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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Getting married in jeans and a t shirt

194 replies

Bunnyattack · 29/07/2018 08:33

I hear this all the time...people saying along the lines of they would be happy to gondown the registry office in jeans and a t shirt....has anyone ever done this or not worn a transitional wedding dress??
Had a very small casual wedding??

I love the idea of it but have never actually come across anyone who has had a proper low key wedding

OP posts:
J3551011 · 29/07/2018 09:32

I had a very low key wedding. I wore trousers and a vest top which I already owned. We had close family there and then all went for pizza. We literally did just want to be married and didn’t want all the fuss. It was lovely x

Tara336 · 29/07/2018 09:33

We are looking for a elopement wedding venue if anyone has any recommendations? It’s a second marriage for us both and neither of us want a huge fuss as been there done that with our first marriages.

CatherineMaitland · 29/07/2018 09:34

I had a low-key wedding - genuinely didn't want anybody there. Cheapest registry office room available, strangers as witnesses, went out for lunch afterwards just the two of us. I did wear a jacket and blouse with my jeans though. It was perfect and I don't regret it at all.

We'd been living together for 15 years and I wasn't bothered at all about getting married. I never, never wanted all the fuss and attention of a traditional wedding. Don't even wear a ring now. Each to their own though.

IthinkIsawahairbrushbackthere · 29/07/2018 09:34

Our son and daughter in law did last summer. She wore a cotton dress although he wore a suit and tied his long hair back. There were three guests - her mum, my husband and myself. The wedding ceremony at the registry office was intimate and very moving. Afterwards we drove off to a local beauty spot and took photos on our phones and then went to a favourite pub of theirs for a meal.

Our other son got married last week and it could not have been more different - the church was full of family and friends, a big informal reception afterwards, dancing, speeches - the lot.

The two weddings were perfect for the people who were getting married. I am so glad my older son was able to have what he and his wife wanted and didn't stress over pleasing other people.

crunchymint · 29/07/2018 09:34

Colleague got married just in nice clothes they already had. So not jeans a t shirts, but not anything special either.
Surely most people having a low key wedding would still wear their best clothes they already have?

LemonadePockets · 29/07/2018 09:36

My cousin and his wife got married in matching shorts and tshirts (white tshirts of course!)

Ifeelshit · 29/07/2018 09:36

My friend got married in jeans and a jumper with a sunflower on which she knitted for the occasion. Very small registry office affair. She was very happy.

Thurlow · 29/07/2018 09:37

I'm getting married in a few weeks time. DP will be in jeans, probably upgraded to a shirt. I'll be in a navy dress I wear for work and to be honest the only reason I'm wearing that and not jeans is because we're going to a nice restaurant after.

Witnesses are two neighbours we're friendly with - close enough to not be strangers, but not close enough to actually offend anyone else.

So yes, we are I suppose!

81Byerley · 29/07/2018 09:41

ButchyRestingFace I met a woman who got married to her fiance's son in prison. Her fiancé had told his son he'd had a row with her because he didn't want to get married, they were ok as they were. The son said "You're mad, Dad, I'd marry her in a flash!", The fiancé told her what his son had said, so she phoned the son and asked him if he meant it. He said yes. She had a big wedding dress, married him, then continued with her normal life, living and sharing a bed with his dad. She knew the new husband had to do at least 14 years. He'll be out now, I wonder if they're still together?

QuiteUnfitBit · 29/07/2018 09:41

I can't even remember what we got married in - and it was only a couple of years ago! Shock (No photos)
Just popped into the registry office, with our two teenage DC as witnesses. (They were under 18, but I ok'd it first, and it was fine.) Then carried on with our day.

BroomstickOfLove · 29/07/2018 09:43

Surely most people having a low key wedding would still wear their best clothes they already have?

