To think you don't have a party at home beyond 11pm?

[critiqueofeveryday]

Neighbours in the next street (!) had a party on Saturday night in their garden. The noise started out at reasonable levels at 7pm. Predictably, as they drank into the night, voices got louder, and then the turned up the music to compensate.

We have really, really good double glazing and external insulation. We had all the windows shut, and we were still kept awake until they finally decided to pack up at 3am.

AIBU to think that's it's unacceptable to have loud, late night parties at home? I mean, this is literally what late night licensed pubs and bars are for, right? Why, why, why have it in your own garden, when you must know you are disturbing a whole neighbourhood?

thecats - those are sensible rules, actually

It is a pain when party noise interrupts your sleep, but if it's a one-off I say live and let live. Some people aren't aware how much their noise travels and don't mean to cause upset.

If it is a regular thing I would have a word, but I think a one-off party in the big scheme of things can be forgiven.

Gosh, we have 2 or 3 parties at home a year, and we're definitely not done by 11!

I would however, turn the music down, shut windows and doors and make sure no one was outside making lots of noise beyond around 11ish. And I also invite my neighbours :) :)

Life is meant to be a bit more fun than ending parties at 11 (or not having them at home at all!) A few times a year is fine IMO, but they should have relocated inside at 11/12ish, and kept an eye on noise levels.

You can't really have a housewarming party at a venue
Or a barbecue
Or a garden party
Yabvu

Ha ha. YABVU. I go to house parties all the time. And have them at least twice, or 3 times a year at, our house. Yes and I am considerate to others, but I think your rules are unreasonable.
People are perfectly entitled to have parties at home. Why shouldn't people?
People have childrens parties. Tonnes of kiddies running around. Why shouldn't we have people round? In the evening.
Who said those were the rules? I disagree.

Cheap and skanky to have a party in your house ?!

Get a grip FFS. It's perfectly acceptable to have a house party every so often.

Sound can sometimes travel in unexpected ways. A little while back a neighbour had a party for their DD's 18th; dj, sound system, the works. It was loud, but given it was an unusual occurrence and a special occasion, wouldn't have dreamed of making a fuss. However, another neighbour assumed the noise was coming from somewhere else and a friend received a letter from the council complaining about the noise that her son's party made (coincidentally on the same night, but a much smaller, quieter affair in comparison)! Not for no reason at all that this complaining neighbour is known as Mrs Bouquet round here!

Childrens' parties are fine - they don't go on til 3am and stop everyone from sleeping.

House parties are just cheap and horrible. Go out to a proper place.

Cheap and horrible? How?

Meh. Live and let live. Nowt wrong with the occasional party. Why not have one yourself. Cheer yourself up:-)

I think that the occasional late party is fine but you should try and keep the noise down after 11pm. Our neighbours have a loud late party for their son's b'day once a year but always give us warning and it is just once a year (they get our noise through the party wall all year round).

critiqueofeveryday

House parties are just cheap and horrible. Go out to a proper place.

Not hearing what you want?

Can’t imagine anyone wanting to end a party at 11.

Then do t host a party at your house if you live near people.

Basic ‘how to not be obnoxious’ behaviour surely?

Keeping people awake because you want a party is selfish in the extreme.

Because you're asking the entire neighbourhood to remain awake til 3am just so you can have some fun (which is horrible for everyone else).

I am childless, so I have a lot of late nights. I go out to restaurants, bars, clubs, and party venues (you know, bespoke places that you can hire that put on booze and food) away from my home precisely so I'm not inflicting my lifestyle on neighbours.

Unfortunately assuming you are UK based OP for every decent considerate person there are at least 25 utter scroates who don't even register that their behaviour impacts others. Scum culture sadly prevails.

ODFOD.

Would have loved to have had DS's 18th birthday party anywhere but our house, given the mess I had to clear up, but as his birthday falls quite early in the school year, it would have meant most of his friends wouldn't be able to have a drink, which he didn't want. It finished around midnight; were we BU to have a party at home?

House parties are just cheap and horrible

No, they are really not. They are a nice thing to do, an opportunity to welcome friends and neighbours into your home to share food and drink with you.

Being kept up at 3am isn't nice, but that is not typical of most house parties.

You really should have gone round (at about midnight or so) and asked your neighbours to keep the noise down last night.

It's perfectly acceptable to have a house party every so often.

Not if prevents other people from sleeping it’s not. Your want for a party doesn’t trump other people’s need for sleep.

Oh, I have parties at home. Lovely drunken ones.

But music outside after 11 and loud music indoors after about midnight just hasn't featured since I was a teenager.

Nobody misses it - we carry on drinking, chatting, playing games etc. My house doesn't have anything approaching a dancefloor, so it's not a proper party anyway!

I agree if you want to really have a loud and rowdy party you can book somewhere. Certainly, where I live, all the function rooms are available for a nominal fee.

"Being kept up at 3am isn't nice, but that is not typical of most house parties."

I have no problem with parties ending before 11, or parties where the noise is severely restricted after 11 (as many PPs have suggested, this is a considerate thing to do). Since no-one other than those involved would know the latter type were happening I can't see how anyone would object.

My point is: if you want a loud, late night do... go elsewhere.

My parents used to have parties all the time, but given most of the neighbours were invited, don't think anyone would have complained!
Quite clearly you are such an unpleasant person in your neighbourhood that no one wants to invite you to their party!

YABU

So no one who cant afford to hire a venue ever gets to celebrate their special occasion at home? Not on New Year.. not their milestone birthday? no... they should all just go to bed at 11..

Id understand if it were someone doing it every night.... but once in a while... its just a party! If it gets a bit much knock on the door or put a note thru and hopefully if they are reasonable people they will tone it down or at least think of the neighbours a bit more if they ever want to do it again.

People use their homes to live their lives... sometimes that involves noise.... look at the bigger picture and asses how much noise they are making over time... not over just one night....

Some people are inconsiderate and antisocial..... and some people just have the odd party once in a blue moon that goes on a bit longer than 11.... there is a difference!!

They're not my immediate neighbours betty - they live on the next street. I' live in a city, not a small village where everyone knows each other - Ive never met them.

You sound very highly strung OP

Get an early night

"So no one who cant afford to hire a venue ever gets to celebrate their special occasion at home? Not on New Year.. not their milestone birthday? no... they should all just go to bed at 11.."

Of course they do. It doesn't cost much to hire a venue.