To think chivalry is dead?

[CrispyBanger]

Got the train home today from London at rush hour. It was packed, not a spare seat to be had. At the front of the train there are always a few unreserved seats, including 3 sets of priority seating and 2 tables. I sat in a priority seat. Of the other priority seats, 3 were taken by men with a further 7 men in the table seats.

Obviously pregnant lady (with a baby on board badge for extra measure) got on and stood in the aisle as it was so packed. I looked around expecting someone i.e. a man to offer their seat but no one did. I stood up and she took my seat.

Now, obviously there's a slim chance that the other people in the priority seating had non-visible seating needs but it's unlikely they all did. Am I showing my age or is it no longer the done thing to offer a seat to the elderly/pregnant ladies etc?

Incidentally, when I stood in the aisle a man sat at the table offered me his seat . So he didn't feel like he should offer it to a heavily pregnant lady but he did to a an obviously non pregnant lady?

Someone should have offered a seat. It didn't have to be ie a man, that's just ridiculous.

Are you saying a man should have got up rather than you?

On the tube the other day I offered an older man my seat, he refused and I then felt awkward that he thought I'd decided he was elderly and was offended.

Is there any reason one of the men should offer their seat over you? Are you elderly?

Really? Is it not the done thing these days for it to be a man? I'd certainly hope my DS was more chivalrous than that.

[Ignoring all feminist arguments of course]

Me can use their penises for extra balance when standing, like a three legged stool. Everyone knows that.

Agree with polar, someone should have offered pregnant lady a seat, you did OP so you did the right thing, don't understand the emphasis on numbers of men on the train, irrelevant

Why are you ignoring the feminist arguments? I hope my son and daughter are kind and respectful to everyone.

Able bodied people should give up seats for the elderly, disabled or pregnant. It doesn't matter whether the able bodied person is male or female. Men aren't more capable of standing on a train than women. The men should have offered their seats to the pregnant lady as you did, but they didn't have more of a duty to do so than you by virtue of their being men.

Chivalry is an outdated concept.

Kindness is not. Someone should have offered the lady a seat. That person didn’t automatically have to be male

Why should a man give up his seat instead of a woman? I’d hope that the closest person would give up their seat, regardless of sex, unless they also had a priority need.

I wouldn't expect a man to get up just because he's a man, no. I'd expect all people to be aware of someone less capable of standing.

I'd hope my son grows up to be the sort of person that stands up for a pregnant lady. I hope that my daughter does too.

StealthPolarBear I love you for that comment about the third stabilising leg.

I bloody hope chivalry is dead. Women don't need special treatment on account of having ovaries. It's not men's gift to give out.

All for kindness and consideration though.

I'm with you op - Im afraid I don't want to be lumped in and equalised. I quite like being a lady and treated like one.

It is quite simple:

Gentlemen stand for ladies
The young stand for their elders
The able stand for those not so able

We used to call them 'manners' and common decency. Both sadly lacking today .

I once heard the expression "if women want equality, let them stand there and enjoy it"

Didn't equality kill chivalry?

I will stand there and enjoy it, and the benefits it brings for myself and my daughter

I think you are rather lacking in manners if you think you shouldn't have to give up your seat on account of being a woman. It's entitlement, that's all.

We used to call them 'manners' and common decency. Both sadly lacking today.

Ugh

I don't know anything about the gold standard chivalry, but I DO love kittens...

I don't want my daughter to be a laydeeee. I cannot think of anything worse.

What happened to the concept of chivalry?

I think it is on life support. Hopefully someone will pull the plug soon and put it out of its misery.

Yes let's replace chivalry with manners and decency. Given by all to all, according to need rather than genitalia.

Chivalry is just a stereotype and expectation placed on men. You can't reject one stereotype(women staying at home and working in the kitchen) but embrace another stereotype of men giving up seats for women who are perfectly capable of standing. That's very hypocritical of you, you're just choosing the stereotypes that benefit you.

Chivalry has been replaced by equality. No reason why someone should give up their sex because of their sex.