Bit shaken. Aibu to be?

[duchessofsussedsex]

I've just been to Sainsbury's. I was in the fruit aisle and there was a lady and her teenager by the apples I wanted. I waited a while until they were done (they were inspecting each packet for a while) and as they were moving off I reached over and took a packet. I pretty certain I wasn't in their personal space but as I had waited a while I did swoop in a bit.

The woman shouted "stupid bitch" after me and I turned round and said "excuse me" and she incredibly angrily said "you heard". I said "what's your problem" and her teenager proceeded to come and get right up in my face (o could feel spit) and start shouting at me never to speak to her mother like that and that I needed to speak to her. She repeated this at least 10 times and every time I said "I am speaking to you - what exactly is the problem here". The only other thing she said was "ill give you a problem if you don't back off". No other answer at all. I was nothing but polite as it was a busy public place. I the. walked off and she kept shouting "stupid bitch" after me.

I just carried on for a few mins and then I just started shaking and crying and had to abandon the basket and leave. Lots of people witnessed this and nobody said a word.

I'm over 30 years old and I've been reduced to tears by a teenager. I feel so pathetic. I'm just sat in the car crying. I really don't think o did anything wrong. Aibu or are people really this unbelievably nasty and, in the case of everyone else, passive in this day and age and I need to suck it up?

YANBU they sound like the kind of people that go out waiting to get in fight with people. You did nothing wrong. I'd have been upset and intimidated too.

What a couple of neds

"Well, what did she think would happen if she was alone with a man..." ... "Well, if she didn't want it she should have fought and screamed until he stopped..." "Well, she was obviously giving off misleading signals, can't blame him for thinking she wanted it..." "Well, she's clearly just fishing for sympathy because it didn't go her way and now she regrets it..." Same old bullshit.

I'm surprised you waited two minutes. I'd have said excuse me and just reached past them, then been on my way. They probably thought you were being passive aggressive by standing there watching them. But in future, when faced with aggressive idiots, do not engage. You can't win against that mentality unless by punching them into submission. Which puts you at risk of needing to defend yourself in court. Leave well enough alone next time.

I'm sorry for what happened to you. You did not deserve that. Remember that they probably have spoken to others like that today. Next time walk away and report to security.

These two self appointed morons had no self control or sense of decency and were clearly looking for a fight. Its not your fault that this happened to you. I hope you are feeling better now. OP - you are not to blame at all, not even slightly. I would also go back to that Sainsburys and see their store manager about his matter asap.

Don't concern yourself with the opinions of pork

((Hugs.)) I had a similar experience on a train when I was accompanying a group of foreign students. We were only travelling one stop. The train was busy and crowded. 4 yobs-2 female and 2 male vebally attacked the students with horrendous racist/sexist remarks.I intervened politely and then was threatened by all 4. Called a *ing paedophile c**.Screamed at repeatedly by them. Stood my ground and when I got off the train went to report them. Had to physically back away as one female was threatening to kick my head in etc. Let her have the last word then tried to report it but no-one at the railway station seemed that bothered.. I was fine until a fellow passenger asked me if I was ok and then I fell apart! Think it was the shock at realising what absolute lowlifes exist.(The students were all fine thankfully.)

I would have gone with "Security, Help, Security"

Yanbu. I teach and unfortunately behind most unreasonable thuggish, loud kid, is an equally unreasonable, thuggish parent. They probably walked away really proud of themselves. They will not at all see anything wrong in what they have done. Like p.p. said, if they're horrible enough to insult you without reason, they are not the sort of people you want to engage with - walk away. Go to security if necessary. People like this are not normal - their values are not like most of us and they will never change

Common twats,,I think i would have got upset too OP. They dont sound normal

That sounds awful OP i'm not surprised you were shaken up. Hope you're feeling better this evening

Yanbu to be shaken. Sorry you had to experience that. The teenager sounds like a bully, one day she will meet her match

They’ve clearly got moral or behavioural issues. They’re looking for a fight. I’d prob look at em a bit funny & walk away/not engage if they started on me, & report them to store staff. You never know what they have going on & it’s not worth letting them get to you psychologically or physically close enough to hurt you. Horrid experience.

Some people are just like that
I was browsing an aisle and stepped back, less than half a pace to view something better
Woman behind me "come here" (to her child) "that stupid bitch nearly sent you flying"
"You can always tell the people that don't have children and don't know how to be around them, bet her children would hate her anyway, what a stupid cow"
"Come on, let's get away from that nasty woman"

I burst into tears outside the store as I had a (unwanted) termination a year before that happened and I don't know if I will get the opportunity to have children again

Sorry that you're shaken OP... I wouldn't expect a happy and balanced mother daughter duo to react that way, ever. They obviously had a very troubled day, or life in general, with experiences of feeling abused and powerless and saw you as an easy opportunity to be on the other end of it for once. No excuse at all to behave in such a way, but maybe easier to let go for you thinking of it that way... I think there's really nothing you could've done differently since it all had very little to do with you or your actions personally and walking away surely was the smartest thing to do, unless fist fighting a mum and her teenage daughter in order to mark the alpha woman in Sainsbury's is your thing. By the way, I've said "excuse me?!" before myself in response to rudeness being thrown at me, firstly because I'm usually in disbelief and want to make sure I didn't mishear, and secondly because it gives me a coupe of seconds to gather myself before I respond.

Im sorry you went through that it sounds really scary xx

They're out of order but you shouldn't have responded, they saw it as a challenge and are clearly batshit.

I wouldn't have intervened because I'm a woman just like you, it wasn't my argument and I wouldn't want to get hurt. Someone else getting involved would just have escalated the issue.

Something similar happened to me in the supermarket, mother and teenage daughter - mouthy, aggressive and no need for it. I have just had a little think about what the best response would be and I reckon if this ever happened again I would firmly and authoritatively retort “That’s no way to speak to a police officer or anyone else for that matter. Mind yourself please.” And if it they kicked off I would inform them that I’d be speaking to security.

Sorry you had to experience that. The teenager sounds like a bully, one day she will meet her match Yeah, in prison probably.

Jesus Christ, you wouldn’t last 1 minute at the shit-shelf in our Asda. Not much scares me but I give this a wide berth. You take your life in your hands! 🤣

OP, I would have reacted the same way as you did. I would have been really shaken. People like those two are utter scum. They inhabit houses and worlds where that is how people behave and get their own way. Have a glass of wine and be thankful you are not part of their lives.

It's a horrible thing to happen. I had an idiot man curse at me once as we crossed paths. I was raging, but put it down to him being common scum.

Awful behaviour, I’m sorry this happened to you OP. it’s a sad day when some nutters freak out over the apples in the supermarket. They must be very angry, unhappy people to get so riled about that.