I'm your Mil ask me anything

[Milfromhades]

I don't think iabu to rearrange your knicker drawer, just being helpful! Any questions on how to be a good mummy or what amount of sugar is appropriate for a 2 year old?

How do you handle a MIL who doesn't give two craps about her DC. You must have friends that make you shudder when you know how they treat their DS/DC

I do know several ladies at church, just as you describe. I wouldn't call them friends, of course. Sadly some people can be rather self centred and there is very little you can say to help. I have perfected a rather haughty look and a sniff which I feel tells them they are no better than they ought to be.

Who is DH's Dad? He'd love to know.

Who is DH's Dad? He'd love to know
I know ds bears a passing resemblance to the late Micheal Winner, but this is a sheer coincidence and I can confirm your FiL is ds' true father.

Milfromhades bravo! This is great

Why didn't you thank me for the very thoughtful Rampant Rabbit I gave you for your birthday??

Why didn't you thank me for the very thoughtful Rampant Rabbit I gave you for your birthday??

Having met your family I now realise this is what passes for humour with your sort, and not a deliberate attempt to ruin my birthday as I first thought.
I would ask you to confine yourself to flowers, chocolates or maybe a scented candle, but having seen some of the vulgar products available I doubt it would do any good.

Oh wise and wonderful MIL with your years of child rearing expertise! How do I make my baby sleep?

Not everyone has my own natural ability with babies, I'm afraid. My dc all slept through within weeks. Little angels!
You will just have to accept you are what I like to call a 'good enough' mother and resort to the usual cuddling, pram pushing, car rides, vibrating baby chair, hammock swing and that sort of nonsense which we never had in my day.

Why do you continuously slate you own daughters in laws, for things that you do yourself.

Why do you love Joe Dolan and why did we have to watch the Joe Dolan special that was on the telly?

Also why do you ask us to visit you then sit there with the television blaring so loud that no one can hear themselves think, if I wanted to sit and watch shit tv at full volume I could have stayed at home.

Why do you continuously slate you own daughters in laws, for things that you do yourself.
If you are trying to compare my having one too many G&Ts and falling asleep on the odd occasion (and I do NOT snore) with your drunken antics at Cousin Louisa's wedding you are way off base. Poor old great uncle Joe didn't know where to look! Dearie me.

Why do you love Joe Dolan and why did we have to watch the Joe Dolan special that was on the telly?
You can take a girl out of Ireland ...

No I mean your daughters mother in law, your daughters husbands parents.

You are forever slagging them off for being interfering, unhygienic, upsetting your daughter, calling in inconvenient times.

You yourself are no better.

Also why do you ask us to visit you then sit there with the television blaring so loud that no one can hear themselves think, if I wanted to sit and watch shit tv at full volume I could have stayed at home.
Well you can't listen to Joe Dolan on low volume dear, it's just not the same.

Why did you spend so much of our relationship putting me down and criticising me? Do you realise what it actually did to me? CLUE: it didn't make me a better mother, it simply destroyed what little confidence I had.

No I mean your daughters mother in law, your daughters husbands parents. You are forever slagging them off for being interfering, unhygienic, upsetting your daughter, calling in inconvenient times.

Ah I see forget what I said about the gin, I am practically teatotal these days anyway.

As for my daughter's unfortunate outlaws I think they cross the line between loving concerned parent and interfering critical old battleaxe (as dd affectionately calls her own MiL) whilst with my natural charm I always keep the right balance. My DiLs know I am there to help, whether it be pointing out their wee parenting mistakes and explaining how I would do it, or popping round to give the place a good scrub and preparing DS favourite tea. Its all done with love and they appreciate that.

Why did you hire yourself a stretched limo to take yourself to my vintage themed wedding, it screamed look at me and you know what? Everybody did and laughed!

Why did you complain that I hadn't bought you a holiday the year I bought you a Radley handbag? Is a Radley handbag not enough?

Why did you hire yourself a stretched limo to take yourself to my vintage themed wedding, it screamed look at me and you know what? Everybody did and laughed!

Well I needed a good sized car to fit my enormous hat. But in retrospect a horse and carriage would have been more in keeping with the theme.

Why do you constantly pass judgement on the state of my house when you know I’ve seen under your kitchen units?

Why did you complain that I hadn't bought you a holiday the year I bought you a Radley handbag? Is a Radley handbag not enough?
I don't want to appear ungrateful but I'm just so spoiled with the lovely presents Fiona and family give me that it takes a slight adjustment to get used to your little offerings, but don't worry I know it's the thought that counts. That's why this year I have already bought you a barely used set of M&S smellies from the charity shop and a Cadbury selection box for the dc to share.

Why do you constantly pass judgement on the state of my house when you know I’ve seen under your kitchen units?

In my day a DiL would have offered to get the scrubbing brush and do under the units. With my poor old knees I can't be expected to crawl about down there. Dearie me.

My are you such a rasict twant

How did your recent dementia evaluation go?