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AIBU?

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Original poster

I've identified someone on here

248 replies

ihatethedentist · 27/04/2018 19:18

I've identified someone on here, I 100% know that it's her, there is no doubt. Do I tell her? She's my DH's ex-wife and she has a lot to say about him and me! She unfortunately has given away a little too much of herself. It's really quite amusing to read, but do I tell her I know, would IBU not to? She's not been pleasant about me and it's good to know how she really feels, so i'm tempted to stay undercover.

OP posts:
Shaboohshoobah1 · 27/04/2018 19:33

I found my sister on here instantly, from one post. I knew her writing style instantly. So just to make sure, I looked up her other posts and it is 100% most definitely her. She has given away an alarming amount of information - school she went to, husband’s job, ages of children. I did think about telling her, but she would know I have read it all now, so it’s a bit late.

Moral of the story - don’t give away too much information on here Wink

validusername1 · 27/04/2018 19:33

I would keep quiet for now if I were you OP and see what else she posts, how awkward!

Queenofthestress · 27/04/2018 19:33

Three sides to every story means there's her side, your side and the truth

Aprilmightbemynewname · 27/04/2018 19:34

His side.
Her side..
The truth?

Annabelle4 · 27/04/2018 19:34

Maybe she recognised you too, and it's intentional?

PoorYorick · 27/04/2018 19:35

If you disagree with her version of events that strongly, it is possible that it isn't her.

NoNoCharlieRascal · 27/04/2018 19:35

I would guess three sides means her side, your side and somewhere in the middle the truth.

Or when ex wives are involved, his side, your side, her side and then the truth.

bloomsburyer · 27/04/2018 19:36

I'd do the same as @DaanSaaf Grin

Original poster
ihatethedentist · 27/04/2018 19:36

Oh I see, thanks @Queenofstress. I agree, she may feel her side is the truth and I think the same.

I also agree, it's not really fair to know, but it's not me that's given the game away with too much info.

I'm way too nosey to not keep reading even though it's not particularly healthy. Well for now anyway. She may read this and name change? There may be a lot out there doing it just in case.

OP posts:
Grilledaubergines · 27/04/2018 19:36

ihate

Sorry I wasn’t meaning you were lying or anything just that there are three sides to every story - your side, her side and the truth. It’s about people’s perceptions of a situation isn’t it. Upset hurt you feel because of x, y, z is felt by her but for different reasons. And somewhere in the middle is the reality.

Sunflowerhappy · 27/04/2018 19:37

Don't tell her

SelkieUnderLand · 27/04/2018 19:38

Is it me!? if it is, say nothing because I know more about him than you do.

Shaboohshoobah1 · 27/04/2018 19:38

Yes, I wonder if my sister will see this and change her username now? Sis, do it - or I will keep reading your stuff Grin

ICouldBeSomebodyYouKnow · 27/04/2018 19:38

What would you hope to gain from telling her that you have identified her?

I'd put my efforts into my DH, and looking after your own reputation with any mutual acquaintances.

QueenOfCatan · 27/04/2018 19:38

Dont say anything! You'll be accused of stalking and it's handy to know how she feels I suppose!
I recognised my sister once upon a time. I knew nothing about the situation she was describing (wasn't really talking to my family much at that point) and was enjoying a brilliant cheeky fucker style thread about ops sister and then eventually clocked on that it was my sister bitching about the other one. It was hilarious as there was so much exaggeration and lies! I kept an eye on her for a little while after that and she came out with some horrific things, I wish I could call her out on it.

Sunflowerhappy · 27/04/2018 19:39

Don't tell her

Original poster
ihatethedentist · 27/04/2018 19:40

@Selkiunderland (unless you've name changed no I don't think so) but you have the same attitude as her, she thinks because we've only been together for six short years, she still knows everything about him and I know nothing.

OP posts:
House4 · 27/04/2018 19:40

Ooo I’m torn - so much fun or anger to be had at reading all her posts!
I think I would just have to comment on every post! Love the idea someone else had of giving little things away so she may suspect it’s you!

tinytemper66 · 27/04/2018 19:40

Give some great advice and see if she takes it in real life! Grin

willynillypie · 27/04/2018 19:41

Grasslands

That's really unpleasant!

FullMetalRabbit · 27/04/2018 19:42

there is an ex-friend of mine on here - she did some pretty awful things to me - she never talks about me but I won't let her know I know her user name. She is still a pathological liar though!

QueenB14 · 27/04/2018 19:43

Right so I don't think its me! (hope not??)

Thanks for the heart attack Grin

And I would say I think, just to stop myself noseying advance searching hourly

SelkieUnderLand · 27/04/2018 19:43

Good, well, I'd probably say nothing. I'd be torn between wondering if read her posts could serve me somehow. Probably not, it'd probably annoy me.

I don't know what my xh has told his wife tbh. He could have been honest! He could have said I treated her like shit for 7 years and got a shock when she left. Anything is possible!

PyongyangKipperbang · 27/04/2018 19:43

Well if your glee at having "caught her out" on here is anything to go by, I can see why she doesnt like you. And if its me (having written about ex's wife a couple of times who pushed him to cut contact with DD and tried to prevent him paying any maintenance) I couldnt care less :)

ghostyslovesheets · 27/04/2018 19:44

Julie? Is that you???

(if so you soooo were the other woman!)