Granny gave him first toy without me

[CheesendPickles]

We are staying with my parents at the moment because my husband has been in hospital. I bought my son a toy at the weekend. He's 8 months old so it's his first real toy. I was really excited to give it to him but it needed a random type of battery that I didn't have.
Went to shops today and picked up the batteries then popped back out to the pharmacy to pick up my husbands prescription. I came back to find baby playing with the toy. I'm a bit devastated to be honest....
A few weeks ago she gave him a taste of banana when I was out.... his first taste of real food!
AIBU to feel a bit annoyed?

YANBU. The food thing is really off as he could have allergies she doesn't know about. I once gave DS a new toy seconds before dh came into the room. He was a bit upset. I felt crap so I understand how you feel but you'll be told how pathetic you are being. Tell her how you feel. The toy was one we'd spent ages looking for as it was one of only a handful I'd had as a kid so was more loaded with emotion.

Hello! It's you, isn't it? Honeymoon in Maui!

YABU it's a toy.

You are over reacting massively op. Just dont give him it for an hour and when you give it back it will likely be the same reaction as the first time.

Weaned at 6 months?  current advice is that 6 months is when you start weaning

Ffs most people use weaned to mean 'weaned onto food'

Oh for god's sake. I can't believe the huge deal that is made of everything surrounding a baby on here. Whether it's who's turn it is to do the night feed, first taste of banana or 'I've been looking after the baby all day so can't possibly be expected to clean or cook'.

Sorry everyone I should have said months ago in relation to the banana! Time flys I suppose with a baby... feels like yesterday

That makes more sense!

Oh wind your fucking neck in justmuddling, i’m expressing an opinion, as is literally everyone else. If it makes you feel uncomfortable, imagine how you’d feel if you were dealing with staying with a difficult relative while your partner was ill while also looking after a small baby, multiply it by 100, and enjoy the brand new sensation humans call ‘empathy’

I would have been quite upset too, mind you I had PND and was slightly anxious unhinged

Honestly, in a few weeks time you'll be sick of the sight of the thing. You've got plenty of other firsts to come.

Oh good grief OP. Haven’t you got anything better to worry about? What a nice life you must have if this is a problem. Also, toys and different colours, sounds shapes etc are very good for child development. It’s strange you hadn’t given any before 8 months.

You're opinion is not the gospel. Other opinions that are different to yours are no less valid and the posters expressing their opinions don't need snippy, name calling posts from you. OK?

You're overreacting about the toy but I'd be really pissed off that someone gave my baby food without checking with me.

Like i said, if snippiness bothers you that much, imagine how the op feels. Do you think she ‘needs’ them? Or are you one of those arseholes who prides themselves on ‘telling it like it is’ then gets the wild hump if anyone does it back to them?

I can understand the over reaction and empathise with OP's difficult circumstances. It still is an over reaction though.

As a pp pointed out, you just can't stage manage every First Time your baby experiences something new and catch it all on camera. That in itself is setting yourself up for a catalogue of disappointments and fallings out with anyone looking after your child.

It's too controlling. In fact almost repeating the controlling behaviour her mother is accused of.

bloody hell she has probably been desperate to give the poor child a toy to play with for about 8 months! yabvu and wayyyyyyyyy over precious. he'll eat a lot of banana you'll be sick of cleaning it up soon.

You are not over reacting at all. I'd have been disappointed if I'd bought my dc something I knew they were going to absolutely love and then were not able to see their face when they were given it.

And everyone saying about having heaps of toys by 8 months. Mine didn't have what I'd call a proper expensive toy until about that age either. It was all staking rings, teddies, ball etc which were all fine and played with. So you are also not unreasonable to have not had a house load of toys already.

People need to lay off the op, did none of you read that her dh is ill in hospital? Or did you decide to ignore that so that you could jump on the bandwagon and join in the kicking on someone while they’re obviously down?!?

Op, I would be extremely upset about the banana and definitely don’t think yabu.

And I understand about the disappointment about the toy too. Had you told your mum that you specifically wanted to be there when he used it for the first time? If so then yanbu, but if not, then maybe because she didn’t know she didn’t think it would be a big deal.

I really hope things start improving with your dh and that he is home very soon xxx

@Petitepamplemousse

Oh good grief OP. Haven’t you got anything better to worry about? What a nice life you must have if this is a problem.

Yes, she's having a lovely life. Husband ill in hospital and having to stay in someone else's house with a small baby. Lovely. Not at all stressful.

@MerryDeath actually she's been the one telling me he doesn't need toys yet, that he would know how to play with them anyway 🙄
I actually appreciate and understand that i was probably being a bit dramatic about the toy. I was disappointed and that's why I posted to get impartial advice. I didn't want to overreact off the cuff and I haven't thanks to this post. So thank you all for the reply's, I've calmed down and am actually over it.

I don't think you or the other posters have understood the banana incident. That was his first taste of food... not his first taste of banana. Contrary to the comments I don't feel the need to witness his first taste of every food type. She also fed him his first taste of ice cream.... I was ok with that. Pardon me for wanting to witness the first taste of me my son eats!

It is very difficult with the grandparents ,my husband mom offer to give honey to 3month old baby,sleeps noisy, then in hot day ask to give water to 3m old baby,now i have panic,i cant leave baby with them alone.they staying with us 2 months,and i think i start getting PND from them,i getting irritated every day.

I think the stressful situation is what's causing the OP to question if her behaviour is unreasonable.

*wouldn't

To be honest, OP, your mum isn't being nasty. By the time your kids reach adulthood you can't remember many of the "firsts". I can remember the first day at nursery, primary and secondary schools, the first proper smile and first tooth, that's about it. I know it feels really important now but it's tiny in the great scheme of things.

@kaytee87 one of mine was not weaned (by weaned I mean just starting to be interested in food) until about 8 months. He just wasn’t interested. “He should have been weaned at 6 months”, says who exactly? World Health Organization says it’s okay to introduce complimentary foods at 6-9 months. Some babies aren’t ready and shoving it down their necks won’t help.

Anyway, OP, you’re being dramatic. It sounds like he had toys before that, just not battery operated ones... and honestly they’re the worst types anyway!