Granny gave him first toy without me

[CheesendPickles]

We are staying with my parents at the moment because my husband has been in hospital. I bought my son a toy at the weekend. He's 8 months old so it's his first real toy. I was really excited to give it to him but it needed a random type of battery that I didn't have.
Went to shops today and picked up the batteries then popped back out to the pharmacy to pick up my husbands prescription. I came back to find baby playing with the toy. I'm a bit devastated to be honest....
A few weeks ago she gave him a taste of banana when I was out.... his first taste of real food!
AIBU to feel a bit annoyed?

When you give him his toy tomorrow morning, his face will still light up like he's never seen it before, I mean he's only a baby. You can still video him playing.

To me, a "First" is when they say their first word, start to walk, first Christmas, start school, get a job, their first car etc.
A new toy is an insignificant milestone.

It's far more important that your baby has a good relationship with their granny and are happy in their care.

I expect tensions are high with you staying at your parents and your husband in hospital. Your parents sound like they have actually been a great help during a difficult time.

He's obviously had teddies and chew toys and basic stuff.

Is he a Labrador?

[gin[gin

Oh dear. Never mind, there are still lots of first you can do, first chocolate ice, first grapefruit, first fried chicken, first skateboard, first pogo stick,

Unless you specifically gave granny a list of permitted and forbidden foods your banana gate outrage is petty. Banana is one of the first foods most babies get to taste, By 8 months I imagine granny assumed he had already tasted it.

YANBU

It's true that in a few years you won't remember (or care) about his first toy, but at the time it is important. Sadly you will remember the incident.

It's very cruel to ignore the feelings of her mum for things like that. Don't worry, you will have plenty of happy moments. I agree, very soon they all blur, and you really can't remember about first anything.

You didn't give him his first banana? Doesn't matter, give him his first chocolate button, he will love you even more.

A toy is a toy though, I can't understand why this one was a first. Never forget you are your baby's favourite person in the world, that is what matters. Trying to bribe him will never change that.

Ah that is a bit crap.

Maybe wrap it up in some paper and film him tomorrow unwrapping it, I am sure his face will light up just by doing that.

🌷 I’m sorry to hear about your DH, I hope he makes a good recovery.

As she knew you wanted to give it to him & see his reaction she was being really unreasonable. Nasty & selfish actually.

Try not to upset yourself over it too much. When you give it to him tomorrow it’ll be like the first time all over again - babies are a bit like goldfish with new toys. Video it for DH, he won’t know it wasn’t the first time & there’s no point upsetting him.

If your Mum keeps doing stuff she knows will upset you, you really need to deal with it head on, but not at the moment while DH is so ill. Just try to focus on DH getting better and DS being looked after by people who love him.

Missing out of the ‘firsts’ can really hurt at the time, but in time you’ll realise that it’s actually not that important to see/do these things first. Kids are a constant stream of ‘firsts’ and achievements.

I'd go NC

Honestly, OP, it;'s just as entertaining the second and subsequent times your child plays with a new toy or achieves some other milestone. I think you need to go with the flow a bit more and stop trying to stage manage everything. Children are enormously entertaining as well as frustrating and worrying and all the rest of it. You have plenty of fun times ahead!

So not his first toy then. Liar

Oh come on you grumpy lot. Op’s dh is seriously ill give her a fucking break. She hasn’t been leaving him with the granny to go get her nails did, she is probably visiting her dh. What with him being seriously ill.

Op i understand, and you probably are feeling a bit more sensitive than normal. Ignore the hatchet faces on here, the second anyone mentions a relative looking after their dc for them, some people get so green with envy they lose sight of every ither detail of the post. Add to that the heady thrill of giving someone a kicking over being ‘pfb’ (because only sad losers think their babies are precious haha get over yourself etc) and that’s why you’ve got such a bunch of cunty replies.

No it’s not the end of the world and you’ll enjoy other things with him but i completely understand. Aibu’s probably not the best place for this. Hindsight eh

Wait till his first trip to McDonalds.

I presumed her DH had been discharged if she was picking up his prescription.

He should have been weaned at 6 months.

Weaned at 6 months? current advice is that 6 months is when you start weaning.

But I think you are being a bit precious, OP. You could invent all sorts of firsts, but it doesn't seem like something worth getting aeriated about.

I'm with Ikeepafork on the chocolate button. I can't stand bananas!

@snowsun

At 8 months old he needs more than teddies , rattles etc. He needs cause and effect toys from about five months old. Toys you bang and they light up and make noises. Activity tables. A toy you put balls in and they fall down.

FGS, how did the human race ever develop before there were batteries? At 8 months old my children didn't have any toys like that, and have grown up perfectly well-adjusted and able to problem solve.

Having said that, I'm not surprised the OP is pissed off, if I'd gone to the trouble of buying an exciting toy for my baby, one that 'did something' I'd want to be there when it was used for the first time as well.

What'll you do if your child take his first steps when you're not in the room?

Yeah if he’s been discharged she should just snap back to normal by now immediately eh, he’s probably totally cured and the situation is no longer remotely stressful, esp if he’s the main earner and she’s on mat leave

And now with the picking holes over what she means by weaned Ffs

Therr aren’t enough faces in the world for pile ons like this

—Meanwhile 5000 threads about made up ‘cheeky fuckers’ skip merrily on with people lapping up every implausible word, only on mumsnet eh—

Hear hear Vanhalen

its not like hes even going to remember ..........

Or is it here here? I never know. Anyway, well said.

Congratulations on your promotion to website moderator, OfficerVanHalen.

Like everyone else has said, she obviously thought he'd eaten food and had toys before. He's eight months old.

@AnnieAnoniMouser

You are making this into a huge issue with absolutely no evidence. It doesn't seem as though the OP had told her MIL that this was a big deal and she wanted to ge the one to give the toy and film it. She didn't say anything about it.

Maybe the baby was whinging and she thought it'd cheer him up.

You are unbelievable with your accusations of nastiness and spite. I bet you are a nightmare IRL, seeing slights and taking offence when there really is no need.