To not want MiL to drink while babysitting

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My MiL looks after DD(2.5) once a week while I’m at work. She will send pictures to show what they’re up to, and I noticed in the most recent an empty bottle of wine and two glasses on the table. She was meeting her friend for lunch and they had a bottle between them, whilst she’s looking after her granddaughter.

One glass might be ok, I suppose, but half a bottle seems like a lot. When I mentioned it to DP, he said that it was ok because she drinks a lot normally so half a bottle isn’t a lot for her!

AIBU to be really cross that she’s had that much whilst in charge of my little one?

She can't afford to give her mother in law the choice. She needs her to look after her child. She can't afford for her mother in law to tell her to fuck off. Which quite frankly if I was the mother in law I would. However I'm not known for my tolerance of the hypocrites amongst us.

She can't afford to give her mother in law the choice. She needs her to look after her child

Exactly.
She needs to decide what's most important. One things for sure, she can't tell her mil she can't have a glass of wine so she really should find someone else to do the childminding.

I'm much more charming than you were being momo. Having a go at someone who doesn't have the money to have the choices you do is advanced level dick behaviour. And I notice you've widened the scope of what you were suggesting too. If MIL fell under a bus tomorrow, OP and DP could potentially call on compassionate leave. The sort of arrangement employers often have for such emergencies but that can't be extended to cover long term lack of childcare. It is idiotic to conflate the two.

Poor OP admitted ages ago she was BU and seems to have gracefully departed. Meanwhile a squad of bullshitters and fuckwits continue to take the worst excesses of her argument and compound it, with a dollop of ivory tower thinking thrown in too. Blech.

You are entitled and U.

Paid childcare I would expect them not to be drinking. Free childcare their choice

she would probably choose the wine I would

I don’t think anyone here has criticised non drinkers? My dm is one. Never drank or smoke and always kept healthy Poor love is late 80s now with altzimers.

The hilarious statements on here were about a the mils reward was childminding her own grandchild full time (as she had a very boring life and begged to have a toddler full time.) and
that was the reward parallel universe.

And the other that any one who drank a drop of alcohol would never be allowed around her child.

Sorry but those are both bat shit and hilarious.

And is it me or are the militant non drinkers appear very very serious and joyless.

Anyway cheers everyone I have no grandchildren today and no driving do myself and dd are having a lovely cold glass in the garden.

And if my dog or cat or rabbit needs rushing to the vet I will ring a taxi

Can you do a diagram of the wine bottle and two glasses please? In colour to denote red/white and feel free to add lipstick stains/wine drippage.

'And is it me or are the militant non drinkers appear very very serious and joyless.'

No

It's not just you

Can you do a diagram of the wine bottle and two glasses please?

Would this be a ....Vin diagram??

Excellent punnage @MarthasGinYard

Why thank you

A lunchtime livener has helped

Cheers

Day drinking whilst looking after dgd=not on

This

I'm not a militant non-drinker and I'm a grandmother who normally defends child-minding grandmothers, but it think it is dangerous to be drinking while caring for a small child.

Ah, now I'm batshit, serious and joyless because I'm a non drinker due to meds/disabilities and because I make a parenting decision DH and I are happy with.

OK then

Parents drink in charge of children all the time, so long as you are sober enough to be in charge if there is an emergency

My experience of small children is that you have to be on the ball to avoid an emergency, not just to take them to the hospital after it happened.

Life on MN would be much easier if people didn't leave their LO in the care of their GP. I don't plan on doing it at all because I know my MIL drinks, so I use a childminder. This upsets MIL, but what can you do.

'Ah, now I'm batshit, serious and joyless because I'm a non drinker due to meds/disabilities and because I make a parenting decision DH and I are happy with.

OK then '

No not because of any of that.

Because of your silly silly comment

My comment was about our parenting decision

Another who would vote SGB for prime minister

Me and DH are howling at the protestations that Swedish people don't drink much alcohol. We have lived in many countries, have alot of Swedish friends and have never known any nationality that drinks more than them. Put any British binge drinker to shame
I'm really interested to know what a small amount of alcohol would be to someone that thinks 2 small glasses is a huge amount. A thimble full perhaps

Martha - your name says it all

My experience of small children is that you have to be on the ball to avoid an emergency, not just to take them to the hospital after it happened.

My experience of small children is that you have to drink at least 3 glasses of wine to numb yourself to the pain of Peppa Pig/Paw Patrol/Ninjago/[Insert current child obsessions here]. It's also my experience that wine also makes imaginary play far more fun...

When I am old I shall enjoy day drinking and sleeping all afternoon. I won't be looking after any possible grandkids.

'Martha - your name says it all '

I know

What a lush I must be

If I was drinking with my grandchildren I would pick Covent Garden above Wire Piddle any day

Definitely if you were sitting outside. The garden of the pub at Wyre Piddle has stepped terraces going down to the river Severn, positively hazardous for the accident-prone, especially when drink has been taken.

I always read these threads with a mixture of and and not so much the OP as she’s left the thread now but the responses which suggest things along the lines of how looking after the grandchild is payment or if anyone drank a drop around their child they would never look after them again, and then I think that these people must surely only write these responses to get a rise out of people, because no-one is really that batshit, are they? Not in the real world?

And FWIW I am entirely teetotal and I fail to see how anyone can get that worked up over a couple of glasses of wine. And I think that in sixteen years time they’ll be the ones picking up their little darlings from a&e when they’ve had to be admitted due to never having been around alcohol.