Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Softzilla returns..... to soft play

999 replies

Unreasonableunreasonableness · 24/04/2018 19:57

Probably will be a boring thread as i mainly intend to continue just ignoring and refusing to be drawn in to any games but...

Guess where I went today? And who I bumped into there? (I really need to find another place to hang out with people! )
Well she was there when I turned up with party mum. We greeted her with a surprised slightly awkward 'oh... hi!' which she returned, but then sat at a different table.
Later in the afternoon when I'd got home she called and i picked up without thinking. She said she wanted to chat and make it so that we could start going to our usual group again - she seemed to be under the impression that I was no longer going. And asked if she could come over right then. I said no sorry as it was time for dinner/ bath/ bed etc for my dc. I also told her that I was still attending the group and that she didn't need to worry about attending, I joked that it's big enough for both of us..... and she put the phone down. I wondered if it was a mistake but she never called back if it was and I don't want to call her.

OP posts:
BlueEyedBengal · 30/05/2018 21:10

Sorry repeat post as I phone and me not getting along

Willow2017 · 30/05/2018 21:10

Themonkey
Op has taken police advice. He said her last message to stop contacting her and telling her she would take professional advice if she didn't wad enough to involve them if she continued to harass her. She doesnt need to contact SZ again. It would just egg her on any way, any reaction at all is good in SZ eyes.

BlueEyedBengal · 30/05/2018 21:16

WiFi playing upHmm

daffodillament · 30/05/2018 21:21

Thanks Mirror for the update. And thanks Madmags for the advice ! Grin This is serious shit !

MoreCoffeePlease123 · 30/05/2018 21:25

Hope you are ok OP. I had similar with a “friend”. Hundreds of missed calls, turning up at my house, even invented having cancer in order to get my attention. Eventually it stopped (I think she got bored), but I remember how awful it felt. Incredibly suffocating and a constant feeling of being on edge.

ItsNachoCheese · 30/05/2018 21:43

Hope you are doing okay and the chat with the police tomorrow goes well

C0untDucku1a · 30/05/2018 21:52

Taken me 30 mins to read upsates so probably behind but tying to get you to drip your dd off and theres not actually a party is appalling.

YouTheCat · 30/05/2018 21:56

The fact that she's trying to involve a minor in her batshittery is really bad.

Theg00dwife · 30/05/2018 21:59

Well done OP for being so sensible about it all. I can't believe this is still going on. She's mad as a bucket of frogs but best be safe and speak to the Police x

mmzz · 30/05/2018 22:13

How does everyone know that the party isn't a party? Agree it's odd, especially pressuring to have a young child on his own, but how does everyone know for sure that there is no party?

mmzz · 30/05/2018 22:13

How does everyone know that the party isn't a party? Agree it's odd, especially pressuring to have a young child on his own, but how does everyone know for sure that there is no party?

Mirrorwriting · 30/05/2018 22:32

Looney I forgot that part, yes Softzilla also said that because op was the ‘host’ (Hmm of a soft play midweek casual meet-up) op should pay.

Mzzz - Softzilla only knows op casually but invited her to this anniversary. No one else in the social circle including a sort of relation of Softzilla has been invited to any party. There isn’t one.

Willow2017 · 30/05/2018 22:44

You need to invite people to come for a party, none of her other friends have been invited or know anything about it only OP!

TryingToForgeAnewLife · 30/05/2018 22:52

OP - when was the last time you actually told her to stop contacting you and to leave you alone?

MyOtherProfile · 30/05/2018 23:03

Trying it was yesterday morning I think. Not long ago anyway.

mmzz · 30/05/2018 23:06

Agree it's odd (about the party) but just because none of the small handful that the OP checked with know nothing of the party, does not mean that there is no party and no one else in the world is invited.

You are probably all correct, but, you have to admit that there is a small chance that everyone else's invitations will go out later, or, for reasons best known to herself, SZ has decided to invite only the OP out of her soft play friendship groupalong with a range of people from other parts of her life?

Otherwise what are you all thinking SZ intended to do with the OPs child when she had him alone with her at the pub?

mmzz · 30/05/2018 23:06

Agree it's odd (about the party) but just because none of the small handful that the OP checked with know nothing of the party, does not mean that there is no party and no one else in the world is invited.

You are probably all correct, but, you have to admit that there is a small chance that everyone else's invitations will go out later, or, for reasons best known to herself, SZ has decided to invite only the OP out of her soft play friendship groupalong with a range of people from other parts of her life?

Otherwise what are you all thinking SZ intended to do with the OPs child when she had him alone with her at the pub?

Rocinante1 · 30/05/2018 23:19

I think softzilla is in love with/infatuated with OP, which is why she'd ask to meet up outside of the usual group in the first place. She felt they had some sort of connection and felt entitled to be treated to a day out. And has now gone bunny boiler at the rejection.
Softzilla's friends at the group even said that she hadn't given them any details of what happened - coz you can't explain to your friends that you are a bunny boiler stalker lady.

ReanimatedSGB · 30/05/2018 23:21

I think that Softzilla invented this party idea as a way to get OP to engage with her away from witnesses (whether or not her intention is any kind of physical assault). But her behaviour is clearly escalating way, way beyond normal and she seems to be slipping away from reality altogether. I think it's actually possible that she has some kind of idea of holding the DC to some sort of ransom - not for money, but for OP to apologise, or beg, or agree to something.

Definitely contact the police tomorrow OP, show them all the texts and missed calls and tell them that you want to make it an official complaint or whatever.

MyOtherProfile · 30/05/2018 23:37

When is the party supposed to be?

Willow2017 · 30/05/2018 23:44

Mmzz
Op isnt even a friend of Sz just an acquaintance its funny none of her actual friends know of any anniversary party just op.

PaulHollywoodsSexGut · 30/05/2018 23:52

Jeeesus peasus, this woman seems more unhinged with every update Shock

mmzz · 30/05/2018 23:54

Willow I know. Let me re-phrase:
I think it's about 90% likely that there is no party st all, even for friends and family. Everyone else appears to think that it's 100% based on the slimness of the OPs acquaintance and the fact that no one else the OP knows has been invited (yet/ ever?). I was asking if there was any evidence that there isn't a party?

Glaciferous · 30/05/2018 23:57

Regardless of whether there is a party, it seems a bit inappropriate to be pressuring the OP to leave her preschool child at the 'party' without a parent.

Good luck, OP. I am sorry you are having all this random nonsense in your life.

DuckbilledSplatterPuff · 31/05/2018 03:41

Oh Lordy Unreasonableness! I can't believe SZ's still contacting you after you texted her very clearly not to. 14 atttempts too. It is total harrassment.
Agree with you Glaciferous. The whole party thing, to which not one of OP's mutual acquaintances have been invited is ridiculous, and even if it was real - involving a preschooler is dodgy.
OP, so glad that your CPO now knows all about it and is supportive, and also that the soft play leader, who is an impartial personas has also seen and canconfirm SZ's behaviour first hand and has said she will ensure it is a safe place for you to viisit. This is real progress. Any further nonsense from SZ will now be observed.
I really hope that this will help bring this whole matter to a conclusion for you OP. This must have been a very diffcult time for you. Stay strong and good luck