I suspect that if you are the sort of person who wants to get married with two witnesses and no fuss, you are also more likely to be the sort of person who feels at their best and most generally fabulous in their favourite old pair of jeans.

scarbados · 29/07/2018 09:44

We had a tiny register office wedding with 8 guests, followed by afternoon tea in a cafe. I wore a 40s-style dress I bought on eBay for about £30 and wore shoes I'd had for years. My bouquet was wild flowers picked in the park opposite our house during the morning and tied with a ribbon to match my dress. Transport was provided by NDN (and guest) who also drove us home afterwards and stopped on the way to buy us fish and chips for our first meal as a married couple. (Husband sat in the front of the car and I was in the back seat along NDN's 3 month old baby in her seat, clutching my finger all the way home.)

I loved every minute of the wedding and wouldn't want it to have been any different.

MissCharleyP · 29/07/2018 09:46

Got married in Vegas last year, just the two of us. I did wear a nice dress in hot pink lace, DH wore trousers and a shirt. I’d have been more than happy in shorts, vest top and trainers but DH said we should make a bit of effort!

GnomeDePlume · 29/07/2018 09:49

Work dress for me, suit he already had for DH. Lunch at a posh Chinese restaurant then home.

Coming up 27 years ago in a couple of weeks.

Only regret is that there is no record of the speeches especially DFs as he died 20 years ago.

C8H10N4O2 · 29/07/2018 09:50

Friends of mine married in jeans. They just went to the town hall and married on their own.

They had not planned to marry but had to in order to travel abroad together for work so they kept it to the minimum legal necessities. For them the marriage cert is just a legal document, the commitment is with each other.

Wingbing · 29/07/2018 09:52

DH and I married in a registry office, just 2 DC and DM & MIL as witnesses.

DS2 was only a couple of months old so it suited us perfectly. We had a night alone in a hotel afterwards.

As I had been married before I knew that I didn’t want a traditional wedding, too lazy to organise, and to me, a waste of money.

hazeyjane · 29/07/2018 09:54

I got married in jeans, a homemade —butchered— dress and snorkel parka (it was October and bloody freezing!). No guests, witnesses from car park. Went to Pizza Hut afterwards.....it was very exclusive.

unlimiteddilutingjuice · 29/07/2018 09:54

I have an acquaintance that got married in his lunch break in jeans and a T. Shirt.
I did the opposite and turned up at the registry office in the full blamangue with 30 guests.

Original poster
Bunnyattack · 29/07/2018 09:59

bluedog your wedding sounds perfect to me and you both look lovely and casual

OP posts:
ItWentInMyEye · 29/07/2018 09:59

My dad wore jeans and a tshirt when he married his second wife. A lot of the guests were more dressed up (as was the bride in a short red dress), but it was what they wanted so nobody judged.

Gwenhwyfar · 29/07/2018 10:01

"Ex colleague and his wife wore football shirts, apparently."

How awful. Why would you dress worse than what you would for normal life or going to work. Nothing worse than the smell of sweat in football shirts.

Gwenhwyfar · 29/07/2018 10:02

"my dress was less than £150 from Selfridges! "

That's 3 times more than I've ever spent on a dress!
Hardly the same as jeans and T-shirt as you're making a significant effort.

bridgetreilly · 29/07/2018 10:05

I know quite a few who got married in smart casual clothes, or bought a nice normal dress or whatever for the occasion. I don't think I know anyone who literally wore jeans and t-shirt.

DianaPrincessOfThemyscira · 29/07/2018 10:07

I didn’t and I don’t know anyone that did - it seems more of a Las Vegas type thing to me?

That’s not to say i think any less of it - I absolutely don’t. I’ve said many times I wish we’d gone a lot lower key with ours (and we only spent £2k!) but actually a nice dress was my only ‘want’.

Ullupullu · 29/07/2018 10:08

We wore our everyday clothes. Witnesses were one set of parents. No big fuss, shortest ceremony the registrar had done. We were marrying for the contract not the ceremony.