Why some women think it's not there job!!

[Damnivy]

Ok so this doesn't apply to those women who can't/shouldn't be doing these things. And I'm not saying this is about all women. (I also know a man like this).

I'm so bored of listening and watching women who can't do things for them selves.
Like.. washing windows (outside), Mowing the lawn, getting in the loft, putting flat packs together, putting diesel in their car. All things iv heard that are apparently a 'man's job'.
Other things like, my SIL never being able to sort her baby out on her own, while out, always dragging DB of to the baby change, if she needs changing, although if it's my DBs turn to change the baby he goes and does it alone.
My sister apparently can't do the food shopping alone as she can't push the trolley and shop at the same time. She also refuses to do any decorating as it's a 'man's job' and even though she has never tried doing it, just knows she wouldn't be able too.
Makes me wonder how some women would ever cope alone.
I'm not saying my DH doesn't do these things, but I would never ask him to cut the grass, fill my car ext.. unless I had a good reason. We split things like most couples, if he is working more hours one week, I do most of the house/childcare stuff, if I'm working more hours then he does it.
I know I sound judgy, and I probably am, I would never say anything about this to them as I don't like to interfere, just really annoyed after watching my sister acting like she cant do anything today!
I wasn't brought up independent, I come from a family who mostly all have these views, many women in my family have never worked, as they belive they should be home with the children. Iv learnt to be independent.
Why are some women like this, and what things have you heard women say they can't do, as they cant/wouldn't be any good at/or class it as 'men's job's'.

I think it's because there had to be some division of labour and some things that don't fall to the woman to remember and plan for in a fair relationship. These are usually the things men are more willing to do and therefore they get to do them.

In my experience though, men are generally shit at doing stuff. Much better results doing it oneself.

I do all the jobs, pink and blue! Every job is a purple job I guess.

One of my friends was aghast when I told her I was going home to mow the grass. She said in her household grass mowing is a "blue job". If I left the grass mowing to my dh we'd end up with a jungle in our back garden. I also do most of the diy. The only thing I hate doing is taking the car to be MOT'd or serviced as garages make me feel very uncomfortable and out of my depth. Obviously I do it if I have to but generally dh sorts out the car stuff.

Maybe they have the men do it because normally the men do very little in their home? If I'm doing all the cooking , cleaning, washing etc then he better be atleast taking the rubbish out.

In reality I end up doing all the DIY because my partner is lazy and I don't like to wait around for him to get to it.

My exH was always surprised I could put together flat pack furniture or use a drill or change my own oil in my car but attributed it to me being American rather than living alone and learning skills prior to him. Apparently none of the women in his family ever mastered any skills beyond cooking and cleaning, which is fine if that’s how they wanted to divide the labor with their partners. For what it’s worth, he couldn’t clean a toilet or figure out the ironing board so he shouldn’t have been marveling at women’s inability to learn certain skills in my opinion.

I don't mow the lawn or do DIY. I am extremely clumsy, and I can't draw a straight line with a ruler!

You rarely find a husband that doesn’t drive and the wife driving everywhere.

Waves.

Dh can drive, but I do all the driving.

I get the division of labour due to someone being better at something than the other person. I don't get the women or men who won't even try to do things. And I definitely don't get the women who refuse to drive places or don't like being in the house alone. I say women because I don't know any men like that.

Your DSis sounds quite clever actually, she's got it sussed! To be honest, when my ex-h was here, he did all the sorts of jobs you mention, he was a builder so any sort of DIY/garden stuff largely came down to him. I did all the other stuff. However, since divorce, I've had to get a grip and learn things myself. I've often had to ask for help, I am not ashamed of that, it will just be things I know sod all about or are not qualified to do. However, I do realise that I am perfectly capable with most things and like your sister, I just didn't want to do them and didn't have to either!

Oh and I literally do not want to do flatpack. So I have a lovely neighbour who does it for me

I think the people you know are slightly odd. I've never experienced this!
My DP does certain jobs like putting the bins out and cutting the grass because I don't want to and I do other jobs. It's not because they're gender specific tho ...

I can do pretty much anything I put my mind to but when I have a choice there are things I choose not to do... my hubby will sort the ‘men’s’ jobs as you put them, he loves mowing the lawn and the outdoor stuff, he knows on a Monday he has a wardrobe full of amazingly ironed shirts to choose from, I hate ironing and the rest but he hates it more so it’s a trade off. However, if I had to do the rest, I could, and would xx

Simon - but he still can drive

There are certain things I choose not to do and vis versa for dh. He’s much more proficient at mowing and doing the bins than the washing and ironing and we are both happy to do these respective jobs. When I was able bodied I did much more stuff like painting and decorating. Dh otoh hates it in the same way that I have always hated gardening but to say you can’t do something, which doesn’t require much skill such as filling up a car, that’s just silly unless there’s a general physical impairment.

