I’m a regular poster but have namechanged, mainly because this isn’t the first time I’ve posted about this and people are probably sick of it.
Ds 8 is having an operation on Friday, should be out Saturday. Will have a couple of weeks recovery, will be poorly but manageable, not really ill if all goes to plan.
My husband isn’t his biological dad but has been in his life since he was 2 (mine a lot longer). My mum has never warmed to him, gone from actively hostile to ignoring him completely.
DH was coming to the hospital with me and ds. We’re not overly worried but still want to both be there and have arranged work so that over the next 2 weeks we’re taking turns at home.
Dm lives minutes away and asked me to come round after work. DH has picked ds up from hers earlier. I had an idea what was coming so text DH to see if everything was ok. He said when he called to arrange picking him up she’d said if he needed to she would keep ds later, overnight if he wanted. DH said he was getting picked up first thing by a friend since they wouldn’t see each other for 2 weeks and ds had some stuff to do at home (had promise to tidy his room etc) so he would collect him when it suited.
I arrived at dms and her side of the story was very different. DH has ripped ds from her arms and broken her heart. And she knew it would be best for me to go to the hospital on my own so I wasn’t distracted. And she would pick me and ds up on Saturday and she’s nurse him at her house. It sounds mad because it is. I fought my corner as much as I could but she gets me all turned around.
Her house is bigger and she could be at home the entire 2 weeks where I would be working some of the time. But I’m his mum, I want him home with me, in his own bed.
I can’t think straight because she talks about co-parenting ds and it makes me upset. She’s a really good hands on granny but she’s not a parent. And i feel shit for saying that.
I rarely talk about it in real life because it’s hard to explain and people keep saying tell her to piss off but the fight that comes with that isn’t worth it.
This is a marathon post, sorry, but Aibu to say I’m his mum, I’m talking him Home and she can visit if she can keep a civil tongue in her head? Or is that too cruel if she’s worried about him?