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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Penis portions

443 replies

AldiAisleOfTat · 26/08/2018 12:23

It's a MIL one sorry!
Generally I like MIL. Our relationship isn't that bad, however, I'm fat and she really really can't cope with the idea that I'm not crash dieting. She is permanently on a diet.
We stayed with them yesterday. Lunch while traveling and then dinner there. Roast chicken.
I was served a single roastie, a slice of breast meat and 2 tablespoons of veg. Mil had slightly more. FIL and DH had laden plates.
After looking in shock I asked for some more, she said there wasn't any. DH then split his food with me, leaving us both with reasonable sized portions. Later on because of the atmosphere we went off to the pub and had a little too much to drink, we got fish and chips on the way home, and ate them sitting in her garden while she glared through the kitchen window.
She then made some comment about me being a pig once we were inside. I replied that if she was a decent host who served adequate food to both sexes then we wouldn't still be hungry, and left as soon as we were safe to drive (midmorning)
DH is very stressed about it all and wants me to call her. I have no wish to.
WIBU?

OP posts:

Laiste · 27/08/2018 11:02

And here. South Northants.

Laiste · 27/08/2018 11:03

Ours is closed on a Tuesday. and i bloody forget and for some reason always seem to fancy F&C on Tuesdays and end up disappointed

Bluntness100 · 27/08/2018 11:03

I think you've all behaved badly. She clearly shouldn't have given you a smaller portion than others, but your husband redistributed to you and you stated you then both had a reasonable sized portion.

You should have offered to bring them fish and chips back. I can't imagine staying at someone's home, buying fish and chips, not offering them any, and then sitting in their garden eating it where they could see me. Especially not after eating the food they provided. Oh and doing so pissed.

And you were not honest with her, you were not hungry becayse she had served you a smaller portion as you told her,, becayse you said you had a reasonable dinner, you were simply hungry and wished to eat a second dinner.

When you say she called you a pig, clearly this isn't acceptable, but can you relay the conversation?

WorraLiberty · 27/08/2018 11:16

It's the law on MN that anyone who survives on more than a lettuce leaf per day is a disgusting glutton

That's not the MN I recognise at all. In fact many threads read like a competition to see who can eat the most in one sitting.

goodgirls · 27/08/2018 11:17

It's the law on MN that anyone who survives on more than a lettuce leaf per day is a disgusting glutton

Stupidest thing I've seen on MN in ages, and that is some stiff competition!

SinisterBumFacedCat · 27/08/2018 11:21

Personally I would have found the who situation so bloody awkward I wouldn't have wanted to have to tell the MIL how ridiculous she was being, you don't treat guests that way. If MIL really has to be told it's sexist and rude to serve someone significantly less food after she's already witnessed her son split the portions she's incredibly dense, why should it fall to the the OP to point out the bleedin' obvious? As for going to the pub, getting pissed and having fish and chips, well why the hell not? It's a good way of letting off steam when you've been made to few spectacularly unwelcome in someone's home. And that was before the pig incident!

Honestly people will always wade in on here and do anything to defend the indefensible!

Birdsgottafly · 27/08/2018 11:21

""It is certainly true that the food was inadequate
But it's a bit rude to say so.""

Some people need telling and she should have been told long ago.

"I don't know where the OP is but you can certainly get fish and chips on Sunday in Scotland""

You can her, Liverpool. I've been across the North and Wales and you can. In the ore Tourist places in Scotland, you certainly can, you should start a campaign, or fill the gap in the market.

OP, I think your DH should have phoned and asked if she wanted anything bringing in and why.

Eating them outside was considerate, no washing up or smells.

Do not apologise, you've got nothing to be sorry about. Stop taking her shit.

Birdsgottafly · 27/08/2018 11:25

""It's the law on MN that anyone who survives on more than a lettuce leaf per day is a disgusting glutton
Stupidest thing I've seen on MN in ages, and that is some stiff competition!""

You obviously have missed the many threads/posts were competitive under-eating and appetite gets ridiculous.

Wait until Christmas and you'll see the many posts about, "if they ate a cooked breakfasts on Christmas Morning, they wouldn't eat again all day", blah blah blah.

SinisterBumFacedCat · 27/08/2018 11:28

OP started thread yesterday on Sunday, she said she stayed at MILs the day before.

So the question is are fish and chip shops open on a Saturday evening?

Answer - Yes

Can we move on from this now?

AnExcellentUsername · 27/08/2018 11:31

@birds I thought it was just me that must have clearly dreamt all those threads. And the replies here telling op that she was a bit "piggy". 🙄

stressedoutpa · 27/08/2018 11:32

I haven't read the full thread but you were both rude. Her for calling you a pig and you for going to the pub/getting pissed/eating fish and chips in the garden.

I wouldn't like to be friends with either of you!

goodgirls · 27/08/2018 11:33

You obviously have missed the many threads/posts were competitive under-eating and appetite gets ridiculous

I've seen the odd one, and they are full of people taking the piss out of them. It's a very very long way from that to "its the law on MN" (which just sounds so wanky anyway since there is no consensus on any single issue)

bastardkitty · 27/08/2018 11:34

I bet the OP is gutted!

AnExcellentUsername · 27/08/2018 11:39

@goodgirls it's called hyperbole.

SnuggyBuggy · 27/08/2018 11:39

We had fish and chips canapes when I got married. Little piece of battered fish and 3 chips. That's probably MILs ideal portion.

goodgirls · 27/08/2018 11:41

No thats not what hyperbole is. Hyperbole only works when the thing you are exaggerating is true in the first place. Exaggerating an untruth is not hyperbole.

AnExcellentUsername · 27/08/2018 11:46

🤔

Knittedfairies · 27/08/2018 12:01

No thats not what hyperbole is. Hyperbole only works when the thing you are exaggerating is true in the first place. Exaggerating an untruth is not hyperbole

My English teacher once said ‘hyperbole is saying millions when you mean three’.

goodgirls · 27/08/2018 12:06

not sure what you don't get. The thing you are being hyperbolic about has to be actually true at the core, otherwise its not an exaggeration to make a point, its merely an exaggerated lie.
As in, "I've told you a million times to move your shoes" is hyperbole if you have said several times to move the shoes. If you haven't said it at all, its not hyperbole, its just nonsensical.

Larrythecat · 27/08/2018 12:13

I'm aghast at the cooked breakfast / toast post!
Men need more calories... compared to a woman of the same age, build and physical activity. It's not right to give males more food just because of the sex. A 17yo female doing sports probably needs more food than a 50yo male with a sedentary life.

It's not right to portion control guests either, neither is body shaming. Yanbu!

AnExcellentUsername · 27/08/2018 12:15

Why are you taking what I said so literally and seriously? Have I touched a nerve?

And I'm "confused" because no definition of hyperbole that I have looked up says anywhere that the statement has to be true or whatever it is you're clutching at. 😂

ByeGermsByeWorries · 27/08/2018 12:17

Penis portions

goodgirls · 27/08/2018 12:23

Because you completely mischaracterised the prevailing opinion. In short, you lied to prove a point.

If you don't understand what hyperbole is its not really my problem.

AnExcellentUsername · 27/08/2018 12:27

😂 and I'm the "wanky" one

"Mischaracterised the prevailing opinion" wtf are you even talking about?? Throwing about words like that does not make you sound clever especially when you're taking utter shite!

AnExcellentUsername · 27/08/2018 12:28

And now can I "lie" about an OPINION?

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