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Original poster

Would you fancy you OH if you met him now?

229 replies

LolaPickle · 06/10/2018 16:16

When we first met - ten years ago ,my husband looked and acted VERY different, he was up for a laugh, looked very very different and was much more outgoing. Now he is the opposite of what i would find attractive and is very different socially / takes life very seriously

Would you still fancy you OH if you met him today?

OP posts:
Everyoneiswingingit · 06/10/2018 18:55

where and ferrier it is not the norm and it shouldn't be! We still have great sex in our late 40s! Better than in our 20s actually! if you don't look forward to seeing your DH then things need to change,

TaylorSwiftMakesMyShitItch · 06/10/2018 19:02

Absolutely. He's bloody gorgeous, and hotter than when we met. He's gained weight (was a bit skinny at first), he's got a sprinkling of grey, dresses well, always smells great...

Definitely improving with age.

SixToEightInchesOfSnow · 06/10/2018 19:02

Nope. He foul, moody, angry and miserable. He doesn’t like anybody and people are starting to not like him either. Then they lump us together and therefore don’t like me. He’s either at work where one of his collegues describes him as “one of the nicest men they know” 🤷‍♀️ or sat in from of the TV. He’s materialistic and is never happy with his lot, he asleays wants the next thing. He opts out of family life and he never does anything for himself. He has absolutely nothing to talk about except to bitch about people. He’s actually been quite nice these past few weeks and it’s been lovely but today he’s back to his horrible self. Tbh I don’t really care what he looks like I can hardly look at him.

LuluJakey1 · 06/10/2018 19:09

Well he still looks attractive and I still fancy him, he's still the best kisser and we still do a lot of kissing.

He is more serious about work because he is a Headteacher now and was a couple of years into teaching when we met. But he's still very funny and becoming a dad has been the making of him. I can't be doing with huffs and neither of us huff. He is really silly and funny still at home and makes me laugh. Could do with losing a bit of weight but that was true when we met and so could I. He's become quite a cool dresser as he's got older and now he's stopped wearing football shirts.
Drives me mad at times but he's kind, funny, loving, likes a good discussion argument clever, decent and generous. So yes.

LuluJakey1 · 06/10/2018 19:11

He does get bogged down in work and exhausted by it at times and I hate it when it comes first. We fall out about that occasionally.

VillageCats · 06/10/2018 19:23

I think it would be interesting if people said how many children they have and roughly what ages. We started out madly in love but two stepkids and two kids later and the cracks are showing. Our youngest is 2 and we still compete in the tired Olympic s which is wearing. I could have easily divorced him when our eldest was 1 but I swore I wouldn't until he was 3 because I knew how stressful the early years are. I'm hoping when the kids get a bit older we can really enjoy each other and not find there's nothing left.

Iputthescrewinthetuna · 06/10/2018 19:31

Ooh yes, I was actually talking about this at work!
DP is starting to go grey, I find myself really looking forward to a full head coverage as it seems to really suit him.
I still find myself looking at him when he is watching tv and think 'wow, he is just wow'

SoyDora · 06/10/2018 19:33

I think it would be interesting if people said how many children they have and roughly what ages

2 children, aged 4 and 3 and pregnant with a third. I think how fantastic he is with the DC is what makes me fancy him more!

IFeelSorryForMillie · 06/10/2018 19:55

yes I would.

20 years together, silvering and slightly thicker set, his sense humour is just the same and quick witted, he's still thoughtful caring and surprises me things.

In those 20 years we've had our ups and downs though, and even separated for 6 months too.

DC are in there teens.

Tohaveandtohold · 06/10/2018 20:04

Yes absolutely. I met him when he was 21, we were young, broke and still in the university. 11 years later, been married for 7 (a 5yo and pregnant with no 2) but he’s changed a lot and it’s all a change for good. Looks after himself, active, a good dad &husband, definitely fancy him more.

Banana770 · 06/10/2018 20:06

Yes definitely! He’s still the loveliest guy I know.

NoTeaNoShadeNoPinkLemonade · 06/10/2018 20:08

physically yes...not sure about the rest

ElspethTascioni · 06/10/2018 20:10

As others have said - I think I fancy him more! He’s so hot, I love him...😍

supersop60 · 06/10/2018 20:13

If I didn't have to live with him, I probably would find him attractive.

Digestive28 · 06/10/2018 20:20

Yep. Absolutely, he’s the one I chose and would continue to choose and lily he chose me in return.
But not sure he would fancy me right now as I’m sat in my pyjamas watching tv feeling hungover with greasy hair! I was better dressed in our first meeting. Luckily he’s away and I’ll recover before his return...

lulu12345 · 06/10/2018 20:21

Am really surprised by reading these answers.. to be honest I thought everyone stopped fancying their other halves over time Blush

I feel awful saying it but I wouldn't want to get with my husband if we met now. We've been together 11 years. Can't say why.. looks wise he's probably actually in better physical shape now. I just did him extremely boring and he has been pretty rubbish with me and children since they were born.. just not that interested in them, doesn't make an effort. It has massively put me off him. Genuinely can't imagine ever wanting to have sex with him again.

SoyDora · 06/10/2018 20:23

Genuinely can't imagine ever wanting to have sex with him again

Have you thought about leaving?

mindutopia · 06/10/2018 20:24

Yes, actually I think more so. We were a bit young and silly back then. I find him so interesting and attractive now, more so probably than we met, even after two kids and a lot of years and water under this bridge.

BluebellCockleshell123 · 06/10/2018 20:27

Damn right. He's even hotter now than he was 25 years ago.

Busybusybust · 06/10/2018 20:28

I doubt it. He’s been dead for 23 years😁

HettieBettie · 06/10/2018 20:29

Nope wouldn’t fancy him but woul fall in love with him all over again

Singlebutmarried · 06/10/2018 20:29

Mine still looks damn fine in a suit and has THE best eyes

So yes.

He’s a dick sometimes but he’s my dick.

lulu12345 · 06/10/2018 20:29

Have you thought about leaving?

Yes, often. I've suggested it to him but he doesn't want to. I don't hate him, he's not u mind, just like a sort of vaguely irritating housemate who shares (a bit of) the load with the children in terms of care and finances. I would struggle financially and practically if I left him, and I think the children will be better off having him around more. They are both still really young (under 1 and 3) and I'm hoping that when they're older and more self sufficient our love may re-grow, or if not I'll at least be able to have more time on my own away from him.

Catnut · 06/10/2018 20:34

Yes! I think I fancy him even more now that I know what an amazing dad he is to our little boy. I previously had a 14 year marriage where I constantly wondered why I didn't feel fulfilled and whether there was someone more suitable out there, so I feel very lucky and grateful to have the relationship that I have with my OH now.

Everyoneiswingingit · 06/10/2018 20:39

lulu that's really sad but you have very young chn. Maybe you need to carve out a bit more time for your relationship. Can you get a babysitter and try dating again?

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