to think it's not normal to leave washing up over night?

[BigMamaTee]

Had to have words with DP tonight...

Can anyone please tell me if I'm being unreasonable or not in thinking that:

• surfaces should be wiped after use (not 3 days later)
• if you cook on the hob and get oil everywhere you should clean it (same day)
• you don't leave washing up overnight to get smelly and gross
• nor do you leave bits of food floating in the drain catcher in the sink when you can just put them straight in the bin
• it's not normal to do not one bit of cleaning in the week and to just mop a floor or give a surface a wipe on a Sunday

AIBU in expecting DP to do the above? I'm not a clean freak but I like the house to be clean. I'm torn between leaving his shit for him to do and it building up all week for him to half heartedly clean on the weekend, or to just clean it myself and be happy my house is clean but to want to nut him for being so lazy....

Here, here, Christmas Tablecloth.

It's grotesque how people are abusing the environment and their immune systems by an over reliance on excessive cleaning products.

YANBU. Never, ever go to bed without washing up. No matter how tired/ill/drunk you are.

I keep seeing this thread title and I cannot fathom how people think there is a 'normal' about this.

We are all gloriously different in our approach to housework! There is no normal!

I've left it overnight when I've been to too tired.

Or forgot to turn on the dishwasher.

NC

I'm with you OP! I crack up several times a week at DH for all of the above as he is always a 'I'll do it later' guy! Yet later never comes! And so I always end up having to do it after dinner or the next morning before work!
Tbh I may not be as stringent about it if I didn't have a dog walker coming into my house and filling my dogs water bowl at the sink every day.......

I was thinking this exact thing this morning after coming down to another half arsed job by DP. The deal is I cook and he does the kitchen, but he never does it properly and thinks I’m nit picking.

He will never empty yucky food remain from the sink catcher or wipe down the hob/splashback. His attempt at wiping the surfaces are quite half arsed and will always leave pools of water by the sink which has warped the work top and his washing up is often questionable.

It’s the kitchen FGS, the one room where hygiene is actually fairly important but he just doesn’t get it, he’s actually very clean and tidy around the rest of the house so I let him off and just get ragey every morning I see it

Dirty dishes go in a bowl of hot water and are left in the sink overnight. In the morning I let the dog out, fill the kettle, pour away the dirty water and wash the dishes with fresh hot water and put in the draining rack to dry. I then pour the kettle into the teapot, make sandwiches for any takers, box up into packed lunch bags, then pour out the tea.
Makes life simpler if the plates are soaked as it's more a case of just rinse off than a hard work wash-up!

YANBU!!!
I'm astonished at people calling you uptight because you can't stand 5 days worth of dirty dishes!
We often eat latish but washing up is done as I cook and my sink is clean and shiny before I go to bed. Even when I am ill-I couldn't get up to a messy kitchen.
My kitchen is small though-no dishwasher-and I have worked as a chef so maybe the evening clean up is ingrained.
Anyway-YOU ARE NORMAL and you can take that to the bank.

my sink is clean and shiny before I go to bed. - You see, that is not normal to me at all. I think that's very, very odd.

If we didn't have a dishwasher I doubt me and DP would still be together. He would use absolutely every last item of crockery, etc before washing up and I can't stand that kind of slovenliness. At least with a dishwasher it's hidden until the machine is full and you put it on.

Why do you think that's odd daisy? I'm interested to know...

My Belfast sink is also clean and shiny when I go to bed. I would hate a grubby sink.

It is not in the least bit odd; in fact, the opposite is true.

I wouldn't care whether my sink was shiny. I'm certainly not going to waste my time making it shiny, but each to their own!

Hear hear...

I do it after I've eaten because I'm lazy.
If I don't do it then (which takes 5 mins, only my plate + 1-2 pans and a toddler plate plus cutlery) food dries on and it takes 15 min the next day because I have to really scrub to get it off...

I'm with you OP.

I used to live with my boyfriend in my very early 20s and basically lived like a complete pair of slatterns and wash up either whenever we felt like it or on demand whenever we needed a clean plate etc!

