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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask to drop DC at a party early?

440 replies

TrickyTrickTrick · 16/06/2018 09:07

DC (8) has been invited to a party. It is on the same day as a local event we were planning on attending as a family (we already have tickets for it). DC is desperate to go as it is one of their good friends. If relevant tickets purchased last week, invite is only a week's notice from party date.

I know the mum to say 'hi' to, occasional playground chat, the friend has been here for dinner etc but I do not know the mum 'well' as such. She seems nice, but quite shy/quiet.

Party is about 10 mins from the local event, it is a party at the child's house. I would also have to dip out of event early to collect DC and then re-park at event and re-enter. So probably missing about 45mins ish of the event.

WIBU to ask the mum if i could drop DC half an hour early? This would allow us to get to the event close to the time we originally planned to get there (we have other DC who are excited to go to the event), so only disrupting our family day out in the middle when I go to collect, rather than at the start as well.

WIBU to ask her? or does this make me a CF?!

OP posts:
raviolidreaming · 16/06/2018 21:19

Bravo, party mum!

Starlight345 · 16/06/2018 21:30

Well glad that’s sorted

FrayedHem · 16/06/2018 21:30

Yay!

Ski40 · 16/06/2018 21:40

Lol well done, glad it all turned out ok. We were a bit in suspense here. I hope you all had a lovely time 🤩

Pancakeflipper · 16/06/2018 22:48

hurrah - I will sleep well now I know all is well

SE13Mummy · 16/06/2018 23:02

Glad you got it sorted. We've had DD2's party today and one of her friends was dropped half an hour early because her big sister needed to be elsewhere at the same time. When the mum asked if that would be possible, I told her she was welcome to drop her anything up to two hours early if that would make things easier. DD2 was delighted to have a friend here early and they occupied each other.

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 16/06/2018 23:53

party mum says its absolutely fine for me to drop DC early

Of course she did. Like the majority of women would have done.

Glad it's sorted now OP.

Cheto · 16/06/2018 23:53

@TrickyTrickTrick take that u weird overthinking peoplesGrin ...
Nice one, hope u all enjoy your day Smile

Lostthefairytale · 17/06/2018 00:16

If course she said it was fine because only in mumsnet would it be an issue.

cherrryontop · 17/06/2018 01:57

Only crazy uptight parents on Mumsnet would make an issue of something like this. Of course she said yes, all normal people would if it was doable.

tomhazard · 17/06/2018 08:09

Ha well done OP. Of course it's fine because it's such a minor thing.

In my world I do favours for people when they're stuck and vice Versa- I don't find everything cf!

Clubcuts · 17/06/2018 08:13

Sorted! Non issue! Well done OP.

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 17/06/2018 08:37

Glad she agreed!
Hopefully if she had said No, posters on here wouldn't have all called her a "crazy uptight abnormal mum" because obviously that would be plain nasty. Grin

Hope he enjoys the party.

Branleuse · 17/06/2018 09:07

I'm glad it's all fine x

Figgygal · 17/06/2018 09:12

Glad she's agreed
For what it's worth and this point id have asked too and would have offered if I was party mum

Stompythedinosaur · 17/06/2018 10:17

"I had dd1's best friend 3 hours early for her 7th birthday a few weeks back, and kept her until the next afternoon (due to a tricky work situation)"
Because that is ^exactly the same........

How bloody necessarily rude!

Nothing in my post is saying it is an identical situation, that's why I explained my own experience (that I would do it as a favour, but that it was a pain).

I didn't realise only people who had provided extra childcare ariund parties for the exact length of time the op has were welcome to comment!

Op, I am happy you are sorted.

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 17/06/2018 10:28

Hopefully if she had said No, posters on here wouldn't have all called her a "crazy uptight abnormal mum" because obviously that would be plain nasty

Saying no without a reason? Just because?

MyOtherUsernameisaPun · 17/06/2018 10:33

I wouldn't mind if someone asked me this, not sure why everyone is making a big deal about it!

BertrandRussell · 17/06/2018 10:36

If she had said no without a reason-and I actually can't think of an adequate reason- I would have thought that she was being entirely unreasonable.

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 17/06/2018 10:49

Come on Bertrand you can't go through life thinking everyone thinks the same as you. Have some imagination. If you started a thread;

"I asked a mum if I could drop my son early to her party and she said No.

Is she being unreasonable?"

How do you think that'd go? I dare you to try it. Wink

Dungeondragon15 · 17/06/2018 11:06

Hopefully if she had said No, posters on here wouldn't have all called her a "crazy uptight abnormal mum" because obviously that would be plain nasty.

I wouldn't call her that but if it was just a flat "no" without a reason I might think it.

BertrandRussell · 17/06/2018 11:36

“Come on Bertrand you can't go through life thinking everyone thinks the same as you. Have some imagination.“

No. But I can go through life expecting decent civilized behaviour from other people.

BertrandRussell · 17/06/2018 11:37

and objecting to mean spiritedness whenever I find it,

SheGotBetteDavisEyes · 17/06/2018 11:45

If she had said no without a reason-and I actually can't think of an adequate reason- I would have thought that she was being entirely unreasonable

There could be all kinds of reasons, some of which posters have mentioned upthread. Come on, don't we all know better than to judge one tiny glimpse at someone's actions without knowing a single thing about them or their lives?

and objecting to mean spiritedness whenever I find it

I don't think that someone saying 'no' if they didn't want to do it is mean-spirited. They could have spent the whole week helping out other people and be a exceptionally kind person. To judge on one 'no' might well be unfair.

BertrandRussell · 17/06/2018 11:49

“I don't think that someone saying 'no' if they didn't want to do it is mean-spirited. They could have spent the whole week helping out other people and be a exceptionally kind person. To judge on one 'no' might well be unfair.”
Really? Something so trivial and which will benefit her own child? Nope. Not an exceptionally kind person.

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