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Original poster

Daddy and daughter date nights?

189 replies

ILikeMyChickenFried · 01/05/2018 12:22

How long has this been a thing? An advert for a local Daddy daughter date night has just popped up on my Facebook. Seems a bit bizarre.

OP posts:
MyotherUsernameisaPun · 01/05/2018 13:46

Date night is a very weird and cringy name but there's lots of evidence to support the theory that one on one time between fathers and daughters is incredibly helpful for building up self-esteem and fostering positive relationships in girls. I don't know why it can't just be called 'fathers being active parents to their kids' though...

DannyLaRuesBestFrock · 01/05/2018 13:46

The thread was doing so well not feeding the troll!

Sorry walking 😖

Dancingleopard · 01/05/2018 13:46

If you choose to find issue with the word date it’s your problem tbh.

I say to my friends - ‘it’s a date’ when we plan something - nothing sexual going on there Hmm

Dd has daddy a daughter ‘date’ and there is nothing sexual there. And yeah she does see him as one of her hero’s as he is is bloody good father and hopefully will set the standard of who she allows her self to be treated when she meets some one.

I think some of you are just projecting your own issues IMO

WalkingOnAFlashlightBeam · 01/05/2018 13:48

Oh Christ, dancing, read the thread. It's not about your husband's and daughter's relationship, believe it or not.

ThymeLord · 01/05/2018 13:48

No projecting from me ta.

Surely he helps her set the standard of what to expect in future relationships by the way he treats you? Not treating his daughter as a date? Confused

Hideandgo · 01/05/2018 13:49

Gosh people on here are a little...uptight. The level of anger in some of those posts is actually amusing.

I take my kids on dates, just me and them, 1 on 1. But then I didn’t know a date means you have to have sex with someone, I thought it was a chance to get to know someone more and go somewhere nice. So the word date works fine for us with that meaning.

WalkingOnAFlashlightBeam · 01/05/2018 13:49

The level of anger in some of those posts is actually amusing.

You must have a pretty dull life.

Dancingleopard · 01/05/2018 13:49

I don't know why it can't just be called 'fathers being active parents to their kids' though...

Well some fathers are all ready very active with their kids. And that is a bit of a mouthful rather than two words.

We also have mummy daughter dates - I don’t care if you find it cringe. Dd enjoys it so we do.

Mood hoovers!

ThymeLord · 01/05/2018 13:51

Great.....er..well done?

Maybe read the links so you can understand the wider context.

Shitterton · 01/05/2018 13:53

I don't like the use of the word 'date' in this context. I have 3 children and I spend time with each of them individually, as does my husband. We just say "going out with Dad/Mum". The 'date' thing is weird.

I also don't like it when longstanding couples say they're going on a 'date' night. If you're not yet an official couple, you go on a date. Otherwise, you're just going out to dinner, the cinema, the theatre or whatever.

'Date' makes my husband taking out my daughter sound seedy, whereas they're just going to the local noodle bar for a chat and a laugh away from the usual craziness of the household. My son goes out with him too, obviously. That would sound even weirder! "I'm taking my son on a date"!

TheAntiBoop · 01/05/2018 13:55

The debate over the meaning of the word 'date' is derailing

It is not the language used but the purpose of the event that is creepy

(And the concept of an innocent daddy daughter date is also unsettling because the underlying assumption is that daddy is not a hands on parent who is naturally spending quality time with his child)

catinapoolofsunshine · 01/05/2018 13:56

Dancing and others in favour of this - have you not noticed that this is an event advertised as a Daddy daughter date night. Not one individual parent going for dinner with their child and using the word date because they reserve the time evey Tuesday. It's an organised event only for fathers to "date" their daughters. Nobody else, no fathers and sons, no mothers and daughters, no other combinations.

It does sound exactly like that creepy American shit in the links.

Dancingleopard · 01/05/2018 13:57

Thyme honestly if you see that a father taking his daughter out on a daddy daughter date is sexual it’s you that has the problem.

Dh treats me great - as I do him. So yes that’s naturally setting the standard. He also, as do I, have a independent relationship with our kids which I think is important . There is nothing wrong or creepy with picking out a date and planning something lovely with one of your kids and putting a label on it.

WalkingOnAFlashlightBeam · 01/05/2018 13:59

I can see you're being wilfully obtuse, dancingleopard.

ThymeLord · 01/05/2018 13:59

It's me who's strange if I think it's creepy to apply labels that seek to sexualise a relationship between a father and daughter?! OK.

AmeliaFolch · 01/05/2018 14:00

Wow I clicked on this expecting nice stories about going to the cinema, a film and snacks on the sofa or Dad showing his kids how to make/fix something. The whole date idea is a bit strange. My Dad would take DB and I out for a Chinese a few times a year or let us 'help' in his workshop. We'd really just stand there and hold a spirit level feeling important and chatting about anything and everything while he worked. Seriously I agree with other posters who find it a bit weird and about reinforcing a certain idea of how a woman should behave. There's plenty of other ways to spend quality time with your kids and teach them to value themselves and others.

Dancingleopard · 01/05/2018 14:03

walking HmmGrin no. Just have my own opinion on it which is allowed.

There is bigger shit to get worked up about rather than the word ‘date’ meaning that I and dh are sexualising our kids because we use the phrase. Honestly Hmm

Dancingleopard · 01/05/2018 14:05

thyme your the person that’s implying it so yes.

KERALA1 · 01/05/2018 14:06

I don't feel strongly about it really - but on first glance it does seem abit creepy. Also agree making out that a father and daughter spending time together is some sort of rare event/big deal.

DH often takes the girls out just him for ice cream. He is much better at shopping for their clothes than I am so he does that (though he needs a lie down when they get home). No labelling (especially labelling with sexual overtones) is required surely.

PaulHollywoodsSexGut · 01/05/2018 14:06

If your daughter was chatting with her mates on a Monday “what did you do this weekend small leopard?”

“Went on a date with my dad”

You don’t think her contemporaries would think it’s a bit weird?

Surely “my dad took me out to Nando’s” is normal?

ThymeLord · 01/05/2018 14:08

I'm not implying anything about you. Why are you trying to make this about you?

Ohmydayslove · 01/05/2018 14:11

I find couples saying date night unbelievably twee and annoying.

Applying it to kids is creepy and unnecessary. Just do what normal parents do and parent.

Dancingleopard · 01/05/2018 14:12

Play date
Puppy date

It’s just an over used word that’s lost it’s relevance.

So when I take my five year old dd out on and M&D date am I treating her as a young lesbian?

Honestly if you look hard enough you will find fault in most things

TheAntiBoop · 01/05/2018 14:14

Dancing - the daddy daughter dates being discussed here are not just a dad going out with his daughter - it's about the dad taking the daughter on a date to show her how she should be treated

I'm assuming that's not what your Dh is doing

Dancingleopard · 01/05/2018 14:18

No paul I don’t think they would. Plenty of times dh has taken dd out with our friends dd and they had a double father and daughter date Shock

They went to the theatre and had a blast. It really is what you want to read in to it.

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