Would you be upset if your parents and both your adult DDs forgot, and five days, later still seemed unaware...

[liz70]

...that your DH and you had had your twentieth wedding anniversary? No card, no phonecall, no message, no acknowledgement whatsoever?

Just that, really.

I have no idea what date my parents got married! And I've never sent them a card! Although now I think about it, they will be coming up to 40 years at some point soon, so I hope they'll give us advance notice of that, since it's a big milestone!

No,,everything that I have these days, concerning some kind of anniversary, is always forgotten by people,including family, I am not bothered at all,, just keeping hoping that I see another birthday,, as getting on a bit now ha ha

If it is a big anniversary then tell them beforehand if you want a gift/card. I never knew the date of my parents anniversary and don't expect DS to know/remember ours. My parents did have big party tupe celebrations for their 25th and 50th wedding anniversaries which my sisters and I helped organise but they were discussed with my parents months in advance. No-one was expected to know when the anniversary was without being told in advance

I know what date my parents' anniversary, but I'd have to ring them up to find out how long they've been married for!

I'm pretty confident they'll drop me hints when the time comes if they want a golden anniversary card...

My mum always makes a big deal about it coming up as a way to remind me that I’m expected to produce cards and a gift. I’m not sure why I have to acknowledge a wedding I didn’t even attend, especially given I already buy cards and gifts for Mother’s and Father’s Day.

No, it is not a significant anniversary such as 25th or 50th.

No. Anniversaries are husband wife thing. If anyone else remembers it is a bonus.

I think celebrating other people's anniversaries, even family, is a bit weird tbh. But my parents appreciate a card and I made a big fuss for their 40th (holiday away, presents etc). It would upset them if I didn't, so I do it even though I think it's a bit strange.

No I wouldn't - our anniversary is between us, I don't know when my parents or inlaws is and I wouldn't expect them to do anything to acknowledge ours unless we were having a party or similar

No. Get a grip. I hate that my husbands parents expect me to make a big thing of theirs when I didn’t even know when they got married! 😂 I find it really odd! I don’t expect anyone but my husband to remember ours!

No. We don’t bother with cards. My mother in law always sends one, and tbh it means nothing to me, or her (!); she is just going through the motions.

We've just celebrated our 20th and the only reason my kids found out was because my other half sent me a very loving text and my nosey 14 year old spotted it!

Unfortunately my step-father NEVER BLOODY forgets. His and my mother's wedding anniversary (4 years before ours) is also four days before ours. He LOVES sending me a happy anniversary card so that the next time we speak he can ask if I got his card and to remark how I'd forgotten my mothers for the umpteenth time. We've been doing this for at least 17 years and it makes me so so so bloody pissed off!!!

You're not the only one who gets upset though. My SIL had a little dig that we didn't remember their 10th anniversary...I wasn't even part of the family back then so not sure how I was expected to know

I’m actually suffering a bit today, our WA yesterday and no one in family remembered, just a few friends, one being my best man. I couldn’t give a toss be be honest, both I and my OH remembered with cards and gifts however OH upset that people forgot and I can’t understand why she’s so pissed Off

No, it wouldn't cross my mind. It's not a big deal.

Never get cards or anything from anyone for anniversaries. Our 30th was yesterday and although DH and I vaguely celebrated, No one else really knew or cared.

Why the fuck should anyone besides your husband remember that?? If you want people to acknowledge it , you have to TELL them.

Remembering birthdays is bad enough, wedding anniversaries.. seriously..?!

If you & DH remembered then I wouldn’t give two hoots. It’s your anniversary together, no one else’s.

I get an anniversary card from my NEIGHBOUR with whom I'm not even particularly close every year.
This to me , without seeming ungrateful and I would never voice this to her, is completely bizarre and inappropriate.
My anniversary is between my husband and myself, no one else.
Don't be upset.

Unsure. My Mum and Dad just kept it to themselves however my wife and her brother always buy cards for their parents. Just depends really

I’m lucky if I remember my anniversary so wouldn’t bother me at all.

I always give my parents a gift for their anniversary. Normally it’s just a bottle of wine or something, but I did buy them a bronze to mark a big anniversary.

I’m really surprised at all the people saying an anniversary is between the couple only.
I think in this day in age that The sanctity of marriage should be celebrated (whether hetro or Cival partnerships). All too often people throw in the towel and just quit when the going gets tough. I’m not a religious person at all but I do think that it is something that should be cherished. I always sent my parents at card and our four children all send a card to my husband and myself.

This thread just reminded me that our anniversary was a couple of weeks ago. Neither of us remembered at all. Oops? But I'd certainly never expect anyone else to know the date, far less remember it. Not their wedding, after all.

Maybe have a silver wedding anniversary meal or party next year? That way you know people will also mark the day with you.

People tend to to remember ours because we got married on Valentine’s Day and have friends who also have theirs the same day, but 5 years apart. Other than that particular couple, no-one remembers ours. Not a big deal.