To think vegetarian dd is being unreasonable?

[Abergavenny]

A few weeks ago, Dd aged 14 declared that she is now a vegetarian. It’s a bit of a hassle, given that the rest of us (2 parents + 2 siblings) all eat meat, but I’m getting the hang of it i.e. doing quorn chicken for her while doing normal chicken for the rest of us.

Yesterday, however, she refused to eat what I’d made her - I’d done a tomato pasta bake with meatballs, and put veggie meatballs in at one end for her. But she refused to eat it because it had been cooked in the same dish as the meat.

AIBU to think she’s being unreasonably precious given that she ate meat for 13 and a bit years before this?

And is it unreasonable to refuse to cook her anything else, and tell her she either eats veggie options cooked in the same pan as meat or makes her own meal?

I became a vegetarian at 15.i cited ethics, but actually my reasons were to get attention and to make my mums life more complicated.
Your dd could be a much better person than me op, but if not yanbu.

YABVU. DD1 went veggie aged 15 and honestly, it's no hassle to cook in separate pans. And I work full time, and DD2 is wheat intolerant, so I have an extra factor to juggle.

DD2 and I eat vegetarian about 3 times a week, which helps, and the rest of the time we just use separate pans, or we cook something that is basically vegetarian (chilli, curry, stir fry) and then do us some meat in a separate pan. It really isn't that hard.

YABU, it’s not vegetarian! Show your DD some care FGS. You should be proud that she is making her own decisions.

YABU.

Yabvu

Completely out of order to declare that she should eat food cooked in one end of a meat dish.

l'm afraid l wouldn't have eaten that. l once ordered 'Vegetarian Wellington' at a works Christmas do. lt arrived covered in ordinary gravy.....

I have to cook two separate dishes, veggie and meat are never mixed and they are also served away from each other. I tend to do the veggie first and have them removed and then serve the meat versions.

YABVU.

Yabu with that meal.

14 is a bit young to do it alone but start to teach her to cook and ask her to help at meal times.

I went veggie around the same age been 30 years now I wouldn't have eaten that it's not veggie if it's been cooked with real meatballs. Id be pretty upset if someone was trying to pass that off as veggie.Why didn't you do everyone the veggie version?

Btw forget to say in my pp - I'm not vegetarian.

Just to give some perspective in case you think everyone saying YABU has a "veggie" perspective.

As a meat eater (with some veggie/vegan) friends I wouldn't even consider "shared" cooking in the way you describe.

Quite the reverse- I make sure any veggie/vegan food isn't "contaminated" from prep to cook (so separate knives, chopping boards, pans, cooking utensils, bakeware, serving dishes etc).

What can I say? I like my friends and whilst I don't share their food beliefs (though buy welfare meat) I'm not going to shit on them by serving food that's contaminated (and yes that's how they see it) with meat.

The obvious solution here is to get your DD a good veggie cookbook and for her to start cooking for herself and even the family - veggie food is yummy and even as a meat eater I cook veggie food 2/3 times a week.

Yabu. And I had a vegetarian dd so I know how annoying it is. She mostly cooks her own food.

Yabu. It cannot be called 'vegetarian' if it's cooked with meat!
Reminds me of my mil who, when reminded that i was vegetarian, offered me 'just a small portion of chicken, then'.

Yabu. Just get a few small Pyrex dishes for the veggie alternative. Our household is two veggies and three meat eaters and we routinely cook dual meals in this way

Of course YABU. And it's 5 minutes' work to divide the sauce between two dishes, put the relevant meat/vegetarian stuff in and then top both with cheese.

Sounds to me like you are deliberately being goady.

This is probably unpopular, but I wouldn't cater for any special diets for non medical reasons at family mealtimes.

It is difficult enough to find time to cook a balanced meal in the limited time I have available as it is. Anyone who wants anything different can do their own. I'm not running a restaurant.

I would cater for guests, but that's different - it's just a short time and I'm hosting, so I wouldn't expect guests to self cater. I do sometimes serve vegetarian meals for the whole family but I wouldn't want to do so more often than once a week.

If a person is old enough to make the decision to go vegetarian, they are old enough to cook for themselves.

YABU. Why would you cook veggie food within the same pot as meat?

YABVU and should read up a but about it.
You can make veggie casseroles that an also beaten with meat.
But you can't just pick out veggie parts from a meat dish that's just gross!!

Of course YABU. And I am not a vegetarian, I eat meat every day. Have a bit of respect for her views.

YABU.

YABU - it wouldn't be that hard to pop hers in a separate dish

You are being unreasonable. Make the whole thing with quorn or just stick it in a small separate dish

Yabu - you need to use a separate pan to avoid cross contamination. She is not enforcing vegetarianism on you, why do so in reverse?

Yabu. But perhaps it’s time to teach her to cook???