To think DD wasn’t unreasonable not to give up reserved seat?

[jasminajasminda]

Dd17 was getting the train from London to Edinburgh yesterday to visit her sister at uni (she’s just finished her internal school year 12 exams, and lessons don’t start again until Wednesday).

We obviously reserved her a seat. She arrived, got on the train, and sat down in her seat. The train was very busy, and a few minutes after the train started moving, a middle aged woman with a walking stick, having apparently wandered through several carriages (dd was in the front carriage) without finding a seat, looked around dd’s Carriage, then came up to her and asked her to move as she needed a seat (pointedly making a big deal of her walking stick). When dd pointed out that she had reserved that seat, and there was no way she was giving up her seat on a four hour train journey, the woman told her that she was young, and therefore didn’t need a seat as much as she did.

At this dd put on her headphones, and listened to music and ignored her. The woman eventually huffed and left the carriage. Dd said that she noticed a few other passengers giving her (dd) dirty looks throughout the journey.

Was dd being unreasonable?

Absolutely no way was your DD BU!! Anyone else could have given up their seat if they felt that strongly. Who doesn’t reserve a seat for that length of journey?

Your DD is definitely not being unreasonable. The woman is a CF. If a seat was that important she should have reserved a seat prior to her journey.

As for the other passengers giving her dirty looks as other posters have said, if they were that concerned they could have volunteered their seat.

For those holier than thou posters who said they would give up their seat I doubt you would stand for 4 hours on a train.

The woman should have reserved a seat, or failing that gone to one of the carriages with unreserved seats which probably have designated seats which should be given up for those unable to stand.

Honestly? I would ashamed of her. I would be first out of my seat for a person who needed a stick to stand or walk.

Ashamed? for FS. If it was that important the woman should have reserved her seat.

Woman should have reserved her seat. Agree she picked on your daughter as a young female is seen as a soft target.

The lady should have booked herself a seat if she needed one. She obviously asked your daughter to move because she is a teenaged girl.

I will always move out of a seat on the bus for someone elderly or disabled but I would not move out of a reserved train seat on a 4 hour journey.

Reserved seat or not, I would have moved myself and then found the guard and explained the problem. We don't know why the disabled lady had not booked a seat, she could have been travelling last minute and not been able to. Either way, leaving a disabled person to stand is unacceptable. Surely your daughter has been taught that?

Ivgotasecretcanyoukeepit

Makes very little difference in the moment, though, does it? I would not let an elderly woman stand when I was able to do so more easily. If my DD did, I wouldn't be thrilled.

@Pengggwn The woman that the OP mentioned was middle-aged not elderly.

The woman should have reserved a seat.

You snooze, you lose!

There are always unreserved carriages, the woman should have arrived earlier and got one of those.

Your DD stood up for herself, and was right to do so. I have no time for someone who expects to be treated preferentially as they are disabled. Everyone has the option to book a seat. She chose not to.

I would always give up my seat on a bus. I wouldn't on a four hour train journey and it's not fair to ask someone else to do so.

I thought you had to sit in your reserved seat or it invalidates your ticket?

Elderly compared to me, then. I just wouldn't do it and that's that for me.

Seems like it was just a ‘I’m old you’re young move’ situation which is why she didn’t ask any other adult to move.

Of course it wasn’t “just” about age.

It was clearly about disability.

People don’t carry walking sticks around when they don’t need them.

More train staff would certainly help in these situations.

I am sorry but if i paid for a seat on a long train and 4 hours standing is not fun no matter your age i would not be giving up my seat as no one be giving me a seat if i gave her a seat so i would be out of pocket and sore after standing for 4 hours.

Buses or short journies yes i would give my seat but not long ones as like fuck am I standing for 4 hours or sitting on the floor no matter my age. If she wanted / needed a seat she should of booked one.

Your daughter seems to have been targeted because of her age.

This.

Your daughter was not BU. If the other woman had needed a seat that much she should have reserved her own.

You do know that some of those of us with disabilities are quite capable of being CF's, displaying entitled behaviour, being devious and 'milking it', right? Because we're just people, like everyone else.

See the person, not the disability.

Being devils advocate, maybe the woman didn’t have enough notice to reserve a seat. You can’t reserve seats on the day of travel and it could have been a last minute journey.

It’s not your daughter’s fault the train was full. The lady should’ve spoken to the staff about needing assistance rather than walk up and down the carriages and pick on your DD.

In a short journey I would’ve given up my seat, but in a 4 hour plus journey you’ve paid a lot of money for I wouldn’t have moved.

The woman should've found the guard not picked a random passenger to intimidate