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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DS stabbed DD in the head with a fork. Normal sibling stuff?

176 replies

whereverialaymyhat · 23/03/2018 22:07

DS (7) stabbed DD (5) in the head with a fork at the dinner table.

I didn't see it, but her head was bleeding when I came into the kitchen. They fight like cat and dog and it's usually six of one and half of a dozen anyway, so I told him to say sorry and dinner carried on.

Told DH just now when he got in from the pub and he think it's terrible and not normal.

But I think all siblings fight and they're only little. AIBU?

OP posts:
PinkAvocado · 23/03/2018 22:07

I think that goes beyond a sibling spat!

namechangedtoday15 · 23/03/2018 22:09

I don't think that's normal either. At 7 he's old enough to understand it would hurt her. Your DH is right.

Blahdyblaah · 23/03/2018 22:09

I have 4 siblings and we all fought like cat and dog. No one ever stabbed anyone.

HangtheblessedDJ · 23/03/2018 22:09

Not normal. No.

Arapaima · 23/03/2018 22:10

It’s true they’re only little and it’s normal for siblings to fight. But my reaction would be closer to your DH’s than yours. The fact that he used a sharp implement and drew blood - I would be absolutely furious if my 8yo DS did this.

Allthewaves · 23/03/2018 22:10

Er no. I have three boys who fight all the time but I have a zero tolerance policy on physical violence. Id be coming down on him like a ton of bricks. He would have been sent to his room, no electronics for a week.

steff13 · 23/03/2018 22:10

Not normal

AuntLydia · 23/03/2018 22:10

It kind of is but was that all he had to do, say sorry? No further consequences? I'd have sent him up to bed for that at the very least. Do not pass go. He could have really hurt her. There's an imbalance of power and strength there too with him being older. I'd be worried normal sibling stuff could turn into actual bullying.

speakout · 23/03/2018 22:10

No it isn't normal. And 7 is not "only little".

Doilooklikeatourist · 23/03/2018 22:10

That’s not normal

I’m a bit shocked that you think it’s ok

He stabbed her , she’s bleeding but it’s ok because they’re only small ?

No , not ok at all

checkmateboom · 23/03/2018 22:10

Her head was bleeding and he just had to say sorry?! Wtaf

Fruitcorner123 · 23/03/2018 22:10

My children are exactly the same ages and gender and they fight a lot but have never drawn blood I don't think! It's mostly pulling and pushing and deliberately getting into each other's spaces. Desks would know the risks of stabbing his sister with a fork. Was it definitely deliberate?

I would say you underreacted and DS should have at least have had a very stern talking to and in my house would have been sent to his room. What if he had caught her eye?

NewYearNewMe18 · 23/03/2018 22:11

This was my house 20 years ago. They are relatively civilised now.

WorraLiberty · 23/03/2018 22:11

You 'told him to say sorry'?

Yeah, that'll learn 'im Hmm

PasDeDeux · 23/03/2018 22:11

Absolutely not normal and I cant believe you dismissed it as such :/

Fruitcorner123 · 23/03/2018 22:11

DS not desks

steff13 · 23/03/2018 22:11

No it isn't normal. And 7 is not "only little."

Yeah, my daughter is 7, and she knows better than to stab anyone with anything.

AssassinatedBeauty · 23/03/2018 22:12

No it's not normal, and neither was your reaction. Just saying "sorry" and nothing else? He could have caught her in the eye and done some serious damage, it's incredibly dangerous.

How is your daughter? I hope she's ok.

lattewith3shotsplease · 23/03/2018 22:13

OP,
Has he ever used weapons before ?

Maybe he just lashed out and didn't think about the fork in his hand.

If it was done intentionally, then I would say this is not really "normal" behaviour.

Was he upset he'd hurt his sister ?

DairyisClosed · 23/03/2018 22:13

It is absolutely not normal for seven year old to stab people. Quite frankly I couldn't imagine my three year old doing something like that. But then again we've always been very harsh when creating consequences for violent behaviour.

BiologyMatters · 23/03/2018 22:13

What age does "only little" go up to?

Holycrapwhatnow · 23/03/2018 22:13

Not normal. And terrible to teach any child that anything you could say - no matter how well she was pushing his buttons - is in any way equivalent to being stabbed with a metal implement hard enough to make you bled.
Normally I'm all for assuming everyone's equally in the wrong and letting them sort it out, but the moment there is physical violence then the perpetrator has to face serious consequences.

zzzzz · 23/03/2018 22:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

honeysucklejasmine · 23/03/2018 22:14

Shock I have a twin brother. We fought like anything and he always won the fights but neither of us ever used a weapon!

DangerMouse17 · 23/03/2018 22:14

I'm totally stunned by how relaxed you're being about this OP.

Stabbing soneone in the head is not a normal reaction at any age and I would be seriously concerned.

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