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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To shout at 6yo DS for wetting the bed the 4th time in a week

206 replies

Acunningruse · 20/10/2018 09:46

As above. DS has been toilet trained reliably since age 3, and dry at night since age 4. The last few weeks he's been wetting the bed perhaps once a week, last week it was around 3 times and even more this week.
I'm afraid I completely lost it at 2.30am when he wandered in and announced nonchalantly that "I've had a leak mummy" no you haven't had a leak you have weed yourself again!!
What's concerning me is he doesn't seem bothered at all, I would have thought at just turned 6 he would be embarrassed about it.

He seems really happy in all areas, absolutely thriving at school and generally an active happy boy so I'm at a loss as to what's causing it.

Any ideas? At 2.30this morning I threatened to put him in nappies but I really don't want to do this.

OP posts:
CIT80 · 20/10/2018 09:48

Tell me this is a joke !!!

Nobody wakes up in A wet bed through choice or laziness -

I suggest you go and apologise to him straight away

Familyfeud22 · 20/10/2018 09:48

YABU, what a horrible reaction :(

Candlelights2345 · 20/10/2018 09:48

Shouting at him won’t help, I doubt he’s done it on purpose.
How much is he drinking in the hours before bedtime?

Singlebutmarried · 20/10/2018 09:49

Wow. My DD did this at a similar age after being dry.

Turned out she was being bullied at school.

WasabiSpring · 20/10/2018 09:49

Well if this is for real he'll certainly be embarrassed and ashamed now. So maybe that'll help Hmm

NoUnicornsToSeeHere · 20/10/2018 09:50

My six and a half year old floods through his nappies and wets his bed perhaps five nights out of seven. Count yourself lucky.

Peridot1 · 20/10/2018 09:50

Could be a UTI?

could be lots of things. And he is not doing it deliberately or through laziness.

Shouting at him was really not helpful. Poor boy.

Endofthelinefinally · 20/10/2018 09:50

You need to make sure he doesn't have a UTI, threadworms (although they usually cause bed wetting in girls not boys), or chronic constipation/ impaction.
Shouting at him probably isn't going to help.

Original poster
Acunningruse · 20/10/2018 09:50

I know IWBU, I thought that was obvious! I have had broken sleep for weeks now due to him wetting the bed, I was so tired and I lost it.

I agree surely no one would choose this but he doesn't seem remotely bothered which I find strange.

He's my eldest and I have no experience of bed wetting hence posting for ideas on how to deal with this.

OP posts:
Porpoises · 20/10/2018 09:51

Yes. He's asleep, he can't help it. Poor kid!

HairyArmpits · 20/10/2018 09:51

I don't think that you have the right attitude or the right approach to this. Sorry but I don't.

Regardless whether toilet trained, that's completely irrelevant. There is a reason for it and you need to sensibly and kindly find out the reason why.

A trip to the gp, a chat to your child's teacher as well as a gentle chat with your child would be my recommendations.

Definitely not shouting at him.

Sitranced · 20/10/2018 09:51

What do you think shouting at him would achieve?

Mumof1DS · 20/10/2018 09:51

The poor little guy Sad maybe monitor his fluid intake before bed for a while?

Tahani · 20/10/2018 09:51

Totally completely YABU

put him in pull ups if you don't want to be woken by 'leaks'
Shouting at him for something he can't help will do more damage than good

AdorableMisfit · 20/10/2018 09:51

Take him to the doctor. Sudden bedwetting after being dry could be a sign of a medical problem.

Annechristmas · 20/10/2018 09:52

My idea is that you don't be so nasty to your child. Poor little thing.

LimboLuna · 20/10/2018 09:52

Good one, that will make him stop. Hmm

Assuming he’s not had anything upsetting going on. My understanding with boys is when they have a growth spurt it takes a while for the necessary bits to catch up so the message gets through to wake or not wee.
So potentially your shouting at him for biology.

Fluffychickenmonkey · 20/10/2018 09:53

What an appalling thing to do to your child

Cherries101 · 20/10/2018 09:53

Have you taken him to a GP? Sudden bedwetting at his age can be a sign of diabetes.

LuluBellaBlue · 20/10/2018 09:53

Maybe he doesn’t seem bothered as that’s his way of coping? You know he’s not fully emotionally developed yet as he’s a child.
Also perhaps he’s being defensive if you’re reaction is anything to go by Hmm

UpstartCrow · 20/10/2018 09:53

Acunningruse
Put 2 sets of bedding on with a barrier layer in the middle, so you can just whip the top set off in the night.

There's no such thing as 'reliably trained', so just drop that idea altogether. Dont make a big deal of it. Shaming them is not the way to raise confident adults.

LuluBellaBlue · 20/10/2018 09:53

*your

Original poster
Acunningruse · 20/10/2018 09:53

He has suffered from UTIs previously so definitely worth getting that checked thank you.

We have limited drinks after 6pm since the bed wetting started.

Bullying- it could be I would just find it so hard to believe, it's a small village school where everyone knows everyone, parents are involved with the school and when I've Seen him at school he seems really happy and popular. Should I mention it to his teacher?

OP posts:
CherryPavlova · 20/10/2018 09:53

It’s very common to wet the bed at six still. He might just be very tired and falling into an exceptionally deep sleep as school have increased the intensity of learning and he’s doing more physically.

Try to be kind. Do let him help with the clearing up and leave him spares to change into ready.

kalinkafoxtrot45 · 20/10/2018 09:54

Make up his bed with a plastic sheet, then bedsheets, then another plastic sheet and bedsheet. He’s old enough that if he sets, he can take the dirty sheets off and put them in the machine. But do get him checked out if it’s come on suddenly, there can be lots of reasons both minor and major, my godson did this and turned out he was diabetic, and therefore drinking a lot, which he couldn’t then hold at night.