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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Pansexual? AIBU to not understand how this isn't different to Bi?

260 replies

GoatWoman · 13/09/2018 22:34

I really don't understand this new phenomena and I feel completely ignorant.
In my day (80's - 90's), if not having a sexual preference you termed yourself bisexual. Not that anybody has to classify themselves at all.

But recently I hear more of pan-sexual. What on earth does it mean? The only explanation I've heard is that they choose the mind over biology. Isn't that what everyone does?

OP posts:
MajesticWhine · 14/09/2018 18:07

@FermatsTheorem Grinlove it

feedmecoffee · 14/09/2018 18:25

The definition of queer is actually something strange, odd or unusual... just like how gay actually means happy.. any other insulting definitions I would consider slang made up by homophobes. You could see a dog dressed up as shrek riding a unicycle and remark "oh how queer" and it be correct in context.. and no I can't keep up with all this new terms for sexuality and gender either, doesn't concern me what others do behind their bedroom door anyway, nor is it a concern of mine how others choose to identify themselves. I've never got any stick for being a heterosexual female, I've never been asked my sexual orientation or gender by anyone so can't see why such a fuss gets made..

Theswaggyotter · 14/09/2018 21:53

It’s just this generation thinking they are so ground breaking and original as no one has ever broken gender stereotypes before, aren’t we so special. Except feminists have been doing all this for decades without the need for 70+ labels to clarify minor personality traits such as having a different colour of hair.
And as so many others have pointed out - if we need the term pansexual to differentiate from bisexual (by being trans inclusive) why do lesbians have to accept be-penised transbian partners? If bisexuals are allowed to not want a sexual relationship with someone who is trans why are lesbians not??
And if transwomen are women and trans men are men then surely the requirement for the term pansexual is lost? Because by definition you would just be choosing a man or woman as a partner, therefore are bisexual.
There is absolutely hee-haw logic to it and the minute you break it down it all falls apart

winewolfhowls · 14/09/2018 22:14

I saw a channel four documentary once about a woman that was attracted to the Berlin Wall.

Iamagreyhoundhearmeroar · 14/09/2018 22:20

Well that’s just mental health issues, isn’t it? It couldn’t possibly be appropriated as a thing, could it?
(Please tell me it couldn’t!)

winewolfhowls · 14/09/2018 22:26

If I recall it was a documentary about people attracted to all sorts but I can't remember any of it in detail.

squishee · 15/09/2018 07:50

Wiki has a good explanation of pansexual.

The Belgian drivers thing is hilarious. Yes, there is such a stereotype! I'll say no more on that...

ArcheryAnnie · 15/09/2018 12:27

Asexual people can enjoy sex, asexuality means a lack of sexual attraction not the inability to have sex.

I think anyone who enjoys sex, and pursues sexual relationships, is being utterly ridiculous if they call themselves "asexual".

MissionItsPossible · 16/09/2018 11:58

@winewolfhowls

I saw a channel four documentary once about a woman that was attracted to the Berlin Wall

Which she cheated on when she had an affair and eventually married the Eiffel Tower (I’m not joking)

straightjeans · 17/09/2018 08:15

They are the same, Bisexual is man, woman + others. People just love to make up micro identities to feel extra special.

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