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Original poster

To think who gets married on a Monday

183 replies

MardyArabella · 19/10/2018 10:43

An immediate family member is getting married on a Monday next year. I know it’s an invitation not a summons I can’t not go without causing a serious rift in my family but Jfc could they have picked a worse day? Wedding is also 3 hours from where I live so will need two days off work.

OP posts:
gokartdillydilly · 19/10/2018 13:11

Surely you could just get up early the next day and get to work on time? Three hours driving is nothing for a one-off occasion

Waspnest · 19/10/2018 13:11

My DH didn't attend his Dsis's wedding (it was her second) because everyone knew suspected she'd been having an affair with her fiance behind her ex-husband's back. DH told me he wasn't playing happy families when he thought his sis had behaved so horribly. He told all the family he couldn't get time off work and nobody has ever said a word about it.

OP I understand how you feel but it sounds to me as if you're pissed off about going to the wedding full stop. The fact it is on a Monday is almost irrelevant.

AaahhwoooooOOOOooOOOOo1 · 19/10/2018 13:15

I don’t get 28 days. Not everybody does

Anything less is breaking the law, isn’t it? (Assuming 8 of the 28 are Bank Holidays)

MrsVietor · 19/10/2018 13:15

But the OP is clearly an extremely close member of family to one of the people getting married. It could be one of her parents remarrying. So not expecting a 'command performance' but just a person who wants their daughter's blessing. (I'm guessing obviously, but just thinking it through to give a kinder interpretation).

Lacey31 · 19/10/2018 13:17

A Monday is better than a midweek day though- you will need less time off work and I've been invited to some Tuesday and Thursday weddings- they're a real pain. Not really a party vibe on a Monday though.

AdorableMisfit · 19/10/2018 13:19

I got married on a Monday. It meant I had the weekend to prepare (I did my own food and made my own cake, to save money, so we could spend it on our honeymoon instead) and it also fit best with flights to our honeymoon destination the following day.

underneaththeash · 19/10/2018 13:19

Oddly I was just about to post a similar comment to PP. Mondays are not IMO going out celebrating days and the Monday wedding we went to a couple of years ago just didn't feel very special.

LaDaronne · 19/10/2018 13:19

I not only got married on a Monday, it was also in a different country. Clearly I'm the most selfish bride ever Grin Well meh, we told people over a year ahead, they made plans, and everyone who mattered was happy to come.

OhLemons · 19/10/2018 13:24

I got married on a Wednesday, for no other reason than we wanted to. Our venue wasn't any cheaper and we would have had no problem with people being unable or unwilling to attend.

ProfessorMoody · 19/10/2018 13:24

Mondays are not IMO going out celebrating days and the Monday wedding we went to a couple of years ago just didn't feel very special

What an utterly bizarre comment. So couples who marry on the weekend are more special? Deserve more celebration? Do you feel the same about babies born on weekdays, as Mondays aren't special enough? Confused

PennyMordauntsLadyBrain · 19/10/2018 13:24

I agree @MulticolourMophead , I just mean for most people who’d been told well in advance it would be a case of losing the days from that years allowance, rather than OP specifically.

craftymum01 · 19/10/2018 13:26

I got married on a Monday. Christmas wedding and it was the closest day we could get without it being actually Christmas. A couple of people couldn't come because of work. I understood as it was my decision to get married on a Monday. Luckily most of my friends work in education so were on holiday.

Tomorrowillbeachicken · 19/10/2018 13:26

Better than a Wednesday tbh

Somersetlady · 19/10/2018 13:27

Ive been to a Monday wedding on a bank holiday! It was awful. Half the room left early and lots of people were not up for dancing and partying as were driving and leaving at a reasonable time.

For this reason alone if I got a Monday invite i would be very ‘meh’ about it.

I dont think the bride and groom noticed how flat the room was and lacking in atmosphere they were so wrapped up in their love bubble and rightly so.

PennyMordauntsLadyBrain · 19/10/2018 13:30

What an utterly bizarre comment. So couples who marry on the weekend are more special? Deserve more celebration? Do you feel the same about babies born on weekdays, as Mondays aren't special enough?

I get what that poster meant- I’ve been to a few midweek weddings over the last two years and they definitely have a different atmosphere than the weekend dos.

Thinly attended, those who did show up weren’t drinking and made a bit of a show of it, guests clock watching because they had work the next day and the parties ended fairly early as people snuck off.

I’m sure there’s just as many that go on to the early hours and guests had a great time, but for the social circle of the couples’ who’s midweek weddings I’ve been to, it just didn’t work out like that.

mathsquestions · 19/10/2018 13:37

They're inviting you cos they have to.
You're going cos you have to.

What's the point?

huggybear · 19/10/2018 13:38

It's selfish, that's what it is. It smacks of self importance. Friday is bad but at least there's the weekend to recover but a Monday? If you can't afford a bells and whistles wedding, have a smaller one, don't expect your guests to pick up the tab.

YetAnotherThing · 19/10/2018 13:41

I’m with you OP. Unless your pals are all shiftworkers, people relax more and enjoy weekend weddings. I’d find it hard to unwind on a Monday afternoon, knowing there’s a 3 hr drive. Agree that, on the whole, you’re just passing costs on to your guests in terms of lost annual leave. If it’s about reducing costs, agree go smaller at a weekend.

sweeneytoddsrazor · 19/10/2018 13:42

@huggybear people do work weekends you know

Bluelady · 19/10/2018 13:42

Weddings are inherently selfish, aren't they? Nobody gets married for their guests' benefit. The last one I went to was miserable, no thought had been given to guests' comfort at all.

Ifoundanacorn · 19/10/2018 13:43

If it is a close family member then I think it would be kinder not to go, you are clearly not very happy about the marriage or the day. Unless you are a very good actress (and you are not doing a good impression at the moment) You will have to bail out to protect their day.

If the bride and groom are annoyed, and deem it essential that you are there then they should have asked you first if the date would work for you.

The alternative is to do the decent thing, be cheerful about the small inconvenience that is the biggest day of their lives and be happy for them.

huggybear · 19/10/2018 13:44

I know some people work at the weekend but they are in the minority.

LeftRightCentre · 19/10/2018 13:47

What an utterly bizarre comment. So couples who marry on the weekend are more special? Deserve more celebration? Do you feel the same about babies born on weekdays, as Mondays aren't special enough?

Yep, pretty much. Compelling guests to take time off work so you can save money is crap, just elope then. Not really comparable with babies as they usually come when they're ready and one's birthday moves days every year Hmm

I don't really get having a big ol' wedding for second/third/whatever marriages anyhow, a la Meghan Markle all tacky dressed in a big white dress again making vows she already broke to another bloke like a blushing bride (you gotta wonder how much the royals paid her first husband to keep this mouth shut).

serbska · 19/10/2018 13:48

99.99999% of my friends work Monday to Friday. Actually I can't think fo a single person who works who doesn't do M-F

So for me and my friends, this would be a real ball ache taking M and T off work for a wedding.

Obviously if you work in hospitality, emergency services, medics, theater, retail etc etc etc and your friendship group is comprised of similar, M weddings are probably easier to make.

Elementtree · 19/10/2018 13:48

Gosh, you have a lot of friends.