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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Why does your teen hate you today?

194 replies

AjasLipstick · 08/04/2018 09:41

Mine's 13...apparently I'm terrible parent because I offered her the meal she really loved up until today...it was a steak sandwich on crusty bread with a side salad.

Last week this was "amazing" and "my favourite"

Tonight I told her I was making it again and she said OH NO I HATE THAT!!!!

Hmm

I said...well you could have some stir fried noodles?

No. She wanted a certain dish from our local Chinese takeaway.

I said no.

DH said yes...and offered her the cash to go and buy it.

That's evil too though. We should apparently go for her in the car as it's AGES AWAY! TOO FAR!

It's a 5 minute walk.

She's now sitting in her room, hating us and refusing anything.

I'm ignoring.

OP posts:
Toomanytealights · 09/04/2018 07:42

Which one?

Teen 1(14)-because I didn't tell him to buy himself some chocolate biscuits when he ran in to the Coop to buy himself some crisps for his packed lunch on his way to volunteering.

Teen2(13)-because I apparently duped her into going on a walk whilst waiting to pick up Teen 1 when half an hour early on beautiful Dartmoor in sonfar this year scarce sunshine

Teen3-(14)-because I reminded him that he'd need to pay back the £50 he borrowed off us before spending further pocket money and wages.

Just lovin these teenage years.HmmGin

Toomanytealights · 09/04/2018 07:50

Oh yeah and because I cracked open the bathroom door a cm with my head turned away whilst dteen 3was in the shower after having hollered outside it repeatedly that we needed to leave asap and would be late thanks to him not getting out of bed quick enough after repeated warnings.

I am now apparently a creep who spends my time hovering outside bathroom doors trying to get a glimpse of teenage boys.Hmm

I also don't shout loud enough- apparently. Not what he was saying when I was reminding him re the money he owed in a nice calm quiet voice. Then I was told there was no need to shout and my voice is too loud.Hmm

PookieDo · 09/04/2018 07:56

Mine are still asleep but yesterday DD2 hated me because in Tesco I asked her what she wanted for lunch and she said a sandwich and refused to elaborate further on what should be in it, and watched me buy tiger bread.
We get home and DD1 and I make soup, and leave her some buttered bread for the sandwich at which point

  1. Our soup smelt horrible and it was unfair we made the house smell
  2. There was nothing but cheese to eat in the sandwich, and she didn’t want cheese
  3. She denied all recollection of our Tesco conversation about what to have for lunch
  4. She hates sandwiches and hates me
  5. Ended up eating fruit and yoghurt while glaring at me across the table for not daring to read her mind or psychically predict what food she may want
autumnboys · 09/04/2018 08:00

Ds(14) is displeased with us because DH is taking him & his younger brothers to see some cousins for a couple of days. I’m not going because I’m working. He was being semi-stoic about it until last night, when he was invited to a meeting with 24hrs notice. He really wanted to go to the meeting. We have suggested he FaceTime in via a friend who will be there,but apparently we ‘don’t understand’.

Ratonastick · 09/04/2018 08:06

Could be anything. He’s only grunted at me for days. If he forms words at any point, I may find out. Whatever the issue, I am fairly confident it will be my fault for being so unreasonable.

oohyoudevilyou · 09/04/2018 08:10

Teen 1 (F14) hates me because she was stroppily opening a new pack of Clover and I said there was already one opened. Cue Clover being slung forcefully (fast bowl overarm) back in fridge and two bites of dry un-Clovered toast being angrily chewed and remainder binned.

Teen 2 (M16) hates the entire world because DH and I both asked if he was up yet, 5 minutes apart (he wasn't).

extinctspecies · 09/04/2018 08:14

Yesterday I cooked him sausages & scrambled eggs & toast for Brunch when he got up at midday.

Then he asked what was for lunch at 2 pm so I said you have misunderstood what Brunch is. If you are hungry make a snack.

He made his older brother drive him to the supermarket to buy a Pot Noodle because he would STARVE otherwise.

