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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to take this back to court?

608 replies

Justonedayatatime11 · 09/05/2018 08:24

Exh took me to court a few years back and obtained a CAO for our dd(4). CAO states EOW and 50% of his annual leave. Exh has rarely adhered to the CAO and can get very aggressive if I can’t change plans to accommodate him wanting to swap and change weekends. I’ve received a message from him last night saying that every weekend for the next 4 months is going to have to change, but he doesn’t know how or when.
FWIW, he’s blaming work. Now he could take the CAO to his commanding officer and have it enforced which would mean he would reliably see dd EOW. However, he’s admitted he won’t do this as ‘it will harm his chances of promotion’.
My plans for the summer are now up in the air because I now don’t know when/if he’ll be seeing dd. Not only will that potentially leave me out of pocket, but more importantly dd is getting no consistency. He’ll go for a month without seeing her and then want her for a week at a time.
To be clear, I am not trying to stop contact. Dd adores him and I wouldn’t want to take that away from her. AIBU to take this back to court and look at getting the CAO changed? I just want some consistency for her sake and some reliability for me?

OP posts:
RandomMess · 29/08/2018 21:43

So glad it's sorted Thanks

AngeloMysterioso · 29/08/2018 21:45

YES OP!! So thrilled for you Flowers

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 29/08/2018 21:46

Your solicitor sounds great. Glad today went well Flowers

NotTheWayISeeIt · 29/08/2018 21:48

I’m so pleased to hear things went well. Hopefully now that everything is officially sorted things will settle down between you and your ex. Good luck for the future.

CrabbityRabbit · 29/08/2018 21:54

Amazing update. You have been so SO strong to stick to your guns.

Brew and Cake for you.

Flowers for kickarse lawyer!

ChanandlerBongsNeighbour · 29/08/2018 21:55

Excellent news op x

samsonthecat · 29/08/2018 21:56

Well done, i’ve been thinking about you all day Flowers

BarbaraHepworth · 29/08/2018 22:00

So pleased for you Thanks

EeeSheWasThin · 29/08/2018 22:02

Well done just, sounds like a very difficult day but good on you for seeing it through. And way to go, new solicitor!

QueenDaisy · 29/08/2018 22:03

I’ve lurked on your thread, i’m unlurking to say well done & I hope this is the turning point of a happier life for you & your DD Flowers

Worlds0kayestmum · 29/08/2018 22:04

So pleased for you, I had a lump in my throat reading all your posts. Try to take some time out for yourself now x

Maelstrop · 29/08/2018 22:05

Omg, you absolutely rock, as does your solicitor! Well done!

nononsene · 29/08/2018 22:05
Flowers
ChampagneCommunist · 29/08/2018 22:09

Go you! I've been thinking of you all day!

Fruitbatdancer · 29/08/2018 22:09

Well done. That’s great to hear. Give yourself a well deserved hug and 🍷! Hopefully he’ll now be a bit less of an arse!

FinallyHere · 29/08/2018 22:12

Great job, congratulations @Justonedayatatime11 and solicitor

swampytiggaa · 29/08/2018 22:13

So pleased to read your update 💕 stay strong 💕

ItsJustASimpleLine · 29/08/2018 22:16

Well done to you and your solicitor. 5hrs is quite the ordeal but sounds like it was worth it.

TheMonkeyMummy · 29/08/2018 22:25

I am so pleased for you. You fought and won today.

I am sure this isn't the end, but this is a MAJOR win. Well done. WineFlowersCake

Nacreous · 29/08/2018 22:31

Woo! Go you, and go your lawyer!

I would feel very drained I think. Sort of like my insides have shrunk so they don’t really fit my body. I hope you can get some rest now.
🍰☕️♥️

HalloumiGus · 29/08/2018 22:33

Well done OP Flowers

zoobud · 29/08/2018 22:43

Unlurking to say I'm so pleased it went well for you today Wine

planetclom · 29/08/2018 22:44

Well done

Mixedupmummy · 29/08/2018 22:53

another well done for being so stong. you are 100% in the right. he is a lying a manipulative twat and is trying to control you as you are trying to move on with your life. and I say that as a solicitor.
I would find it hard to believe that anyone could act this way had I not lived through it with my own dad doing the same sort of thing to my mum. your dd will thank you one day Flowers

Wheresthel1ght · 29/08/2018 22:53

I may be slightly emotional today after dp crashed my car with me and dd in it yesterday but your update has had me in tears.

I am pleased for you just that is amazing news! Very proud of you and your solicitor for being fricking awesome!!

As someone has just posted, don't expect him to take this laying down. He will be an even bigger cunt than normal because he didn't win. Dig in and remember whatever he says or does you stood up to a bully and you kicked his scumbag ass! You rock!