To think this “hilarious” card is actually depressing?

[Decanter]

lovelayladesigns.co.uk/Cards/Anniversary_Cards/up-the-bum.html

I have 2 DDs and hate how this kind of crap is being normalised. Fucking hilarious Layla

I think this has less to do with what consenting adults are free to get up to in the privacy of the own bedrooms (of which anal sex probably falls towards the less outré end), and more to do with the normalisation of messaging to young people.

Greeting cards are there for everyone to see - uncensored and freely available.

I support any adult's wish to buy this for a friend and see the humour therein.

I can't say I'd be delighted with some impressionable teenage lad coming across it, on the other hand. Certainly not one that might cross paths with my DD.

Also, if anal sex is done correctly - slowly, preparation, lots of lube, safe words, STI checks, consent etc. then it significantly reduces the chance of damage.

Exactly.

Unfortunately, most teenage girls on the receiving end of some spotty lad, keen to get his end away via this particular method, won't have this sort of care and consideration taken of their sexual wellbeing.

It won't even occur to said lad, given the sort of exposure they'll have had to anal sex (read: porn).

I mean, the message is - 'no harm done', right....?

That's the real problem.

@ICJump I also understand it as another ways of saying cheers.

Clinks tankard with friend.

"Up your bum!"

Oh yes it has that meaning too :)

Oh God, MN, thanks for telling us what kinds of sex are "normal" and what types we don't want "normalised". Listen to yourselves. It's oppressive.

It's a from a rhyme - up the bum, no harm done, up the fanny, your mum's a granny. Not that I'd buy that card

I’ve got no problem with adults having consensual anal sex if they want to, but I agree there’s a pretty disasteful undertone to this.

If it's consensual why would he need to argue 'no harm done' ?

Why are we saying it's a "he?" That's the type of card my female friend would have sent me on my teen years and I would have laughed. And no, I don't like anal. Hate it in fact. It's also the type of card DPs cousin would give to their own mum, just for a reaction.

"One up the bum, no harm done" was around as a saying when I was young - so at least 30 years ago. It's a reference to lack of pregnancy.

Not sure you could blame "porn influence" from back then tbh. People have been having anal sex from time immemorial.

On first glance I assume that the card is from the woman to the man and she's giving him permission for anal?

But why the need to send a card about it?? Who sends cards about their sex life? Can you imagine having it up in the living room when your mum comes round

"One up the bum, no harm done" was around as a saying when I was young - so at least 30 years ago. It's a reference to lack of pregnancy.

I was coming on to say this, I heard this phrase in the 80s & it was about avoiding an unwanted baby.

Anal sex causes cancer?

This rhyme isn't new, I remember friends jokingly saying it in the early 1990's. The card company haven't made it up, they've just put it on a card for people with a different sense of humour.

It is vulgar and puerile.

dowager exactly. If people want to do it, fair play, but obviously it's not ok if dippy teenagers (or immature adults) who just want to stick it up there or who pressure girls into doing it.

boopsy People have been having anal sex for centuries, it's not some modern invention. Of course they should be doing it because they want to, and with no pressure, but you can say that about any and every sexual act.

I mean, it's not a card I would buy these days but maybe in my early 20s I would have found it amusing.

I don't see the humour. If anal sex is normal, then why is it a source of amusement? I can't imagine who would send it, and to whom.

Clearly its for a certain market of people with that sort of humour?

lovelayladesigns.co.uk/Cards/Birthday_Cards/April_Cunt

TBH, f you have smidgen of taste, why would you even be looking at a site like that, other than to be mortally offended ?

Ffs there are greetings cards for all different sense of humours. This thread is ridiculous and offensive. I can't believe some people's views on anal sex!

As pp have said, it's an old saying and refers to not getting pregnant from anal sex. Nothing to do with rape, porn etc.

This must be shocking for some- that some people have a different sense of humour and different likes and dislikes.

Some people even have different sexual preferences and like anal sex. Who knew?

MacosieAsunter I'm getting that for dh!! He would definitely find that hilarious.

macosie that's lovely, I think I'll get that for my mum.

I actually think HQ should ban posters linking retail sites on here. It’s free advertising and the owner of the company could be starting the threads. ( not saying the op of this thread is the owner of the card company but generally speaking )

The card is crass btw.

It’s like the gathering of the Perpetually Offended on this thread. Some of the comments about anal and HIV are horrifically ignorant.

Anal sex isn’t a ‘porn thing’, it has been around since ancient times. Not everyone (women or men) enjoy it, but I would imagine referring to it as ‘not normal’ is quite offensive in this day and age to those who do.

If we merely to shrug our shoulders and say "Ah well, people like different things," there will never be any debate on the internet.

Could I go off point for a second and ask what is the story about anal sex? I tried it a few times and it was the most horrendously painful experience. Why and how do gay men like this?