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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Getting married in jeans and a t shirt

194 replies

Bunnyattack · 29/07/2018 08:33

I hear this all the time...people saying along the lines of they would be happy to gondown the registry office in jeans and a t shirt....has anyone ever done this or not worn a transitional wedding dress??
Had a very small casual wedding??

I love the idea of it but have never actually come across anyone who has had a proper low key wedding

OP posts:

Ylvamoon · 29/07/2018 08:54

We had a low key wedding! I just had black trousers and smart top my husband the same! Had about 20 guests of close friends and family. We had a great time and I would do it all over again. (But than I never saw the point is spending £££ on a dress worn once and a party where you can't spend time with all your guests because there are too many.)

AConvivialHost · 29/07/2018 08:55

I got married in a Registry office in a skirt, cami and cardi. DH was in trousers and shirt. Our witness was in cargos and approach shoes, and the other witness was a member of the Registry Office staff. Think we have one photo from the day. Happily married 15 years this year

Ethelswith · 29/07/2018 08:56

My DFriend did, more or less. She wore her then favourite dress and her DH wore a suit. Only parents and siblings attended.

They were married for nearly 20 years (until death). Funeral was immediate family only as well.

specialsubject · 29/07/2018 08:57

did wear a dress (came in handy for several big weddings) but if there had been civil partnerships it would have been great as even the basic vows are cringey.

just five mins, no big deal but quite enough fuss thanks.

as they say 'a public statement of a private intention '. same as a proposal I would have preferred a private wedding.

specialsubject · 29/07/2018 08:58

and it was immediate family only. quite enough.

Thebluedog · 29/07/2018 09:03

Yes I did. Jeans, heels, white vest top and a flowery kimono

Just me and my dh (who was also wearing jeans), grabbed a couple of whitnesses from the library next door to the registrars office.

Had haggis and chips from the chippy afterwards? then into town for cocktails and a lovely meal in the evening.

twoshedsjackson · 29/07/2018 09:04

A friend of mine remembers one of her teachers getting married in a low-key way.....she took morning registration as Miss X, made full use of her free periods that morning, and announced to her form at afternoon registration that, from then onwards, she would like to be addressed as Mrs Y. Presumably her colleagues knew in advance, and she was married in the smart suit expected for teaching in a girls' grammar school.

Nitw1t · 29/07/2018 09:05

I'm getting married in 6 weeks - jeans and t shirt, registry office, wekeday morning then the afternoon off for lunch. Back to work the next day. Just our surviving parents and our DCs. Not just a phrase, we've lived together for 6 years and have 2 DCs so no big fuss required, the real commitment to each other was made a while back! Not patronising to what anyone else chooses to do. Just right for us.

We have quite a lot of siblings with young families of their own so we're having a family BBQ a few days later at the weekend. Easier for them than attending a ceremony/do. I might wear a summer dress or jeans. We'll see what the weather is doing! No make up, hair, speeches or photographers. Caterers only because I can't be arsed feeding 30 people.

TwoBlueShoes · 29/07/2018 09:05

I don't know if you can still do it, but you used to be able to watch registry office weddings on webcams. If you watch mid-week, day-time weddings they are often more casual.

Thebluedog · 29/07/2018 09:06

Here’s a wedding photo

bluemoonchances · 29/07/2018 09:07

One of my good friends and now wife did this. The both went to work in the morning, had the afternoon booked off, went to register office in jeans and got married... didn't tell anyone until after, even family! It was a very "them" thing to do and everyone was just thrilled for them and pleased they did it how they wanted to. My mum would have been gutted if I did that so I would never have done it as wouldn't want to upset her

ConferencePear · 29/07/2018 09:08

We did this in April this year. I bought a Coast dress DH wore a suit he already had. We asked our recently retired neighbour if he would come with us as a witness and his wife took the day off work so she could be the other one. We travelled in their car. Afterwards we went to a local pub and had lunch.

We informed immediate family by phone afterwards.

strawberrisc · 29/07/2018 09:09

TwoBlueShoes are the webcams inside or outside the registry offices?

TwoBlueShoes · 29/07/2018 09:12

They used to be inside the registry offices, so you could actually watch random people getting married.

arranfan · 29/07/2018 09:12

I've known several couples do this. Same rate of difficulty/success as other marriages with more elaborate weddings.

Warpdrive · 29/07/2018 09:15

Not jeans, but a summer dress. Very low key wedding. Registry office with just family and 2 best friends, then home for a few drinks in the garden. I was 8 months pregnant so didn’t feel it would be appropriate to have all the fuss. Entire thing (fees, rings, dress, booze) was £500. No regrets.

ButchyRestingFace · 29/07/2018 09:16

I remember a poster some years ago reminiscing about an acquaintance getting married in ripped jeans.

Said acquaintance was a resident at HMP Wherever. Apparently she looked resplendent in her 501s...

Mousetrap3 · 29/07/2018 09:16

We did, I wore a denim skirt casual tshirt and flip flops. DH wore casual trousers and tshirt. Parents knew and came but other than that nobody knew. Probably cost about £200 in total including wedding rings each. No regrets whatsoever.

Penguin34 · 29/07/2018 09:18

I had a tiny wedding so very simple - no music or cake etc and only 3 guests (Dad walked me 'up the aisle' which was actually a path, Mum was witness and hubs friend was best man) plus the mayor and a translator.

V small, intimate and perfect but I did wear a full on wedding dress and I loved it.

It was on a cliff over the amalfi coast but still very simple.
If jeans and t shirt was the only way I could have married my hub I would but I always wanted to wear a wedding dress

AnnabelleLecter · 29/07/2018 09:22

It's not for us as we like to dress up.
Small weddings are lovely but doesn't mean you can't wear a special outfit.
I know people who tied the knot with just themselves and their children but still got all dressed up.

rubyjude · 29/07/2018 09:24

We went off on our own and got married just us abroad. My husband wore simple white shirt andshorts he got at Next, I wore a simple inexpensive dress I got online. Still don't regret it, it was perfect for us.

Justanotheruser01 · 29/07/2018 09:26

If you want random weddings a 'friend' told me about little. Chapel .com
(Written like that so my post doeent get linked on google!)

DearPrudence · 29/07/2018 09:27

Hot sunny day. DH wore shorts and a shirt, I wore a white cotton strappy dress and sandals. Got married 10.30am and had lunch in a beautiful country pub with about 20 close family and friends.

Bigger and dressier weddings can be lovely but to me, spending big money on things like flowers and cars and seat back covers and fancy hotels etc is just madness, even if you can afford it. And for what? To have a set of pictures that look exactly the same as everyone else's.

81Byerley · 29/07/2018 09:27

I knew someone who had numerous arguments about how/ when she and her partner would marry. She used to tell him she wished she could just wake up married, no fuss, no faffing about. He came home one day and said they'd been invited to his boss's wedding, and gave her money for hair, nails, and an outfit, saying he wanted to show her off to his boss and workmates. When she arrived at the registry office he was there with all their family and friends, in his best suit with a buttonhole, holding a lovely little posy. They just had time to go in and fill in the forms with the registrar, who was in on the secret, and within an hour they were married!

adaline · 29/07/2018 09:29

I'm getting married in six weeks.

Four guests (both sets of parents and that's it) - DP's suit is from Matalan and my dress was less than £150 from Selfridges!

Registry office wedding with afternoon tea afterwards, then home. It's the ideal day for us :)

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