Pansexual? AIBU to not understand how this isn't different to Bi?

[GoatWoman]

I really don't understand this new phenomena and I feel completely ignorant.
In my day (80's - 90's), if not having a sexual preference you termed yourself bisexual. Not that anybody has to classify themselves at all.

But recently I hear more of pan-sexual. What on earth does it mean? The only explanation I've heard is that they choose the mind over biology. Isn't that what everyone does?

No, there are definitely only two biological sexes. If you have a Y chromosome, you are male. If you don't you're female.

Some men and women who have a chromosome disorders may have extra X chromosomes or be lacking one but they're still catagorized, medically and biologically as male or female depending on the presence or absence of a Y chromosome.

It’s not a new term, in fact I hear it a lot less now than I did in the 90’s.

Pan has been around as a definition for at least 15 years to my knowledge. I guess yes it means any gender or identity including Trans etc.
I dont like the term bisexual, it implies it's all about sex,in my head.

I refer to myself as queer, I like the term and it suits me on all levels. . But yes it's more generic, can be used by gay men or women, and those attracted to both (or all if we're going there!) Genders.

It’s romantic attraction to people not their gender

Cosmopolitan describes it below:

“Pansexuality means an attraction to people regardless of their gender. “Their pattern of attraction does not generally include what someone’s gender is,” says sex therapist Dr. Liz Powell. So, a pansexual person may be attracted to their own gender, as well as other genders. However, someone’s gender is not a requirement or determining factor of whether or not they want to date or sleep with you. Sex therapist Dr. Kelly Wise defines pansexual as, “someone who is attracted to people regardless of gender or biological sex. That is irrelevant. Pansexuality holds space for the idea that gender is very fluid.”

Remember, while sex is typically assigned by doctors at birth depending on genitals, gender is a social construct. People should be able to identify with whatever gender they feel best suits them, be it male, female, non-binary, genderqueer, or genderfluid regardless of what the doctor in the birthing room says. A sexual orientation, such as pansexuality, is different than gender identity, but for pansexuals, gender identity is not what makes them into (or not into) someone. Dr. Powell points out that as it’s a newer term, younger generations, such as Generation Z may be more likely to identify as pansexual over bisexual.”

o, there are definitely only two biological sexes. If you have a Y chromosome, you are male. If you don't you're female.
I wish Mumsnet would make up it mind on this (tbf AIBU treating a community as a singular and I don’t necessarily disagree with the person I’ve chosen to quote).

But sometimes Mumsnet likes to say it’s genitalia that defines your binary sex, sometimes it’s chromosomes. Sometimes people with XX chromosomes have a penis, sometimes people have a Y chromosome and have a vagina.

And maybe a Pansexual is someone who isn’t all that bothered about who has or hasn’t got a particular set of genitals and how they correspond with their chromosomes, be it due to biology or surgery or whatever. Maybe there’s a lot of overlap with bisexuals, maybe there are areas of difference.

Either way I don’t quite get why the label is so funny.

I understand the distinction between bi and pan, but I do think it's almost entirely arbitrary. But that's ok. I don't care what people want to call themselves, because I'm not a dick.

OP's thinly veiled "innocent question" didn't take long to become a rant about attention seeking entitled snowflakes yada yada yada

OP, if you're honestly not being goady then why mention smacking your child in the context of sexuality? It's completely irrelevant..

@GoatWoman when you mentioned the animals was when I noticed your name...kinda like "asking for a 'friend'" was ya? Perhaps...uh hmm 🤫🤔 and then I see that you have a mane, and I'm surely it's a lovely mane 🐐 (do goats have manes? My chinfluff probably resembles a Nanny goat at times, if caught in the beautiful first light of the sunrise and there was no hedge strummer immediately to hand...) But I'm sure Pam involves no animals so horses, beautifully maned goats and ferrets and the like will no doubt be safe. How v wholesome.

