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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think this “hilarious” card is actually depressing?

698 replies

Decanter · 05/10/2018 00:55

lovelayladesigns.co.uk/Cards/Anniversary_Cards/up-the-bum.html

I have 2 DDs and hate how this kind of crap is being normalised. Fucking hilarious Layla Hmm

OP posts:
CantSleepClownsWillEatMe · 05/10/2018 01:36

Decanter there are certainly lots of pressures on young girls but this is an online card company, in the anniversary section, so I would say it's clearly aimed at couples. I think it's pretty unlikely that a boy/man looking for anal is going to browse on line searching for just the right card to convince a young girl that it's normal and cool!

Poetry it ain't and it certainly wouldn't be on the mantlepiece in my house but I can't see what you're seeing. It's a smutty card which appeals to some people's sense of humour just as "toilet humour" appeals to some.

FoldyRoll · 05/10/2018 01:36

Don't worry OP, increased web traffic means fuck all if it doesn't convert to sales, newsletter sign ups, social media follows etc. In this case, I suspect it won't.

helacells · 05/10/2018 01:38

In what world is anal normal? I've never met any woman who says she likes it.

dontgobaconmyheart · 05/10/2018 01:39

Don't shoot the messenger, to clarify, I find that the opposite of hilarious and really pretty puerile and tiresome -but by utterly odd and grim coincidence I think I know what this is potentially supposed to be.
I was told by someone I know this week that the saying "one up the bum no harm done, one up the fanny, your mum's a granny" is in fact a thing. So i assume its a shortening of that and refers to avoiding pregnancy- but regardless it's grim, and without context just insinuates issues with consent. I hope they take it off of sale.
God knows where or in what circles you run that it is a saying but he was adamant it was a hilarious well known turn of phrase. What kind of adults are sending this childish crap to one another?

Original poster
Decanter · 05/10/2018 01:40

I agree it’s porn influence CallMeRachel.

OP posts:
slashlover · 05/10/2018 01:42

I've both bought and received cards from that site, although not the one linked. You have to know your audience though.

StillMe1 · 05/10/2018 01:42

This reply has been deleted

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Original poster
Decanter · 05/10/2018 01:46

Could well be in reference to something like that Don’tGo. I’ve never heard of that.

As for the kind of adults who are sending these cards to one another, they are probably the same adults whose adolescences were flavoured by this kind of message Sad

OP posts:
ineedtostopbeingsolazy · 05/10/2018 01:50

What are you going on about StillMe Confused
Anal sex is perfectly fine and normal between two consenting adults.
And what the fuck are you on about HIV is a homosexual disease ! Words fail me.

Don't have anal sex no one cares what you do or don't do, you should try to do the same.

Original poster
Decanter · 05/10/2018 01:56

StillMe1 yep that’s it exactly. Likewise I’d wonder about anyone who would want to take the risk of inflicting that type of damage on a person or allowing that damage to be inflicted upon themselves. Young woman and men will do all sorts of risky and unhealthy crap to themselves though if it’s what the in-crowd says is cool. The normalising of anal sex (and hint at lack of consent) is hugely irresponsible.

OP posts:
Haahhpy · 05/10/2018 01:58

Callmerachel how the hell would you know?! Most "circles" don't openly discuss their sexial activities to that degree of detail! I think regularly telling your mates what you got up to in the sack is way weirder than anal tbh.

To me it's just a funny quote from a comedy show. It's a well known line said by a comically chauvanistic plonker in The Office and I think it's more aimed at people who have a shared love of comedy to buy for one another, as opposed to people with a shared love of anal sex 🙄

SpitefulMidLifeAnimal · 05/10/2018 01:58

A (admittedly rather crude) gay male friend of mine says this all the time. Think I've just found his birthday card. Cheers OP!

Greggers2017 · 05/10/2018 02:07

These cards are for people with a
Different sense of humour to yours. I'd rather have one like that than a shitty one with flowers and a nauseating verse in. I just like different things.
If you don't like it don't buy from love Layla. Simple!

