.

MrsGarethSouthgate · 21/10/2018 16:13

I have no issue with you buying it if you can afford it, but you are very brave to think of doing so with a 4 year old, no matter where she eats!

user1493242132 · 21/10/2018 16:14

Would you rather not keep the money and throw some lovely throws over your current sofa? Not sure I’d spend so much on a sofa when much better things can be done with the money

Fairylea · 21/10/2018 16:14

Go for it! You don’t need to justify yourself or your spending to anyone anymore. Flowers

AppleTree0915 · 21/10/2018 16:15

I wouldn’t use your existing savings and bonus for it - you should keep that for emergencies. Why not buy on the interest free finance and pay over 12-48 months? It doesn’t cost anymore to do it that way but you don’t cut into savings.

Unicornandbows · 21/10/2018 16:15

Wait for Black Friday!! Might not be 1700 anymore or even around December.

If it was in May I'd say buy now but seen as your à couple weeks from major discounts I would just wait to buy it.

Looks lovely and you both deserve it x

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 21/10/2018 16:16

If you can afford it OP and you absolutely love it then I say go for it.
Well done on getting out of your toxic relationship, best of luck to you and your DD Flowers

ilovesooty · 21/10/2018 16:16

I bought mine from Harvey's - leather corner sofa costing about that much. My cat isn't allowed in the living room while I'm out but has shown no interest in scratching the sofa when I'm at home. He's sitting on it next to me now.

I considered it money well spent - go for it.

littlethings99 · 21/10/2018 16:16

I would say go for it. My in-laws have this exact sofa and it is super comfy. A big sofa that you can cuddle into like this makes all the difference. Like PP said, keep an eye out on Black Friday, you might get an even better deal.

moredoll · 21/10/2018 16:17

Wait until the January sales, then have a good look around and treat yourself.

isseywithcats · 21/10/2018 16:17

that is georgous and why not treat yourself from harveys it will be good quality, we bought ours from them and yes it was a 2 grand sofa, but two years later it still looks like new and i have four cats just be aware they make to order from there and we had a four month wait for ours this is ours hopefully the pic will load

To spend nearly £2,000 on a sofa?
SoyDora · 21/10/2018 16:17

If you can afford it and it will make you happy then why not?
We have fairly expensive sofas. 2 DD’s (4 and 3) who also aren’t allowed to eat anywhere other than the table. Sofas still look as good as new after a year.

Whatsnewwithyou · 21/10/2018 16:18

I personally wouldn't, as I would make it a priority to build up my savings so that I had a cushion. You are living pretty close to paycheck to paycheck and for me, the security of having savings in the bank to deal with any emergencies that could crop up, including job loss, would feel a lot better than sitting on a fancy couch would.

British Heart Foundation often gets really nice couches in. We have a lovely gplan one we got there, it's extremely comfortable and in beautiful condition. There's no need to buy a ratty one there, just keep checking back until they have one in you like. You can also ask to see any they have "in the back" - at the one near me if you ask nicely they'll take you back and show you the ones that haven't made it onto the shop floor yet!

sixtyeleven · 21/10/2018 16:20

Looks really comfy but do you think it might come down in the sales? We got £300 off ours in a sale - paid for a holiday!

fanomoninon · 21/10/2018 16:21

First off, congratulations on getting yourself, dd and the cat into a lovely little home and escaping from your ex: that's an amazing thing to have done :-)

My policy on sofas (& kitchens) is to try and buy at maximum sale price, having once had to watch a sofa I'd bought at a small percentage off going down and down in price! If you were going to delay until Nov anyway, could you wait until the new year as there are often massive sofa sales then... Maybe in the meantime buy some gorgeous cushions that will look fabulous when you invest in the new sofa, but also cheer the old sofa up for now! Is the rest of the room 'sofa ready ' ?! Again, maybe lick of paint now so there's no danger of getting paint on your new beauty?!

Sorry if that's a bit dull of me: I'm a sensible person with savings, especially just before Christmas!

sparklepops123 · 21/10/2018 16:22

Go for it! We bought a corner sofa about 2 2 2 year ago around the same price and I still love it. We bought ours on interest free credit though but increased the payments per month to a hundred pounds so was paid off just over a yr and half, would this be better so you’ve still got your savings

FeckTheMagicDragon · 21/10/2018 16:23

Do it! Now or see if it comes down in the sales. But do it.
My heart breaks a little that you have to justify it to us and yourself due to the mental conditioning your husband put you through.
Never, ever let that man back into your life. Block him, change your number, never reply to him.

sparklepops123 · 21/10/2018 16:23

That’s 2 yr ago ! 😲

speakout · 21/10/2018 16:24

OP I wouldn't.

If you have only £200 in savings then a £2K sofa is not worth it.

How much pleasure can furniture bring?

I have 4 sofas in my home, all second hand, The one I am sitting on is an M&S three seater.
I bought it for £80, in mint condition.
Would have cost £2500 new.

I keep my savings.

Bluelady · 21/10/2018 16:24

Buy it. You deserve to have something new that brings you joy. We always use 0% finance where it's available as it is here. That way you retain your emergency cushion.

averageisgood · 21/10/2018 16:26

Go of it OP. Every time you settle down on it to relax you will feel the joy.

speakout · 21/10/2018 16:26

Bluelady
I don't agree. It's a sofa.
OP would be better spending that money on something more life enhancing.

It;s a fucking sofa
It will be lovely for the first few weeks, but then what?

isseywithcats · 21/10/2018 16:27

we got ours on 0% credit even though my other half earns more than enough to have paid cash for it