One day I went to work and forgot my door key and basically locked myself out of the house.

My boss helpfully gave me a lift home and helped me to break into my house through the kitchen window which was facing the kitchen sink. I was shamed when I saw his face at the sight of the carnage in the kitchen sink, worktops etc.

Since then I never left the pots til the morning and now 20 years on I am a total clean freak.

Dishwasher has to be loaded, worktops wiped and hob cleaned. The only exception to the rule is if we have had friends round for a meal and it's ridiculously late and we are ridiculously pissed

I like a clean kitchen but avoid anti bacterial products. If I've cleaned the counters thoroughly with water, a clean cloth and an non-anti bac product that is more than enough to stay healthy. Bleach has no place in a clean kitchen either. The only time I might resort to it is if the plug area has become discoloured.

It is annoying how many products now are anti-bacterial. We need healthy bacteria in our lives and bodies to keep us healthy and these products do not discriminate between the healthy good bacteria and the unhealthy ones.

You really can clean everything in a kitchen with hot water, steam, a bit of washing up liquid and soda crystals if necessary. I use ecover spray on the worktops and a wood floor cleaner. And old t shirts cut up for dusters/cloths. I really get uncomfortable around clean freakery.

I don’t understand why you’d leave dirty washing up overnight. Either it sits in water, where you then have to put your hand in to get the plug out and empty it - urgh or it sits on the side where the food dries on and makes it far harder to clean.

Mine does neither. I rinse anything waiting before putting it on the washing up pile, same as I rinse things before putting in the dishwasher (a whole other thread )

Of course you wash up the night before, so you don't wake up to dried on disgusting plates and flies

WatchingWithInterest this is entirely a figment of your imagination. I've never seen flies on things waiting to be washed up. ... and anything else is quite frankly lazy and dirty. No it's not. You might not like it, but it is well within normal limits to leave some things to be washed another day. Lots of people either just want to relax, or are rushing out to something, or busy doing another job etc. You seem to struggle with the concept of different strokes for different folks and might want to relax your judgey pants a bit. IMO, bleaching the sink everyday is completely OTT, well, bleaching the sink AT ALL but I can understand that we're all different and if that makes you happy, and you don't care about pouring all those toxins into the water stream, then you should crack on.

Hope you're all enjoying your washing up this morning!

What I don't understand is why people pile everything in the sink only to have to take it all out again to wash it. I find the manky water grim.

I load the dishwasher every night and switch it on. Bits that don't, or can't go in, are left as neatly as possible on the side until they fit in the dishwasher the next day, or there are enough of them to warrant it being worth while to bother washing up.

What I don't understand is why people pile everything in the sink only to have to take it all out again to wash it. I find the manky water grim

I hate this too. Why does anyone think they are being helpful by putting dirty crockey in the sink? It always ends up covered in manky water when other things have been rinsed or emptied into the sink.

We have a clear space of worktop above the dishwasher for things to go to await loading. For most things I prefer them to wait there, rather than being put in the dishwasher, because if they are put in the dishwasher in dribs and drabs, I usually have to rearrange things to get as much as possible in it.

Cleaning up any mess is a must, but I always leave the washing up until the next day. Everything is rinsed and soaked (not left soaking overnight thought. Boak)

I'm currently on ML though. When I'm at work then we try to get it done that night.

Your mistake, as I can see you've realised, is in thinking that what YOU do is "normal". It's normal for you, but not for your partner. :)

It's not normal for me either; but it is for my MIL.
However, her habits have not rubbed off on DH and he's like your DP - I can't have washing up hanging around all week, it drives me bats, but I can't be doing with jumping up after a meal and doing it then either.
We do have a dishwasher and everything that can go in it goes straight in - but pots and that might get left for a couple of days (or longer if it's DH's turn). It was worse until I started a straight "taking turns" rule for the washing up - now DH knows that the longer he leaves it, the more there will be, so it's in his own interests to do it sooner. He never cleans the stove though, that's always "my job" for some reason