AIBU Furious SIL asked me to leave BBQ because of impetigo

[ohheytheregentleelephant]

I am so embarrassed and angry. Bank holiday weekend bbq is big deal in my family every year - we all make different dishes to take, there's bouncy castle and games and a cocktail bar.

I've got impetigo. I told DM and DF this - it's their bbq - and they didn't seem bothered so I made the dishes I'd been asked to make and turned up for the bbq today.

SIL went mad when she realised I have impetigo and wouldn't let them put the dishes I made out and basically caused a scene in front of my parents and dbro and my dp insisting that I leave. Luckily before all the other guests arrived or that would have been even more embarrassing. She wasn't shouting or anything but she made me feel like a right idiot.

In the end I did leave - with the food I had spent ages making! What a waste. And had to miss out on the day that I'd been looking forward to for ages. It's not even that contagious!

No. Just No! WTF YABVU.

I have antibiotics.

I'm not a teenager I've been here a while, this is a name change for this post as I'm not sure if SIL is on here. Elderly Korean Lady, Penis Beaker yada yada. Sorry, I just got a bit shirty in my responses because I'm still cross about it.

I did check - I checked with my parents who were hosting and they didn't seem to think it was a problem - it's not on my hands. I wasn't preparing food with infected hands - that I would understand!

No one in the family is immuno suppressed.

Yes, what a coincidence!

It's very contagious - good on your SIL, bet it took some courage to insist you leave.
Going to a barbeque with a contagious skin condition? - What a turnip !

calm down, nobody actually ate it if you read my post.

Only because your wise SIL stood up to you and protected everyone else. And then you came on here complaining about her!

NHS website says not contagious once you’ve been on treatment for 48 hrs- if you’ve been taking antibiotics for over 48 hrs according to the NHS website you should be fine

OP - YABU.
If it's reverse - YANBU.

ohheytheregentleelephant but did your parents really know what it was? Maybe they thought it wasn’t contagious because you were asking and assumed if you had a highly contagious disease you would stay home without needing b to ask?

It doesn't matter if your parents were fine with it - other guests obviously weren't and it's not up to your parents or any host to decide if people want to become infected with impetigo which can be very nasty and serious indeed!
You may not have it too badly but that doesn't mean you won't pass it to someone who will have a different reaction to it all - my little boy ended up in hospital for quite some time after catching it from one of the parents at nursery who decided they were fine to come to a parents morning.

I wouldn't have eaten your food.
You should have stayed away.
Anyone with half a brain wouldn't ask if they should attend or not, they would have the nouse to stay away

Had a bridesmaid I was doing makeup for pipe up halfway through doing her face that she had impetigo, I felt like drop kicking her out the window, silly cow, I had to bin all my brushes and the last two ladies were left with me trying to use disposable brushes on their faces. She made sure it was right near the end of doing her makeup. I was fucking furious. Its highly contagious and passed on so easily

I hadn’t heard of it until I read your post.

Regardless if your parents thought it was fine, you should have known better. I would have been furious if I was at a party and someone had that and I caught it. Selfish behaviour OP

Did you storm out or say fair dos and go?

Impetigo is highly contagious. To be honest I wouldn't have thought it ok to turn up to a BBQ with something as contagious as it is. However it does seem like your sil could have been a bit kinder about it all , but if she has kids herself she was probably panicking that they could get infected.

I feel that people who knowingly infect others should pay for their treatments and days off etc. People don't take other peoples health serious at all, maybe it should cost them something before they understand that you can't do this.

I was wondering why people were saying your SIL handled it badly, from what you've written she was pretty pissed off, but handled it well. She didn't shout, just insisted that you and your food couldn't be there.

You might be cross, and embarrassed op, but honestly, she was right.

Did your doctor not run over the dos and donts with you?

You have something highly contagious.
Regardless of what your parents say you were in the wrong. You went on purpose near others that could catch it.

@MiddleClassProblem great comment

Perhaps you aren’t infectious anymore. That will depend on whether it is recurrent and how long you’ve been taking the antibiotics for. However, you were very thoughtless to make food when the nhs guidelines tell you not to.

If you were already on the antibiotics to the point of not being contagious you would have mentioned it in your OP.

Ewww. Good effort SIL. Why on earth would you have thought it was ok to go?!

You shouldn’t have have been at the BBQ. It’s not your DM and DFs place to decide for everyone there that it’s ok for them to be exposed to a highly infectious disease.
You probably feel embarrassed at being kicked out but really what were you thinking of putting everyone in that position?

For goodness sake. I'm not immuno supressed but I don't want fucking impetigo. You are a very selfish person and VERY unreasonable.

YABU for the reasons other people have stated.

I had impetigo about ten years ago. My GP gave me medication for it (can't remember if it was antibiotics or a cream) but it wouldn't get better. Turned out I was reinfecting myself because I was using a powder brush to put face powder on and of the course the infection was on the brush. So if you wear make up, get rid of your brushes and don't wear any makeup until it's cleared.