to ask what DH does that really fucks you off?

[martapolska2]

But not to the point where you will LTB.

My DH insists on chucking all his beer can in the black bin and not a recycle bin!

Oh my God. Another one. He claims he doesn't know how to use our alarm clock. He's a fucking PROGRAMMER (and a very good one, too) but claims ignorance when it comes to the FUCKING ALARM CLOCK.

@ladybirdsaredotty Reading that makes me wonder if DH has another secret family

DS and I have actually moved into the spare room because DH's snoring is so bad. I didn't realise how bad because I used to wear earplugs but can't do that with DS.

And the Fun Dad thing! DS almost never cries around DH because they're always having fun and playing, whereas I'm Arsehole Mummy who makes him cry by doing dreadful things like putting his eczema cream on, getting him dressed/undressed, changing his dirty nappies

Doesn't listen to me. Then asks me to repeat myself, then stops listening when I do . Also will make out like he's listening, agreeing to things etc, and then days later it becomes apparent that he hadn't a clue what was actually said.

That and faffing - always making the rest of us wait.

Oh @findthegap - snap. I feel your pain.

Won’t be my husband until next year (still time to run - ha ha!) BUT:

Never puts new loo roll on holder, just balances on top;
Demonstrates no spacial awareness when loading the dishwasher;
Is SO forgetful am petrified he will leave our child (due in sept) somewhere;
Leaves his dirty clothes in another bathroom, waits until I’ve put a wash on (despite being asked if he has anything else) then fills basket so it’s overflowing;
Forgets to lock the back door;
Is such a brute that he breaks pretty much everything we own (new Brabantia bin broken within 2 weeks of purchase)

But I do love him

Sending me links to villas at 5am on the first day of the school holidays, waking up two of the dc

Eats raw onion & houmous sandwiches

Spends too much time on his phone.

Him being a moody git usually once a month (man period?). This morning he was being a moody git, and I pointed out that he was being a moody git (not nastily, I just said 'stop being moody') he accused me of being in a mood and said that I mustn't have had enough sleep he's less moody now though (I'm right)

My List, but I also recognise a lot of previous comments -

Cracking his knuckles while we are watching TV, even though he knows it drives me nuts
Stops cracking knuckles and then starts picking at fingernails/skin. When asked if he could stop he says 'it is because I gave up smoking' (20 years ago)
Always reorganises the dishwasher with lots of clattering and banging
Always asks me what the weather is like - look outside
Has got his reply/opinion ready before I have finished speaking and then cannot remember what we were saying
Does not remember the names of my friends - so he says you know, your friend - I say which one? Then gets pissed off because he cannot remember
Reads out all the signs on lorries etc when we are in the car
Tries to tell me which parking space is best - 'but I'm only trying to help'

And to those posters who say why are we enabling this behaviour? - because that is what is like living with a man who has not yet grown up. Work in progress

Narrates what he's doing when trying to fit something together, ie an ikea flat pack. It's amusing at first, but as the hours roll by....

Oh God, I am too scared to write all of this down as in one place it will sound like either he is a nightmare to live with.... or I am!

Eats cereal like an absolute savage - he will eat a whole bowl like he is scraping the last remnants out... the NOISE is deafening.
I swear his mouth is more echoey than any other person I know - I can be sat around a table with 10 other people and I will still hear him chewing! boke
Can never ever ever EVER be on time for anything, if we are relying on him we will always be late - like a pp he will leave it until 5 minutes before we are supposed to be leaving to take the worlds longest shit and shower. I reckon in the 10 years we have been together I have spent a year of that just waiting for him to be ready.
He spends a good 1.5-2 hours in the bathroom every day and god forbid I need to use the loo in that time.
He will not throw anything away - we have a loft, a spare room, a garage and what is supposed to be our new en-suite FULL of junk he has accumulated over the years and just can't bear to part with because a) he might need it one day or b) he might be able sell it on eBay for 50p
He is messy but a clean freak... leaves his shit lying around everywhere so my job of cleaning takes twice the amount of time it should because I need to move/redistribute/sneakily chuck away his shit first. My daughter is turning into him. So now there are two of them.
Moans at me when I move said shit to clean, but will also spot a 5 minute old spider web and accuse me of not cleaning!
Spends an incredible amount of time 'working' but I do his accounts... it doesn't add up!

