To think he should pay on first date???

[namechangerforthis123]

Had a 'frank' discussion with a girlfriend at the w/e who was outraged that I thought a first date should pay for dinner.

I am v independent, decent career, probably generally feminist views on the whole.
He made it v clear he liked me.

But it was such a turn off when he started calculating how much it was each! 

It just was a passion killer; can't explain why!!

Would be interested to hear the MN view on this. Get your flame throwers ready! 

I hear what you're saying Gin, but him paying for everything while you're in maternity should be a given, not a bonus!

Why should it be a given? And why are you dictating to others when you've banged on so much about indiviual choices

Well a woman doesn't have much choice in the early months after a baby does she? Bf on demand 24/7 etc.

What's that got to do with paying? If she's on maternity pay they can still share expenses if that's what they choose and in fact for many couples wouldn't be a choice, would be a necessity.

Also, who dictates that she will be bf on demand?

Do you think men shouldn't be impacted by childbirth at all?

What a preposterous comment. How on earth have you gathered that from my posts?

I also disagree that women that use "men pay for the first date" as a meal ticket are rare

Me too. Sadly, there are quite a few that choose a man based on the size of his wallet and how much he will cover of their expenses so they have to do little or no work.

Those that would walk away from a man not covering the first date would indicate that they are indeed not rare.

Ruffian - sorry I think you are cross wires with me. Yes of course there would be shared finances after a baby where possible, but if the maternity pay is very minimal, non- existent or it runs out then of course the DH should be prepared to financially support his own family.

I was going to RTFT, and may do later as I think it might be rather interesting. For now, though, I would say that a man should pay on a first date, and all subsequent dates. I wouldn't look once, never mind twice, at one who didn't. I would also expect him to walk on the road side of the pavement (as my 18 yo DS also does). So There.

@WhatAmessTheBad. Oh i love sarcasm

@siwel123 I am sure you do. But you need to look elsewhere if that's how you get your kicks...

@WhatAmessTheBad i thought your post was sarcastic.
Seems as you think men must pay for all your dates.

So fucking glad im childfree by choice.

@HelenaDove. Some nights I wish I was

@Siwel123 I think you mean "given that", rather than "seems as". But no, I was not being sarcastic. Agree that it might be nice to be childfree by choice sometimes, though.

I do mean given that .
Yes childfree would be beautiful right now

namechangerforthis123

For the record, he did not whip out his calculator, he could divide by two (hooray!)

Not sure why the op is allowing people to think he did break out a calculator. Also, people need to read at the very least, the ops posts because she already said he simply divided in two, which seems reasonable to me.

@Siwel123 I like you very much for taking my pedantry on the chin.

@WhatAMessTheBad. It's all good, maybe we could go for a meal, but split the bill in half of course

@siwel123

UPDATE!!

Out over the weekend & a 27 year old (oh my giddy aunt!!) decided he liked me & would not let me buy a drink. Would never dream of dating a 10-years-my-junior man normally....but...!!!

Got me really analysing why I was attracted to him...needless(?) to say(!), it was more than the buying of drinks! His whole demeanour was so self-assured, so confident, so attractive!!!

10 years younger....?!?!?

Ooh la la. You cougar?

There are some terribly complicated women out there who like men to behave in a manly sort of way, but at the same time we don't want to be beaten or taken as chattel. I don't know how to explain it any better than this.

I think there might be some terribly complicated men out there who want women to behave in a womanly sort of way, but don't want to be seen as an ATM.

THIS thread...................the post under the picture of the mug.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3253805-To-expect-him-to-stay-at-home-if-I-can-t-walk

Equality my arse!!!!!!!!!

I think one of you should have paid. Splitting the bill on a date is a bit weird. Generally whoever did the invite should pay. If there’s a next time, then the other should pay.