AIBU to think SAHM isn't an artist if she doesn't produce art?

[windygallows]

Woman I know has been a SAHM for 25 years but refuses to be called a SAHM and instead claims to be/wants to be called an artist.

Her artistry is more like a hobby that she does every few months. She has built a studio in her backyard to produce art but isn't there much. She has never sold her work, never had a show, never been part of a group show, never had an open house, doesn't have a website. Of course you don't need to do these things to be an artist, but I think producing work is key!

Her DH is part of a sort of posh 'cultural milieu' and I'm sure claiming she's an artist because it's a more acceptable title but come on - can you be an artist if you don't produce art, just like are you a writer if you don't or rarely write or a musician if you don't or haven't produced music?

I don't define myself at all and find no reason to label myself
I tell people what I do if they ask, but otherwise I'm a woman of mystery
Every day is different full of variables and moods, it's great to just be

You're awesome :)

niugboo
If someone asks what you do and you say doctor when you're not then it's inaccurate.

I'm qualified in another line of work from before I joined teaching but I wouldn't say hi I'm Maisy and I'm a 'former role'. Just like if I took a career break from teaching for a.few years say 'hi I'm a teacher' because that would also be inaccurate. ' I'm on a career break from teaching' would suffice without needing to hide the fact that I'm on a career break.
Nobody I know who's left teaching to stay at home or pursue new avenues describes themselves as a teacher when they arent actually teaching. I'd assume that's the case for other lines of work.

Good for her. Sometimes 'naming' yourself as the job/person you're aiming to be is half the battle. Why not call yourself an artist (or inventor, or scientist, or baker) if you enjoy and aspire to be one of those. Who cares if you do it infrequently or badly. Most people I know who have a paid 'job" are fairly rubbish at it too!

Not really your business, windywillows.

What difference does it make to you ?!
Like i always say "worse things happen at sea"& tbf it's not really any of your business anyway is it?^

I work in contemporary art. Sorry, OP, your ignorance is showing, as well as your sneer. There are so many ways to be an artist and not all of them are immediately obvious. Perhaps you could shimmy your way into their cultural milieu by asking her if she's a social sculptor.

I don't think Van Gogh sold a painting in his whole life.... Was he an artist? 🤔

I'm sorry but your post implies you are the one with the problem.

I think doctors never really cease to be doctors even if they aren't working. If I was having a heart attack on a plane and someone shouted out, "Is there is a doctor onboard?" I certainly wouldn't be worried about when they last got a pay cheque in the role of doctor. If they had qualified as a doctor at some point - let them at me!

I am still intrigued as to why the dh is even mentioning what his dw does, how does that possibly come up so often that it is irratating?

Are we not all artists in one way or another?

She might be someone who's hit a brick wall when it comes to making art, and her DH is boosting her confidence by referring to her as an artist. I've worked many many menial, manual, bottom-of-the-heap jobs but always introduced myself as an artist, because that's what I am. The OP is being mean.

Why is she a SAHM? She doesn't say she is.
She says she's an artist.
Maybe they can afford for her to just enjoy being artistic.
How lovely.

Was this person an artist before being a SAHM? Perhaps that's why the reference to being an artist. Or her ambition is to be one and her DH keeps this alive by his reference to "the artist". Who knows. I have never referred to anyone as a SAHM or been addressed as one.

So she's a sahm for 25 years is she? Surely if her kids are all grown up the sahm status is gone? How do you know she doesn't produce art? I doubt her husband has told you that. He's very posh, and earns lots of money, but your colleagues? What your saying sounds a bit fishy to me. My advice would be to mind your own business, you sound incredibly jealous to spend part of your day posting this on Mumsnet..
Her husband and her sound very happy, and that bothers you doesn't it. Focus on your own life and maybe you'll be as happy as them won't you? I'm sure she sells a lot of art from that 'shed in the back garden'

I call myself a writer though I am yet to get published and don't get the chance to write everyday. Weeks go past sometimes!

It's still my primary focus outside home / kids so whether I get paid or not doesn't make a difference to what I 'call myself'.