*pan, not Pam. Sorry if there's a Pam here I have mortified ~~~~~~~~~~

It seems to me the term pansexual is mainly a bit of a modern "rebranding" of bisexual. Bisexual people are often very unfairly assumed:

• to be gay and in denial about it ("Bi now, gay later"); or
• to not be satisfied with a single partner as they are attracted to both sexes.

I also think some people use the term "pan" because it is seen to be inclusive of gender non-binary people who may say that they do not identify as either sex (although in reality their biological and legal sex will be either male or female, even if they reject the societal expectations of gender).

I think the references to trans in the context of pansexuality are very confusing. I do see some people refer to themselves as "pan" specifically because they are open to dating transpeople as well as non-trans people of either sex. But if "bi" were to mean only attracted to non-trans people of either sex, then why would there not be an equivalent term for lesbians and gay people who only want to date non-trans people? 🤷‍♀️

Sometimes people with XX chromosomes have a penis

This is bullshit. Just because some twat on the internet with an agenda thinks disorders of sexual development are as random as plucking lottery numbers out of a hat and that they can use imaginary intersex variations to pretend men can actually be women, doesn't make it so.

But sometimes Mumsnet likes to say it’s genitalia that defines your binary sex, sometimes it’s chromosomes. Sometimes people with XX chromosomes have a penis, sometimes people have a Y chromosome and have a vagina.

PS - there happens to be a very close correlation between the presence of a Y chromosome and the development of a penis. Hence why some people find it a convenient shorthand to say 'if you have a penis, you are MALE', for example.

I heard it’s a term to get attention from people that would think you were otherwise boring.

OK, so I identify as pan (though if asked outside a context where I think it will be understood, I just say bi). The distinction I make is that...my understanding of bi (and this may not actually be the understanding even of everyone who calls themselves bi) is that men and women are...sort of two different flavours of what you like. It's like liking chocolate and strawberry icecream; you like both, but they are different. My sexual attraction to people doesn't rest at all on what they're packing (or not) in their underwear, it tends to be more about what they are packing between their ears. The genitalia and gender presentation are both a make it work kinda thing. I don't date or shag fuckwits, though, so it's not like I have no standards.

My sexual attraction to people doesn't rest at all on what they're packing (or not) in their underwear, it tends to be more about what they are packing between their ears.

So you’re attracted to people on terms that are the same as most of the people on the planet and you don’t have a preference on gender so basically bisexual, yes?

Bisexual implies there are two genders, male and female, and you can be attracted to either. Pansexual means you acknowledge more than two genders (including, for example, non-binary or agender individuals) and could be attracted to anyone regardless of their gender.

I don’t really understand how a person is able to use mumsnet but not google, but it seems to be a common problem.

What a crock of shit

And has ever been the case there are many - including on this thread - who believe that what they haven’t personally experienced cannot be real. Sad but unsurprising.

and could be attracted to anyone regardless of their gender. = bisexual

The point is that pansexuality is intentionally more inclusive. The terms are closely related but they are distinct. Bisexuality doesn’t explicitly recognise genders other than male or female. Pansexuality does. Surely you can recognise that there is a difference there?

Bisexual implies there are two genders, male and female, and you can be attracted to either.

Or does it recognise, accurately, that there are two sexes and you can be attracted to both?

There are a lot of us here who think gender is a socially constructed nonsense which is harmful to women.

Good to see people find it funny 🙄
I'm pansexual, it means you are gender blind, you are attracted to the person not the gender

Bisexuality doesn’t explicitly recognise genders other than male or female

There aren’t any other sexes other than male and female.

I'm pansexual, it means you are gender blind, you are attracted to the person not the gender
HOW is that any different to bisexuality!?

If you’re unwilling to accept that gender and sex are not the same thing then you’ll never be able to accept or understand pansexuality, but you should at least be respectful enough to acknowledge that that’s your position instead of just blithely claiming that pansexuality is exactly the same as bisexuality.