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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not have a bedroom

186 replies

MyBedroom · 06/06/2018 23:01

So DH is moving out, it's just me and the three DCs. Two boys, one girl. They're are 6,5,2.

We live in a 2 bed, right now the DD and DS share a room and DS2 sleeps in my bedroom in the travel got. When DH moves out, I'm planning on decorating the whole house and give DD my bedroom, and I will sleep on the sofa. I might buy her a bunk bed so I can sleep in the bottom bunk, if I want to sleep in a bed.

But hoping to move out in 3-4 years, so has anyone here given up their bedroom and sleep on the sofa?

OP posts:
Danniz · 09/06/2018 20:56

If I see another "girly" or "boyish" bedroom [mutters darkly].

Miladamermalada · 09/06/2018 20:57

Yes of course they should have been gender neutral browns and creams. No buying into those pesky gendered constructs.
FFS this shit is everywhere

MyOtherProfile · 10/06/2018 09:03

Would gender neutral blues or greens or pinks be ok?

Danniz · 10/06/2018 09:11

Yes - what on earth is wrong with blue/yellow/red/green/white and if you want child specific decorating go for animals. Why make such a big deal out of the difference in your children's sex at such a young age. To the extent that your daughter won't have the fun and closeness of sharing a room with her brothers and is forced to share with her mum. Seems quite unhealthy to me. And have you actually asked your daughter would she would like, without making it clear what you expect her answer to be?

Miladamermalada · 10/06/2018 10:58

Seems quite unhealthy to me
Most kids in the country separate bedrooms by sex and many have gender specific themes. I think your definition of 'unhealthy' may itself be unhealthy.
On every other thread on MN posters are horrified by boys entering girls spaces. OP has left a relationship and wants her kids to have nice bedrooms.
No matter what parents do these days their kids are 'deprived'
Gives kids a sense of entitlement which won't be helpful in adulthood imo

Danniz · 10/06/2018 12:08

DD is 6 and her brothers are younger, fgs.

Miladamermalada · 10/06/2018 13:15

fgs.
Do you have issues?
Many little girls like princesses. Many little boys like trains or dinosaurs. Maybe OP's kids are like that and she wants to decorate bedrooms accordingly.
Perhaps she should 'force' them to have gender neutral themes they don't even like in the efforts to avoid gender socialisation.

Mxyzptlk · 10/06/2018 13:36

Have a chat with the kids, especially DD, about their views on who has what space and how they'd like it decorated.

MyBedroom · 10/06/2018 16:04

Danniz right now DS and DD share a room and it's painted bright yellow, and gender neutral wallpaper. My DD is very girly and likes anything sparkle and glittery, bags, princess stuff etc. DS is also a typical boy, nothing I've forced upon them. That's just them.

And of course once DH has moved out, and I'm about to decorate i will ask DD and DS if they want to share a bedroom or not.

Question is now where does my 2yo DS sleep? 😂

And someone else mentioned before about ds2 sleeping in a travel cot, well he sleeps comfortably on a thick mattress the sort of mattress you'd use in a cot, not the thin mattress that comes with the travel cot.

OP posts:
Miladamermalada · 10/06/2018 16:13

My DD sleeps in a travel cot on the thin mattress. She sleeps all night, I put a pillow in there and quilt. Can't see why that can't be long term, babies used to sleep in drawers according to the older generation.

Pixiebutterfly83 · 12/06/2018 10:57

I live in a 2 bedroomed maisonette, I have 3 children - DD 16, DS 13 & DD8. My girls both share one room and my son has the other.

My partner and I have the ikea Hemnes daybed in the living room along with a 4 seater couch and chair. We pull the bed out every night and it converts to a king sized bed.

I am currently studying just now and even with us both (and my 16yo whilst still at school) working we can’t afford anything bigger atm.

Here’s the set up in our living room, (our clothes are in the drawers beneath and a wardrobe in my sons room.

To not have a bedroom
To not have a bedroom
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