ManchesterGin · 09/04/2018 08:18

Because I made him have a day off Fortnite yesterday. He’s only 12 but apparently I am the least cool mother in the entire world Hmm

jobbymcginty · 09/04/2018 08:24

My ds isn't even a teenager yer he's only 11, but my god he's a nightmare already!
Yesterday I asked him to help tidy up his baby brothers sand pit that he'd made a mess of ( not the baby) cue his muttering then saying this is why I never play out doors! Stamped up the stairs. I then turned of wifi cue him grovelling crying down the stairs to me . If this is what he's like at 11 it's only going to get worse

InspMorse · 09/04/2018 08:42

Oh Grin My teens don't stand a chance in our house!
My own teenage behaviour which comes out whenever they threaten to be totally unreasonable and brattish outdoes the lot of them.
My refusing to move, sulking 'because they're being unreasonable' always has them snorting with laughter because I 'look ridiculous' apparently.
My youngest announced that she had never known such an immature Mum.
Reverse psychology at it's finest. They swear that they will never 'behave' or 'look like that' Grin

PookieDo · 09/04/2018 08:46

Mine also accuse me of being an idiot. I will sing dance and shout loudly in any setting especially to diffuse a situation

BiddyPop · 09/04/2018 08:52

After a weekend where we prepped her gear every night, bought exactly what she wanted and made packed lunches every day, spent hours each (like, 2 hours on admin stand, 7 hours on standby to assist coach and then almost 20 hours doing safety duty on the water for just me over 3 days - while DH did at least another 6 hours pulling boat trollies around for launch and recovery over 2 days) volunteering on an event she was doing (and we were originally down for just the 3 hours doing admin! I lost my WHOLE and already BUSY weekend to it!).....about 30 minutes after she got home, had finally wound down from telling us all the stories, we walked upstairs to get something and...."I'm bored, there's nothing to do" !!!!!

GreenVelvetwithfrills · 09/04/2018 08:53

Late teens and still have this, also have much younger children.
One day friends whose current toddlers have grown up to be teens, will realise the stress we’ve been living under...good luck to them.
We will also have it all to do again too...
I’m told they are nice again by about age 21 or 22

BiddyPop · 09/04/2018 08:53

Followed by a strop as we wanted her to have a shower and wash her hair (it was a rat's nest after 2 days on the water). Before going back to school this morning...

jmh740 · 09/04/2018 09:59

Greenvelvet my 23 year old is just starting to become normal but can still strip. He is home from uni at the moment he doesn't live at home but visited at the weekend I told him Fri night we would go out for breakfast in the morning. I gave him a shout at half 9 when I go in the shower dd 11 and ds 8 went in the bedroom lots of times to ask him to get up when he finally surfaced at 11and asked where we were going I told him I had wanted to go to brewers fair (buffet breakfast kids eat free and play area) but we'd have to go to spoons because it was the only place still serving breakfast. I was unreasonable because I didn't tell him to get up early. My reply that i thought at his age he knew what time breakfast was and that various people had been asking him to get up for an hour and a half didn't go down well!

speakout · 09/04/2018 11:21

Nope, sorry I am loving the teen years.

Brilliant kids- bad words are rarely spoken in this house.

It's very harmonious.

Highhorse1981 · 09/04/2018 12:58

Teen 1 (F14) hates me because she was stroppily opening a new pack of Clover and I said there was already one opened. Cue Clover being slung forcefully (fast bowl overarm) back in fridge and two bites of dry un-Clovered toast being angrily chewed and remainder binned.

I would have got very cross at this! What did you do?

bringbacksideburns · 09/04/2018 13:04

Speakout - great contribution. Hope it makes you better!Confused

bringbacksideburns · 09/04/2018 13:04

Feel better

EphraimLevi · 09/04/2018 13:06

Mine (14) hates me because I’ve just ordered her new clothes and took the three day free delivery option instead of the £5 next day.

Ivorbig1 · 09/04/2018 13:07

Best thing I ever learnt was to shrug and eye roll. Don’t offer so many many options fgs.

Highhorse1981 · 09/04/2018 13:12

EphraimLevi You should have cancelled the entire order

Andrewofgg · 09/04/2018 13:13

Reading this with joy - DS is 33 - remembering when my niece was giving my sister the identical same hell she gave my mother and I had no sympathy - she had it coming to her.

Of course that doesn’t apply to anyone here, does it?

BishopBrennansArse · 09/04/2018 13:15

Nope. I was a really easy teenager. Mum can't believe my eldest. Think she would have murdered me if I'd been like him.

EphraimLevi · 09/04/2018 13:15

Seriously felt like it, but she does need new clothes (bras mainly).

I did send her to her room though.

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