I think it's important to be able to do for yourself, but maybe these women find it's the only way they can get their partners to do stuff?

I wish I knew why I have turned out this way but I am one of those women.... or was until I realised and sorted it out. One day a lightbulb blew when I had friends over and I said that we'd have to put the lamps on, sorry it was a bit dark. My friend asked why I didn't just change the bulb and it truly had not even occurred to me that I could possibly do it. Same with pumping up tyres on my car, always got husband to do it, it is in face the easiest thing on earth but it never even occurred to me to try until one day my husband told me to do it.

I'm making sure I teach my girls not to be the same!!

IMO your SIL drags your B to the baby change to talk in some sort of privacy - maybe about judgey relatives! Perhaps she is being polite, not incompetent. Some people don’t feel all the dull but necessary tasks of everyday life should not be done solely by one person so they find ways to get their partner involved - damn their devious ways! We designate tasks according to attitude, ability and aptitude in our home not gender.

These were all things I didn't do when I lived at home with my parents. Mind you I didn't do much of anything then! Mum did the so-called "female" jobs, and Dad did the ones you listed. Once I moved into my first house I learnt to do them. Some people go from living with their parents to moving in with a partner and just take on the same roles. I suppose if you've always had someone there to cut the grass or put together flat-pack, why worry about it?

All women are capable of all those household jobs unless they are too ill or have a disability stopping them. What it is is that they dont want to do them and prefer their husbands/partner to do them.
I've done all the decorating in my house, tiled the bathroom, dug all the garden planted stuff, trimmed massive bushes etc. A lot of it is tedious and if someone said they do it for nothing them I'd let them.

What's worse is when people get pissy when women do 'blue jobs'. My parents slagged DH off for weeks when I did some decorating over the summer!
I'm a teacher and the kids were in nursery full time. How dare I pick up a paint brush in my own house!

I don't cut the grass. If DH didn't do it I'd get a gardener. My DH is really good at DIY, electricals, gardening and flat packs.

Flat packs can be tricky to assemble as well. I can do simple small ones...but I wouldn't be able to do anything complex.

Life won't end because I can't assemble a flat pack... or do the gardening.

Surely it's more important to be able to do life's daily tasks like cooking and laundry.

I am a single mum so I do everything. No choice.

Even when I was married I refused to accept man/woman jobs although jobs that require strength are v tricky when you aren't that strong.

Is it the way they are brought up?
I'm sure my dad wanted a boy, and I did a lot of stuff with him - even roofing (until I got too old and he didn't like the attention I was getting from labourers on site).
I'll have a crack at anything. The internet is a great resource for things you've never done. I do my own DIY - can do basic electrics and plumbing as well (went on a course - would love to do plastering next but can never find a suitable evening course). Can build my own computers, fix my own bikes, do basic car maintenance etc. Next project is putting down some more laminate flooring. Thankfully I'm quite strong for a "girl", and if I find anything difficult, there's always a way around it.
I'm getting some stick at the moment for doing things like this when I'm pregnant though. I've agreed not to do any heavy lifting, but I can't see how painting the skirtings etc is in any way considered "over doing it".

My partner on the other hand is useless. Don't think he can even put a curtain rail up. He's pretty handy with a paint brush though, although I think he doesn't take as much care as I would do. He'll clean, but I think he does a crap job so would rather do it myself. Don't think he has ever used a lawn mover in his life either.

I find women that can't do anything for themselves, and won't even try quite pathetic. Wouldn't tell them to their face though, it's up to them how they live their lives.

I hate the smell of petrol station to the point it made me heave in pregnancy, and I still leave that as dh job (I have done it twice in past two years, so not like will never do it) but everything else I have no problem doing.

My absolute pet hate is when we go to the top and all the wives are just sat in the passenger seat of the car!! Husband is labouring away pulling a car full of rubbish out the boot and hoarding it up steps into the bins.

Last week we went 4 times and on one visit I counted 4 women sat in the car just facing forward, I'm 33 weeks pregnant and doing my part (granted, I was only allowed by DH to carry light stuff like cardboard and empty tubs of paint!) but still, it baffles me.