Aside from all of that he is a wonderful Dad, reliable (unless it is time related!) and I do love him to bits... I just wish he could be tweaked a little bit!

AgentCooper

I just remembered another one..

"Where is my..." ALL THE TIME. CONSTANTLY. I've realised now if I don't respond, within 3 seconds I hear a "oh there it is" LOOK FIRST!!

Oh AND! Moans the whole time I'm getting ready about how long it takes then waits for me to be ready and standing at the front door then commences the search for phone, wallet, car keys. Also has to go to the toilet. I've noticed his dad does this as well, drives the MIL mad too!

He consistently misplaces his wallet, phone, keys, and belt. Unfortunately they don't make a Tile for belts.

I’m back again.

Often automatically will say ‘sorry?’ as if he hasn’t heard. I used to repeat myself all the feckin time- he blames bad hearing. But i have now worked out that if i wait rather than repeat he magically works out what i have said. So i think its just laziness, he cant be arsed to listen the first time.

I'm so relieved it's not just me!

Some of these are dreadful!!

Snoring here, but so loud everyone's awake. Gets cross when I ask him to roll over. Really need separate rooms with a connecting door.

Everything is done soooooooo slowly. It may be perfectly planned and resourced and done to the highest specifications but it takes for ever and means I have to do most of the general household shit!!!

If i occasionally ick him up on something inappropriate/plain wrong he's said to kids he'll laugh which gives me the RAGE.

I'll clean the kitchen worktop etc. He'll make a piece of toast and leave breadboard, crumbs, knife out for what, the fairy cleaners???!!!

How do you guys not constantly loose your temper?!. I'm struggling. Age doesn't help!

Everytime he sneezes, snot comes out. It's not normal and it's repulsive.
He puts milk in my tea when the teabag is still in there.
He forgets his house keys all the time and so I have to let him in, that one makes me especially (irrationally) angry.
He says "see you in a bit" EVERY time he leaves the room.
Also the standard being unable to see the washing basket, empty the dishwasher, hang up his clothes, normal "man shit".

Has to drive around car park looking for optimum spot, record has been about 10 mins. In which time we could have parked anywhere and walked to the shop door and back. I don't even point out parking spots any more, just sit silently as we 'tour' the car park, internally rolling my eyes. 😂

(1) starts jobs and does 90-95% but leaves the last little bit, and leaves all the tools etc out because it's not finished yet, and they stay there for months until i crack and put them away (and then he decides that i've signed off on the job and it's finished)

(2) empties the dishwasher apart from the things that are too complicated to put away, like a cheese grater or a tupperware container

(3) refuses to use the last bit of something so gets a new one out when the old one isn't finished eg loo roll, leaving the last tenth or so loo roll on the holder (so not like just last two sheets) but a new opened roll on the floor. similar with jars of things

REFUSES to fill in gaps in convos

For example I’m out painting the shed, he’ll ask me where something is, I’ll say ‘next to the gate I was painting’ so he’ll go and look by the gate, ignore the shed and then sort of rib me about it ‘we’ll you said gate’

That’s a bad example but just one, he’s like a child in that respects, he will NEVER just finish a sentence or assume what we are discussing to make my life easier. So I’m thinking of 99 things a minute and he can’t hold one in his brain ‘oh I think we’ll pop in here’ - ‘for what?’

FOR THE FUCKING THING WE HAVE JUST BEEN CONVERSING ABOUT OBVIOUSLY.

It temporarily makes me want to kill hin

REFUSES to fill in gaps in convos

For example I’m out painting the shed, he’ll ask me where something is, I’ll say ‘next to the gate I was painting’ so he’ll go and look by the gate, ignore the shed and then sort of rib me about it ‘we’ll you said gate’

That’s a bad example but just one, he’s like a child in that respects, he will NEVER just finish a sentence or assume what we are discussing to make my life easier. So I’m thinking of 99 things a minute and he can’t hold one in his brain ‘oh I think we’ll pop in here’ - ‘for what?’

FOR THE FUCKING THING WE HAVE JUST BEEN CONVERSING ABOUT OBVIOUSLY.

It temporarily makes me want to kill him

thenewaverage point out to him that I had an eye op as a baby, and my eyeballs have never dropped out when I blew my nose. 😂

Cannot hang things up in the wardrobe.
Asks the same thing over and over (he has anxiety and worries too much).