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AIBU?

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Original poster

Feeding workmen etiquette??

225 replies

Snowcatrunsthehouse · 09/05/2018 14:22

Please help me I appear to have failed.
We are currently having some work done on our house that will take approximately 6 weeks. It’s one man doing the job and I have regularly supplied tea, coffee and icey drinks.
But today he is dropping hints about people who make him bacon sandwiches in the morning and cook him stews etc???

I did a night shift last night I only got up to collect my toddler from pre school and haven’t even eaten myself since yesterday evening. I would never even normally have bacon in the house let alone cook anything big at lunch. I was asking if he wanted a drink when he started telling me he had been to the old lady up the road for lunch. Blush
I feel bad and really don’t know what is expected of me.
For context I work part time in a very demanding job whilst juggling 3 children I am rarely at home for long as taking toddler to classes etc doing school runs or I’m working or asleep post work. I’m also an introvert who hates having people in the house so I accept I may have failed here on etiquette. I was more than happy suppling good coffee when I’m here,
So please wise people what am I meant to be offering the man doing the roof??? Btw I’m not a good cook! Is getting the kids to make him cakes acceptable? Confused

OP posts:
PeapodBurgundy · 09/05/2018 17:14

I rarely make drinks for tradesmen Blush I put out a glass and mug each by the kettle, and leave out squash and the biscuit/cake tin and make it clear to help themselves as they want, then promptly get out of the house unless they need me to stay for whatever reason. I did bring a fish supper home for a tradesman once, but he'd done a couple of favours while he was there which I was grateful for.

HundredsAndThousandsOfThem · 09/05/2018 17:15

The person who takes the time off must either have a huge amount of holiday leave or nothing better to fill it with. I would never waste holiday sitting around my house doing nothing.

SunnyNights · 09/05/2018 17:18

We had a kitchen extension last year, big job and took four months. I have fairly relaxed employers but even they would balk at me needing 16 weeks off?! I don't believe people take time off for work like that, just not feasible.

SunnyNights · 09/05/2018 17:19

And, I provided tea, coffee and biscuits. No meals, he's being a CF!

ChiefSuspect · 09/05/2018 17:22

Avasarala I know you mentioned that you were relatively new to MN, so I say this genuinely:

  1. You are going on a massive me-rail. Honestly, you made your point that you think it is stingy & bizarre. Fine. But you have continued to derail with completely irrelevant details of your own individual set up. Know one cares, but it is just annoying to read (IMHO).
  1. It is deign, not dain.
  1. Please, you are like a dog with a bloody bone. See point 1.
mrsjackrussell · 09/05/2018 17:31

No my husbands a tradesman and he doesn't expect food at all. On a hot day he would expect to be offered water but a cup of tea is a bonus. Your man is being cheeky

Bornlazy · 09/05/2018 17:34

I hate having workmen in my house I can't relax and it makes me feel terribly uncomfortable. If I was making myself a sandwich I would feel obliged to offer them one because that's the way I have been brought up. I would be hoping they would say no but would feel the need to ask anyway. My mother would be the one offering bacon rolls and stew as she would see that as totally normal. That said if someone was dropping big hints like that it would make me not want to give them anything...

expatinscotland · 09/05/2018 17:37

Yeah, stews and sarnies. If you're feeling up to it, offer him a hummus wrap for lunch and sushi for dinner.

ChiefSuspect · 09/05/2018 17:38

No-one, not know one BlushGrin

And while I'm at it:

  1. You keep saying things like MN thinks this, the people on MN are so like this etc. The people on MN are not one homogenous hive mind. It's pretty sweeping to make statements about people on MN as a whole.
Tartsamazeballs · 09/05/2018 17:40

I start them off with a tea or coffee, cheapie variety pack of biscuits left on the side. Tell them where the kettle is and to have at it.

The last builders I had were all on special diets- diabetic or low fat or vegetarian. No way was I catering for all that 😂

TroysMammy · 09/05/2018 17:45

When I've used workmen they bring their own lunch and down tools for half an hour. They only get drinks as I don't buy biscuits and don't think to buy especially for them.

dobbythedoggy · 09/05/2018 17:55

Happy to offer people doing work here drinks and biscuits if I or they are able to access the kitchen. Ice lollies and chocices in the hotter weather when the children have them. Our place is rental and old so has lots of work done on it a couple of times a year, usually by the same few contractors who are all lovely blokes. On a Wednesday they'd also get cake.

We do feed the builder and his crew, something from the slow cooker, on occation when they work later over supper time when we'd be eatting anyway. He always brings the children back something from the bakery when he goes and has repayed the favour when they ordered takeaway!

Many of the contractors are local to us and relish being able to go home for a tea break or lunch. I grew up fairly rurally where there weren't really any opptions other than bring your own sandwiches and people tended to work very long days to cut downob extra hours of driving. So it wasn't at all unusual for builders working long days to negotiate a hot meal if possiable as part of their pay. My dad used to do bacon rolls in the morning and a large one pot of something for them before and after he finished work. It could cut a couple of days off big projects and accepted as the norm locally and I believe still is.

RoseWhiteTips · 09/05/2018 17:55

Yes, it’s deign I was dying to say that but thought it might be rude...

RoseWhiteTips · 09/05/2018 17:57

Making him stewis well funny. I laughed out loud at Bluntness’ response.
🤣🤣🤣

RoseWhiteTips · 09/05/2018 17:58

...stew is...

RoseWhiteTips · 09/05/2018 17:58

👨‍🍳

RoseWhiteTips · 09/05/2018 17:58

Eh?
I meant this stew-maker.👨‍🍳

RoseWhiteTips · 09/05/2018 17:59

Crossed emoticon weirdness.

RoseWhiteTips · 09/05/2018 17:59

Oh!

RoseWhiteTips · 09/05/2018 18:02

How totally irrelevant are some of the posts. Still, it’s entertaining. Lol

LastOneDancing · 09/05/2018 18:02

Have you been drinking RoseWhiteTips?

Grin
RoseWhiteTips · 09/05/2018 18:05

Nooo!!! Still busy laughing though.

YetAnotherUser · 09/05/2018 18:08

If I have tradespeople in, I always keep them well lubricated with as many drinks as they could possibly want. I've been known to supply a bacon sarnie on the odd occasion if I've been making one myself and if it's a long, all day job.

Smeddum · 09/05/2018 18:08

Ok so I’ve come in in the midst of a fairly odd derail but here goes anyway.

DP is a spark, he’s always really chuffed if someone makes him a coffee but he doesn’t expect it. He certainly wouldn’t expect to be fed!

I offer anyone working in the house a drink and maybe a biscuit if I’ve got any, but other than that I wouldn’t offer food.

clyde5591 · 09/05/2018 18:19

He's a chancer - do not provide any more food - tea, coffee etc. are plenty.
Have you a written quote for the works to be carried out? Most important
I would keep on top of this guy and the work he is doing.
Check him out as if he is cheeky about food he is such going to be more so about work.
This comes from the heart - long, expensive and unless guy cost us over £25,000

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