So what happens when you have nothing in common with dp & dc?

[whattheactualfuckery]

Away for a break with dh and 2 x ds. I've hated it and then, what the actual fuck do I do?

*THEM

LTB

:(

Is this how you usually feel, or a rare occasion?

Is it something easily fixable like finding a hobby you have in common, or are they fundamentally so different from you that you see no hope of common ground?

How old are the kids? are they a tricky age?

Why do you hate them? Seems a bit extreme.

You need a bit of give and take. Your interests and theirs although do you really not have anything in common?!

Find something for some 'you' time?
Sometimes Xbox and The Simpsons is too much for me at home. Bath calls!

How old are your kids, OP? How do you all get on at home?

If they all share the same interests, there's nothing wrong with him taking them away on a trip that they'll enjoy so that you can spend time doing something else.

What is your ideal trip?

Hate is a very strong word. Are they your biological children or theirs? What is it that is making you have these feelings?

I go on holidays with friends my family don't share my interests sadly. however I love having a life of my own outside family unit

Is this just on holiday or is it at home in ordinary life too.
The first option is easily dealt with - don't go on or severely limit holidays with them.
The second is a little more complicated.

It's generally always. Kids are 13 and 14 and yes they are my own. I backpacked for 8 years in my teens/early 20's so love to travel but I can't connect with my boys or other half in any way! Any thing I suggest is no good!

Mmmm... I have one child with naturally shared interests, the other not. So try to find things we all like which are very few and mean no one is happy. No idea what to suggest

Holidays with my teenage and student DSs are not what I would choose. I like a beach, a pool, nice food and some good books. DS1 wants to be with his mates, DS2 wants to have his laptop and decent wifi, DS3 want to go to a water park, then ten pin bowling, then go on his laptop.

I compromise by doing a city break for a few days followed by a holiday park with water park. I could just not bother, but they are my family and it's not their fault they aren't more like me.

Well, presumably at some point in your shared past, you had something to talk to your partner about, some common ground. What was it?

Oh no, tell us more. What do they like? What do you like?

I have 2 teen DS, and we have had a few good trips that had everyone happy!

It is about compromises, no? I am also beginning to see the point of rugby, the Rock, sci fi movies and superheroes

We cut "deals" all the time where all of us have an equal say

Give and take

But what exactly is it they love that you hate? For us it is theme parks, so we don't do them (but will drive them to UK ones with their friends).

What are the teens and your husband interested in?

Dh blames his age on lack of energy or motivation, he's 60. Boys idolise him and settle for what little he has to offer. I suggest something and it's a big fat no!

So none of them are interested in anything? not any sports or music or anything?

If you HATE your 13 and 14 year old sons you really need to take a look at what os going on outside of the holiday.

Have you always hated them or is it recent? Anything else going on? Any history of MH?

Ultimately you have the choice to walk away

I feel so trapped I want to scream! I was a full time sm to dh children now adult children. We used to slag her off for leaving them, but now I'm considering the same

What about a beach or pool holiday and all lounge around together, maybe you re trying to do too much and everyone else just wants to relax.

I feel like you have posted about this before. They are your DC, you don’t have to share common interests with them. I share zero with my parents. We still have a loving relationship and can have great conversations. We talk about our lives, food, family, maybe something we have read or watched, have a political discussion. My parenfs are not outdoorsy but I like walks but we can still spend time together and apart.
If I may say so, you seem to have decided that they are a team and they are against you? Is this to do with the fact that they are boys by any chance? (And did you post a thread about how if you’d had girls it would have all been different?)
Why don’t you ask the boys to suggest some activities and you join in as well? Since presumably you brought them up you’ve had a hand in shaping their worldview and interests, or is that too simplistic?

Hating your partner and children is very very different to not having shared interests with them. Do you genuinely hate them?

How long have you felt you hate them all op?