To feel miffed

[Nicpem1982]

I know im probably abu

Dd(4)has asked to start an additional dance class in a different style, the sat class doesn't fit with the timings of her current dance class so theyve offered her a midweek class

Ils have said they wont take her as they have commitments with dn in the week with her clubs and its too much

I respect its their time and decision bit i can't help feeling a bit annoyed as it just feels so one sided because

Its not a long term commitment as in 2 terms dds current class time will change and the sat class will fit

We rarely ask for weekend childcare but dn is there every weekend

Its 14 miles round trip to dance dns school is a 60 mile round trip with clubs

Both pils drive so if theres occasional clashes it could still be done

It just feels so unfair that dd has to miss out

Aibu to feel miffed

OP, aren't you just a treat?!?

I hope your DN builds a loving relationship with her GPS and family that will help her get through this horrible time in her life. And if that means an imbalance in the amount of childcare her GPS provide to her and your DD then so be it. I can't even believe you asked this AIBU question.

My working theory now is that op has rather over egged the pudding.

The op has been posting for years, so I do think she is just a selfish arse. Reading past posts it appears that op clearly feels she has gone above and beyond to help her DN. But mainly as point scoring exercise and she thinks the death of her sil shouldn't be an issue.

The truth is that it will always be issue. Life moves on after a death of a parent, especially when kids are young. But it's always going to be an issue.

It’s only 2 terms. The grandparents probably think a 4 yo has to wait 2 terms to start a new class, so what? Most people think a 4 yo has to wait 2 terms for a new dance class is about on par with them getting a gingerbread cookie instead of a chocolate one- a complete non event.
Few parents would treat a 4yo and a 6yo identically. If your dd does ask, say dn is 6 darling, she is older. When will you be 6? And count 5, 6. Question answered.
Your complete failure to understand there might be emotional confext to being able to see a son and gc who had cut them out before is a serious personal lack of empathy and human understanding.

OP was rumbled as the selfish idiot that she is and has flounced from the thread.

Awful

Think there will be a name change somewhere ....

MarthasGinYard I think that too. Although she must know she us in the wrong. You wouldn't be arsed or embarrassed if you thought this shit was ok.

OP, just in case you're still there...

You think it's unfair that your dd misses out on another class? I think it's bloody unfair that your DN has lost her mother. Do you know how fucked up that's going to leave her? Trust me, your dd not being able to do another class doesn't even register in comparison. I'm 30 years down the line from your DD - I lost my father when I was 6. To natural causes. And I am still totally fucked up about it. My life would be a whole lot different if I hadn't gone through that. How I wish I'd simply lost the opportunity to go to a dance class instead.

However much your ILs do for that little girl will never be enough. They can never make up for what she has lost, but they can do their best.

I want to give that poor girl, and her father, a big hug. I just hope you learn some compassion sooner rather than later.

Spoiler alert

OP - AIBU
MN - yes massively, and entitled, ungrateful and lacking compassion
OP fecked off
The end