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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

For being peed off that shop assistant made dd say thank you beofre giving her her sweets

393 replies

twobabies · 12/05/2007 15:45

Hi All

I really would like to know if IABU or not, so dd is not yet two and only just started talking. She can say thank you (well she says cue but we know what she means .

We went to the shop today for her treat as she has done really well with her potty training this week and we promised her a little choccy bar. We walked down and when I let her choose she was so excited, picked one and we went to the till. The shop was packed so she had been holding it for about 5 mins before we got to the till then I took it of her for the lady to scan and dd had a small winge.

The shop lady then says to dd loudly "well if your going to be like that your not having it back until you say thank you" whilst holding it out to dd? I said she doesnt talk actually and dd is quite shy around strangers so I knew she wouldn't. The shop assistant just looked at dd and said "well are you going to say thank you" dd is now hiding in my legs looking at me really upset. I said to the woman look she isn't going to say thank you and she said "oh i'm not sure you really deserve this then" before handing it over to me.

I think the reason i'm upset is because dd was so excited as she hardly gets sweets/choccy at all and I really thought this witch had spoilt it and made it look like dd had no manners to everyone else in the shop.

Please tell me if i'm just being hormonal or if this woman is actually mad?

OP posts:
ShinyHappyPeopleHoldingHands · 13/05/2007 13:28

LOL at Xenia and her ideas about what consitutes "fundamental parenting error". She has "fundamental social issues" which is something of a worry considering what she says she does for a living..

allgonebellyup · 13/05/2007 13:54

What does Xenia do for a living??

whomovedmychocolate · 13/05/2007 14:46

Xenia - so you hate the word chav but don't mind taking folks to task for being working class so prone to fat unhealthy lifestyles? Just because you don't label someone doesn't mean you aren't applying unfair sterotypes.

veraduckworthshandbag · 13/05/2007 14:54
Hmm
veraduckworthshandbag · 13/05/2007 14:55

xenia, do you ever wonder why your a single parent??????

God help the poor man who saw fit to leave you.

Judy1234 · 13/05/2007 15:02

A lucky escape for him may be.

twinsetandpearls · 13/05/2007 15:32

veraduckworthshandbag I think that is out of order actually. I didn't think personal insults were meant to happen on here. By all means disagree with Xenia I often do (although I am working class and fat and do gives dp too many sweets! ) but please don;t sink to such depths.

Jennylee · 13/05/2007 15:43

yeah a bit much really, she is a snob and a bit sour but even a Scottish person would not involve her real personal life in this bag o' mince

Judy1234 · 13/05/2007 16:01

I have heaps of personal faults, don't worry. Just like anyone.

JoanCrawford · 13/05/2007 16:21

Xenia, I disagree with most of what you say on mn BUT, I must tell you how I'd admire your grace. You always rise above the, increasingly personal, insults.

FlossALump · 13/05/2007 16:27

I'd like to try and argue, but as I find the whole class system totally baffling especially with regard to where we fit in to it, I won't. As I'm not entirely sure what angle I should be coming from! FWIW a system as simple as working, middle and upper class has to be rubbish really, and theories based on it similarly so. It is just to oversimplified with too many overlaps.

FWIW I think the OP is not being unreasonable!

ShinyHappyPeopleHoldingHands · 13/05/2007 16:28

Xenia rises about the insults fired at her... because "she" is a bloke.

kimi · 13/05/2007 16:33

Can I let my kids out of the cupboard yet??

Judy1234 · 13/05/2007 16:40

ah.. that might explain why I haven't got a boyfriend - the hidden penis puts them off.

Gingermonkey · 13/05/2007 16:41

DD had a fruit shoot today and some ice cream Helloooo Kimi, are those kids still in the cupboard? Did you leave them in there with a 2 litre bottle of coke?

foxybrown · 13/05/2007 16:44

Yes, Kimi, let them out for good behaviour. Get them a Big Mac as a treat.

allgonebellyup · 13/05/2007 16:52

Xenia. lol, you are a funny one..

ScottishMummy · 13/05/2007 17:00

oi Kimi - LOL its like the secretary in brittas empire with the kids in the drawers and cupboards so let those kids out thee cupboard now its been long enough , if they are unruly put em in the fridge like i do -soon cool the jets literally and metaphorically

kimi · 13/05/2007 17:05

I will let them out and give them a KFC bucket
Xenia, we could have a mumsnet whipround so you could get "the chop" (thank you for the house advice btw, its been sorted out now)

kimi · 13/05/2007 17:05

hellllooooooo gingermonkey.

Gingermonkey · 13/05/2007 17:06

I went to JJB sports today to get some weights (for my bingo wings) and there was a queue for KFC drive thru - it was blocking the road!!!! PMSL. Lazy gits, why not just park up and go in????

foxybrown · 13/05/2007 17:24

mmm, kfc mega bucket. given i am pg is it more acceptable or less acceptable?

What thread am I on?

daisybump · 13/05/2007 17:32

This still going then????

Twobabies, from what you said in your OP (if anyone actually remebers what the OP was actually about)....not unreasonable...she sounds like a scary witch and I'd've complained about her to the management....

Xenia...you seem to have hi-jacked this thread as a soap box for airing your views on class distinctions....so FWIW, I was brought up in a council house by working class parents surrounded by other working class families, none of whom were obese as chldren, or now as adults....but then again it was the 70s and we were outdoor active kids (no X-boxes or Wis or 24 hour telly for us)....and we didn't get fed junk food and chocolate cos:

  1. we couldn't afford treats, being dirt poor and all
  2. Ready meals/McDonalds etc didn't exist in this country at that time to the extent that they do today.

I think the country's obesity problem is more to do with the rise of cheap mass over processed foods and sugary cereals than any other single factor and I'm guessing that obesity rates/heart disease have risen over all demograhic groups rather than just in the less well off.

Giving a child the occasional treat/incentive is not a bad thing to do
even over issues such as potty training, IMO. One does what works best for ones own kids and if the OPs DD responds to such treats then who are you or anyone else to criticise?

ludaloo · 13/05/2007 17:48

It would hack me off too twobabies
Our local mini supermarket has one particular assistant in it who winds me up a treat every time! I have 3 small children and all I want to do is get in and out quickly. Every bloomin time this lady sees fit to advise me or the kids on what they have chosen, makes them say thank you (which if they weren't humiliated into doing they probably would say it anyway)
And FWIW your dd is not alone in winging when they have to hand their treat over to be scanned, my 21 month old finds it very hard to understand too.

I also feel there is no harm in a treat now and then either. Well done to your dd for her potty progress

ludaloo · 13/05/2007 17:53

LOL "Xenia's World....Party Time"!!!!

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