AIBU to feel a lot of sympathy for Lily Allen?

[longwayoff]

The description of her childhood in her recent memoir sounds horrible and extremely damaging. As described, her self indulgent showbiz parents may have paved the way for her in her career but seem to have failed on every other level. Very depressing, I hope she gets a good therapist.

it’s up to you but I don’t feel sorry for her in the slightest, I think she’s awful.

Ever wondered why suicide rates are up? Depression and self harm?

Look no further than this thread for your answers - bile as only humans can dump on each other.

It's really sad how people are judging her parenting. I've been shocked by some of the posts here. I can't imagine typing some of these things about anyone.

To be fair, even she admitted she was an inadequate parent. If she'd been poor or working class people would be making phone calls to social services.

Before long I expect her own children will be saying the same things about her as she says of her own parents.

I’d have some respect if she shut up, continued with the therapy see so desperately needs, without having to tell us about it and quietly got on with trying to raise her children in the way she wishes she’d been raised.

But of course that wouldn’t give her any publicity. Laughing about sex workers on TV and appropriating other people’s tragedies get you far more in the public eye.

If she'd been poor or working class people would be making phone calls to social services.

I'm not disagreeing but it sounds like her ex-husband is a stable influence. A bit like the father of Peaches Geldof's children.

I read an interview where they pointed out that out of Peaches, Lily and Amy Winehouse only Lily is still alive. That's pretty stark.

YABU I'm afraid. Her songs are idiotic advertising jingles, her whole career is the result of nepotism and she threw an undignified hissy fit when her feeble offerings didn't win an award. Plus all the sexual sleaze. Bleuurgh.

I feel very uncomfortable with some of the things she is revealing essentially to make money. She said she wanted her children to know ‘the truth’ but for one thing the truth is very subjective and for another no children know the complete truth about their parents and that is to protect them. Nobody needs to know a blow by blow account of their parents’ sex life.

I think it’s probably not entirely fair on her mother either. I’ve found parenting has made me more empathetic to my parents’ failings but she doesn’t seem to have that sort of insight.

She seems to have a very childish outlook on life and justifies herself and feels she is constantly in the right and justifies herself by saying bad things were done to her or happened to her, she never takes any responsibility for herself.

That tweet for example did reference the Artic Monkey’s, but it was funny when the Arctic Monkey’s did it because they said someone else did it, when you say it about yourself all the humour goes. And combined with the crying it clearly wasn’t much of a joke. I would have more respect if she said ‘Sorry I was a bit pissed and emotional’ or ‘I made a misjudged joke’ but it’s always everybody else’s fault for not understanding her or being sexist. She should also have admitted she didn’t have the authority to apologise for the whole of the UK nor admit it wasn’t the fault of the whole of the UK after that misjudged apology. It’s really, really childish. I think that’s quite typical of millennials sadly and it’s a destructive trait. People around you don’t tend to like you when you constantly blame them for your fuck ups.

Ever wondered why suicide rates are up? Depression and self harm?

I’d say that has more to do with with a lack of funding for mental health services.

Pickle that's a really low remark.

The bile in the first three pages here was enough to stop me reading any more. All this hatred for a complete stranger is utterly bizarre. The human race at its worst.

Everyone has sad, regretable and even tragic things happen to them in life.

The difference between them and Lily Allen is that they don’t get 💰 💰💰 publishing deals to relive it all in turgid prose.

Shes the reason nepotism is not a good thing.

Sorry to disappoint anyone but I don’t hate Lily Allen. I just wish she’d shut up and get on with bringing her kids up rather than embarrassing herself further with her attitudes towards sex workers and her dipping in and out of other people’s tragedies. The way she pops up, makes some vacuous comments which aren’t backed up by the way she lives her own life... it’s really distasteful. She’s a really damaged person and if she had the slightest bit of insight she’d prioritise sorting herself out quietly and getting on with being a better parent rather than shamelessly self promoting.

Say what you like geraldine, doesn't make it true.

blanche it's interesting how you can still such venom for a stranger yet take offence when called out on it. How do you manage to reconcile those double standards?

@pickle - severe underfunding of mental health services I’d say!!!! Because poor people cat get access to therapy - unlike Lilly Allen. Why she can’t just focus on getting help quietly and being a good mother is anyone’s guess

*can’t not cat

jumped up madam andno she cant sing its talking i can do that

and dont apologise for something that wasnt our fault thankyou lily

picklepost, well it does when it’s backed up with a hell of a lot of evidence. It’s well known that there is a mental health funding crisis. I don’t think there’s any particular evidence it’s caused by us being nastier as a society.

For one thing judgement of this sort of behaviour is nothing new and if anything is more restrained now than it was in the past. If you time travelled and popped Lily into the 70s or 40s and she behaved the same way they’d be mistified and she would probably have had her kids taken off and been incarcerated in an asylum a long time ago. Especially that comment about hiring prostitutes, even 20 years ago she would have been finished if she’d said that. Even Courtney Love wouldn’t have pushed the envelope that far.

Sorry pickle I missed that, what have I taken offence about?

Pickle I haven't seen where you've 'called me out' either.
I've commented objectively on someone's lies, the way they set themselves out to be perceived by the public and have said nothing in regards to her looks, parenting or anything personal for that matter other than fact. She is responsible. It's remarkable speaking of responsibly, how even Lily's apology about her Rotherham abuse survivors comment was self aggrandising.

I said your tasteless remark about suicide rates was low because suicide is caused by mental illness. MH health services in this country at least on the NHS are not fit for purpose. Those in a position to pay ironically have a head start than poorer people although it's a very complex subject.

Lily Allen is her own worst enemy.

Perhaps, but it's not good enough for people to say they've had it worse so her life of sexual assault, drug addiction, parental neglect, depression and baby loss are less valid or damaging to her. Humans break for all different reasons.

I don’t think anyone is saying it’s less valid for her. Just that having identified these issues in her own life as having had an awful impact, and also being in the relatively privileged Position of having the money to afford immediate and ongoing therapy, she would do so much better to just quietly sort her shit out. To bang on about all the things her parents did wrong, and all the other ways in which she feels aggrieved, and then to perpetuate it all by behaving so disrespectfully towards others and neglecting her own relationship with her kids..frankly it’s pretty vile