To think chivalry is dead?

[CrispyBanger]

Got the train home today from London at rush hour. It was packed, not a spare seat to be had. At the front of the train there are always a few unreserved seats, including 3 sets of priority seating and 2 tables. I sat in a priority seat. Of the other priority seats, 3 were taken by men with a further 7 men in the table seats.

Obviously pregnant lady (with a baby on board badge for extra measure) got on and stood in the aisle as it was so packed. I looked around expecting someone i.e. a man to offer their seat but no one did. I stood up and she took my seat.

Now, obviously there's a slim chance that the other people in the priority seating had non-visible seating needs but it's unlikely they all did. Am I showing my age or is it no longer the done thing to offer a seat to the elderly/pregnant ladies etc?

Incidentally, when I stood in the aisle a man sat at the table offered me his seat . So he didn't feel like he should offer it to a heavily pregnant lady but he did to a an obviously non pregnant lady?

@missbattenburg 😂 I adore that sketch

I don't think men should be more obliged to stand than women, but it's certainly sad that, of about 10 people in the vicinity of the pregnant woman, only person offered her a seat. Well done for being the one to do the right thing, OP.

I will stand there and enjoy it, and the benefits it brings for myself and my daughter

Quite. Seems a small price to pay.

Why are you ignoring all feminist arguments, obviously?

Presumably she doesn't vote, own property, work outside the home or ever contradict her husband.

@missbattenburg What a delightful thought, you dear, sweet, fragile little thing.

Chivalry;
1 - very polite, honest, and kind behaviour, especially by men towards women.

2 - the system of behaviour followed by knights in the medieval period of history, that put a high value on honour, kindness, and courage.
dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/chivalry

Did women asking for equal pay and an end to male violence really kill chivalry?

I’m with you OP. My DH doesn’t really sit down on tubes or buses unless there’s loads of seats because he would feel terrible sat there looking at any woman standing. My son who is 15 is the same, he would find it very awkward. Unless they have a disability or are overweight, the average man would find standing easier than a woman of the same age - very generally speaking.

Where's the OP?

Why does an average man find it easier to stand than a woman of the same age?

I refer you to my post of 20.57

I hate these outdated assumptions that it should be men who stand up to give up a seat. Why? Why should they be the ones to stand up while able bodied women sit? We want equality...I'm pretty sure use 'ladies' can stand to give up our seat to someone in more need. Just bask in the good-deed feel if nobody else offered!

Unless they have a disability or are overweight, the average man would find standing easier than a woman of the same age - very generally speaking

Why on earth would an average man find it easier to stand than an average woman of the same age

I’ve stood on a tube with crutches before - whilst people stared at me. I’ve sat on the floor of a GWR train with a baby on board badge on my coat.

People!

I can't believe we're still seeing posts like this. I'd have expected my son or daughter to give up those seat. I'd have given up my seat. I'd have expected my partner to give up his seat. And it has nothing to do with genitalia, more to do with one human carrying a large sack full of other human inside her. I'd have given up my seat to a pregnant elephant too, and it's not chivalry.

I hope chivalry is dead. Equality means equal. I'll take genuine equality over chivalry any day of the week.

Women rightly fought and still keep figting to have same rights and opportunities as men. But with that must logically come some responsibility too.
We can't expect to get all the good things, yet leave out some other parts.
Equality will never be fully on until people stop expecting others to do things, even as simple as giving up seat, based on one's genitals.

I actually think the man offering a seat is based an old fashioned logic that any woman of child bearing age could be pregnant and the bit where you feel tired and sick is at the start when it doesn't show. Women did used to have more babies on average.

She could also be menstruating. I spend 12 weeks a year feeling a bit crappy for that.

I obviously don't want to live in a world where women are treated with kid gloves in case they are pregnant or on their period and women know themselves if they are fine and can offer a seat.

Also, she could have book a seat.

I don't expect chivalry but I am impressed when I encounter it.

Men at my workplace are chivalrous to a fault.

*booked 🙄

Me can use their penises for extra balance when standing, like a three legged stool. Everyone knows that.

I wondered what the penis was for- I thought it was a picnic attachment- or a device for taking stones out of horse;s hooves.

Also, she could have book a seat.

Ha ha ha. Have you ever been on a London commuter train?

It's not a male female thing, it's a manners thing.

If you are more able to stand than a heavily pregnant woman then you should offer.

I see this frequently and it's always the women who offer their seats whilst the men do their best to look everywhere else.

“Why would an average man would find standing easier than a woman of the same age?”

Well I think women find standing for long periods more difficult - periods, less comfortable shoes, headaches / dizziness, varicose veins perhaps for some?

DH is 47 and I’m 41. If we’ve been traipsing around London all day and had to get a tube home, my legs will be killing me but his won’t. I would say this is common in most couples, unless obviously there are extenuating circumstances.