BabySharkAteMyHamster · 05/10/2018 02:08

That card could just as easily be bought for on half of a gay couple.........plenty of people have and enjoy anal sex.

I really can't get my knickers in a knot over what complete strangers choose to do or don't choose to do with their arses.

CantSleepClownsWillEatMe · 05/10/2018 02:13

Oh ffs this thread is insane Shock. It's fine to not have anal sex, I'm not the biggest fan myself (seeing as we're all sharing apparently Hmm) but it's also fine for people who do enjoy it!

It's two lines on a card people, the context will presumably be known to the giver and recipient. It doesn't require a lengthy disclaimer to explain that the giver isn't promoting rape, it's not a motto stenciled on the walls of your dds school to "pressure" them into anything and oh my fucking God StillMe I don't even know where to start with your comments though I see Op is quick enough to agree with you.

There is something very wrong with quite a few posters here.

Jlynhope · 05/10/2018 02:18

I think it's fine. It's not promoting anal sex (although even if it was who cares?) and I hardly see it as promoting rape. I myself am a rape victim and I hardly think my rapist is going to shop for a card like this in an anniversary section at a store and drop this round to me.

StillMe1 · 05/10/2018 02:21

Ineedtostop You may think anal sex is normal with hetrosexual couples. I dont. I would not take part in that activity. I dont consider it my business what people do sexually as long as I am not involved.
AIDS SEEMED at first to be a homosexual disease because of damage to the anus during penetration. It was later found to be transmitted by body fluids.
I wish you had read my post properly before commenting. I said SEEMED. You desperate assertion that anal sex is normal suggests that perhaps you are not as comfortable with it as you thought or perhaps you feel the need to take part in order to be part of the in crowd.

StillMe1 · 05/10/2018 02:27

FYI The AIDS research started more than 50 years ago so quite likely before a lot of MNs were even born. There was a lot involved in the research including sex with amimals apes mostly.

slashlover · 05/10/2018 02:30

Have anal sex, don't have anal sex, it's entirely up to the individual. I have friends who have tried it, some enjoyed it, some didn't

Also, if anal sex is done correctly - slowly, preparation, lots of lube, safe words, STI checks, consent etc. then it significantly reduces the chance of damage.

CantSleepClownsWillEatMe · 05/10/2018 02:35

Stillme whether you would "take part in that activity" is irrelevant. Protesting about the existence of this card on the basis that it's about rape/pressuring young girls or anything to do with AIDS is crazy and I'm boggled at the mental gymnastics required to twist six words on a card the way some posters have.

There's another one there that reads I love you with all of my boobs. You could just as easily argue that this promotes groping and is anti breastfeeding because it sexualizes breasts rather than celebrates their nutrient providing wonder! I mean it'd be a load of bollox but hey, why let that stop you?

slashlover · 05/10/2018 02:36

There was a lot involved in the research including sex with amimals apes mostly.

What?

JellieEllie · 05/10/2018 02:37

I don't see where this card is offensive at all? Like other pps have said, each to their own.
Still me I expect you find that people sucking someone's genitals and swallowing their semen, or licking someone's bum hole, or using plastic toys (either man or woman) to pleasure themselves is also extremely unnatural too then ?
Why are you so bothered what other people's kicks are? Some people are just naturally very kinky when it comes to sex.
Next you will be saying you don't masturbate 🙄

CantSleepClownsWillEatMe · 05/10/2018 02:38

Have we moved on to bestiality Shock Shock?

slashlover · 05/10/2018 02:43

The 'someone had sex with a monkey' was debunked when I was at school 25 years ago. It's much more likely that a monkey was killed and eaten which allowed the virus to make the species jump.

ICJump · 05/10/2018 02:56

In Aussie slang “up your bum” is a polite way of saying “fuck off”. Not sure if what that makes the card better or worse.