to ask you what it was like when you first held your baby?

[Tamiah]

Sorry, this is my second post tonight! I just joined MN (though have had the app for a long time!) and have had two questions floating around my head that I wanted to ask, so here goes number two...

I was having a discussion today with a colleague, who was trying to describe to me what it was like when she first held her baby. I have struggled to bond with my son/daughter as we have had a few bumps along the way and I've felt a bit detached at certain points in my pregnancy. Hearing her today telling me about the wave of emotions she felt, including the live she never knew she had in her, for a tiny baby that she created really helped me to feel more positive about giving birth.

WIBU to ask you to describe (or try to!) what you felt when you saw your baby for the first time?

I can imagine it's such a hard thing to describe - sorry if I've asked for the impossible!

DS1 was a lovely calm birth. The moment he was born and placed on me was sheer joyous relief.
I'd been critically ill with flu 6 weeks earlier. So absolute relief that he was here and seemed unharmed by the flu and drugs.

Tears came later. As I thanked God that I live in a time and place where medicine could save us. The feeling of wanting to love and protect was incredible.

DS2 was a very quick delivery. OMG the head there, MWs piled into the room, one push baby delivered.
My memories are sketchy as it was so fast and a bit shocking. But that amazing feeling of OMG your here and wft just happened. I vaguely remember calling DH.
The love came when I got him back in my arms after they stitched me up.

First baby: Yeah, she's nice enough. Looks a lot like a lizard though. Guess I'll get used to her.

I had an easy enough time with her and didn't have PND, but for some months it felt like I was looking after someone else's baby. The love came gradually.

Second baby: She's very big and red! Doesn't look happy.

I didn't love that one from birth either. She was very ill and wasn't expected to live, so I was afraid to love her. She did recover. It took a few months for me to feel attached to her.