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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would you fancy you OH if you met him now?

229 replies

LolaPickle · 06/10/2018 16:16

When we first met - ten years ago ,my husband looked and acted VERY different, he was up for a laugh, looked very very different and was much more outgoing. Now he is the opposite of what i would find attractive and is very different socially / takes life very seriously

Would you still fancy you OH if you met him today?

OP posts:
Stonebake · 07/10/2018 10:07

Sorry, need a comma^^.

DollyWilde · 07/10/2018 10:08

More so. He was a wet eared 26 when I met him. He’s now 32 and is really growing into his looks. I’m exceedingly jealous. I look pretty much the same as when we met except 2 stone heavier Envy

chestylarue52 · 07/10/2018 10:10

Stonebake - how has he made your life different? Just curious as you sound quite sad about it

Stonebake · 07/10/2018 10:14

I am a bit tbh. We live near his work, which is also near his family. His family don’t really like me and it’s got to a point where I just don’t want to be around them at all. We also had to move around a lot with his job when we first graduated (we met in first year of university), so my career never really happened.

I’ve sort of accepted we’re never leaving this area now and am trying to cut out a little life for myself here, separate from just being a wife and mum. It will take some time though and it makes me sad that I have no friends or family here to share my young children with. They’re so funny and entertaining but there’s nobody to enjoy them with except dh at weekends. I’m in a bad mood today though and am perfectly cheerful about it some days.

Thanks for asking Flowers.

Stonebake · 07/10/2018 10:15

I think I mean “carve out” not “cut out”.

AwaAnBileYeHeid · 07/10/2018 10:15

Oh yes. 15 years on and he's just as hot as the day we met (seriously, he's hardly aged and it makes me look so much worse in comparison!) and has grown into an amazing person. When we met he was a very nice but naive guy who was completely looked after by and pandered to by his mum. She did EVERYTHING.
Now we have three kids and he is just as capable of looking after the kids and house as me. He is a fully functioning adult and a great husband and father.

MarthasGinYard · 07/10/2018 10:17

No

Didn't fancy him that much when we met either.

However, he has a huge cock and a large wallet.

BlessedBeTheFruitCake · 07/10/2018 10:18

Yes, I think so. Dh has put on some weight but after dc so have I. He's still attractive and aging really well, he gets told he looks 10yrs younger all the time. I on the other hand am not aging so well so I'm not sure he'd say the same.

hungryhippo90 · 07/10/2018 10:18

No, I don’t think I would. His teeth make me want to heave. He has a build up of almost brown plaque on his bottom teeth, I’ve been nagging him to go to the dentist so they can remove it, he doesn’t see it as important and we no longer kiss.

After being fairly scathing about my weight he has put on 10kg in the past year and he simply doesn’t care.

And given his recent shopping sprees, I wouldn’t be seen with him in the sort of clothes he would choose to wear now. Lilac shirts with blue birds on them, yellow shorts, red shoes and burgundy chinos- not all one outfit I might add, and pink polos with pineapples on.

No ta. This feels like a really horrible post.

C0untDucku1a · 07/10/2018 10:21

Hippo does he know how you feel about his teeth and still wont see a dentist? Could he be depressed if he has just stopped caring?

lostlondoner · 07/10/2018 10:25

Ha haha!! Mine is still sexy yes but totally get the miserable bastard thing - that's what is putting me off. He used to be so care free but two kids down and a stressful job not so much. I'm probably a miserable cow too though.

Orchiddingme · 07/10/2018 10:27

So funny how all the husbands on MN are aging so well, twice as handsome when they are older, all 'silver foxes' but the women are going downhill...

I meet a hell of a lot of middle-aged men in my work, and whilst one or two might still have it, most haven't! They just look like ordinary middle-aged men. Luckily their wives are flagellating themselves for putting on weight after childbirth and still see them as as hot as heck!

TheCakeDiet · 07/10/2018 10:28

No.

SoyDora · 07/10/2018 10:31

I don’t fancy DH more because he’s ‘aged well’. In reality he’s aged much worse than me... he’s almost entirely grey whereas I have yet to find my first grey hair and he certainly looks more ‘weathered’. I’ve had 2 children and pregnant with a third and while I’ve put on a bit of weight I’m certainly not self flagellating and I don’t think he cares either.
I fancy him more because I know him better! We’ve been through so much and he has been there every step of the way. He adores our children so much and absolutely does as much for them (and me) as he can. That’s what makes him more attractive to me.

GoingNuckingFuts · 07/10/2018 10:31

absolutely, if anything i fancy him more, he was 28 when i met him he is 36 now, he has aged slightly few greys and a little wrinkle here and there but it suits him, he is more serious but in a good way he still makes me laugh everyday, only now its not with as many jokes its normally getting something are over tit! he is definitely like a fine wine and improving with age and he was lush when i met him!

trevthecat · 07/10/2018 10:33

We met as teens. Now in our 30s and I fancy him more now than ever!

PavlovaFaith · 07/10/2018 10:52

Yes, we started going out at 17 and still together at 30-31. He's gorgeous Grin

Villainelle · 07/10/2018 10:56

Yeah. He might be a knobhead, but he's my knobhead.

batshite1 · 07/10/2018 10:57

Physically I’m very attracted to DH as hes my type (tall, dark & handsome) but he’s approaching his late 30s & I’ve definitely noticed more moaning, negativity creep in which pisses me off. His friends are doing similar (we have been together since late teens) & the mid life crisis appears to be true.

Yogagirl123 · 07/10/2018 11:01

Yes!

Toughtips · 07/10/2018 11:03

Yes. He's hotter now than when I met him. He gets better with age

ShizeItsWeegie · 07/10/2018 11:12

Yep. He's covered in surgical scars and has lost entire organs due to the big C. Has lost loads of weight and gone grey as a badger but I never look at anyone else ever. He is the only one for me. I love him to bits.

MrsJBaptiste · 07/10/2018 11:14

Unfortunately men do age better than women though - grey hair is distinguished on a man, awful on a woman, men often have fewer wrinkles in later life and can pretty much keep their dress sense and hairstyles but look at all the 70+ year olds with short, grey perms!

elQuintoConyo · 07/10/2018 11:15

Most definitely. Still got the broad shoulders, laid-back attitude and Dublin lilt. He is a man, has always been a man not a mummy's boy or an immature asshat.

I'm the baggy-round-the-edges silver fox, he's the bald fox!

DwangelaForever · 07/10/2018 11:18

Hubby is most deffo more attractive now at nearly thirty than he was when I met him at 18 Grin

Two kids later I don't think he got the good side of the sea haha but that's a different story!